Sometimes, life gives nasty surprises. I was having a big uncalled for pride in being a person of good health all my adult life. I was thankful to the gene on my father’s side where everyone enjoyed robust health. I was also very active and enjoyed life as much as I could.
During the past few years, my life had taken a big turn. I had to brave a lot of unpleasant turmoil and ups and downs. Even then I was glad I did not have any health worries. Pride went before the fall, and it all ended when one Doctor made an in the face announcement” you have blood sugar”!!!
Oh, my, how I had to be strong to face that taunt. It took me weeks to come to terms with it. I felt idiotic for being so proud about my health!. Silly me.
It was a big effort to keep a tab on that. I did quite well for the past 2 years. And once again I thought “ all in control”.
But the lifestyle changes did not last for long it seems. For the past few months , I had to go for hike in medication, (hateful), and admonishment from the Doctor. Hiked medicines played havoc , so reduce it.
Once again , a brave front ’ let me tackle my food intake, and selective food blah blha,’
The tests showed, the glucose level is still unacceptable.
That is bothering me a lot. What with the holiday season, and spate of weddings and allied parties, the food intake is gone haywire. Every day, I resolved to use the blood glucose monitor. Everyday get up , and drink coffee before remembering the trial. May be I did not want to face the reality of the nagging result. I am sure it is gone above normal levels.
I can feel it in my body. There are symptoms when you feel that the sugar levels are higher than normal. But after a lifetime of not putting oneself above other daily chores, it is difficult to think, what to eat, how much sugar, what to cook, added to the stress of cooking for others, cooking for self.
This is a vicious cycle. But the nagging in the mind does not stop. “I have to do this, I don’t want to end up in hospital bed, I don’t want to add to other’s problems”. These thought are important and they egg me on to take some step into monitoring the sugar levels.
Another big win, is to go and buy the Glucose monitor. ( at home, some slight reserved comments: “do you really want to buy, will you really do it?”, Years of spending your life together, people know you better than you do – so reservation is the key to daily life, doubt.. doubt..)
It took 2 months to think of self testing, few weeks more to actually do it.
Here is my experiment with OneTouch Ultra2 :
First, taking the meter out and trying to switch it on. Poked the hand, and inserted the strip. Nothing happening, the meter would not get “on”. Strip promptly thrown into waste paper basket, with feigned lightness. Glare from the most important person in life! I am cringing here, “oh I can do it, let some strip get wasted, but I am going ahead” That moment one wishes one is alone, can decide, go ahead not think of a few strips wasted down the drain, just for the education of it. Anyway, I tried to make light of the situation and quickly folded the kit away. So that domestic peace is not disturbed. However, a few drops tears of self-pity flowed.
The next day “I can do it”, again, put the strip on the wrong side, and wasted one more. But finally, had the patience to read the instructions book and found how to switch it on, ( by inserting the strip properly and deep – it comes on automatically).
Then the lancet. It fumble with it and by mistake the level goes to 6, Poke.. Oooch .. Shock, realized the level can be 3 or 3 and it will do. draw blood,.. test.. Hey. This is so easy
But everything is not comical. The meter is showing mega readings, the levels area way too high.
I need to waste lots of strips before reaching the accepted level good for my health. It is a kind of battle. But I am brave still I am going to fix it soon.
My inspiration : Alan Shanley's book “what one earth Can I eat”.
It is a costly book, for the slim volume , and all it says is “ test, test, test”. The strips are expensive , but gives a satisfaction of knowing where you are heading with your blood glucose levels.
And it has given me confidence to battle my blood glucose.
It is a challenge, and readers, I am going to achieve it.
(very brave indeed!)