W7 R2 after a week off - arrrgh that was a tough mental battle

Well I hadn't run since last Saturday as my daughter has been very ill all week and firstly wouldn't let me leave her side and even if she would, lack of sleep meant I had no energy whatsoever.

Today she was on the mend so I realised I couldn't put it off any longer. Even before the run I was having mental battles with myself. Despite having been doing this running for about 8 weeks and enjoying it, having a week off made me realise how easy it would be to slip back into inactivity and make excuses not to do anything. I spent about 20 minutes faffing around with my running gear before forcing myself out of the door.

I was debating whether to run in the park next to my house or on the street. i decided on the street as I figured if I was feeling in this frame of mind, it would be too easy to give up in the park whereas if I ran away from home I'd have to come back!

I decided to go without Laura and the podcasts today as the music just did my head in on the last run (there was a song about being in the pouring rain that sounded like it was trying to be in the style of the Kooks but sung by someone who sounded like Norman Wisdom - I digress). I did actually enjoy the music a lot more and set off ok. Had the RunKeeper app set for 5 minute intervals. When I hit the 8 minute mark, I was already feeling ready to give up. When I got to 15 minutes I thought I was going to die at the fact there was still 10 minutes left.

Talk about battling demons - they were telling me to give up and I so wanted to but kept thinking of how annoyed I would be if I did. I honestly felt like just lying down on the middle of the pavement at points but I kept plugging on and finished the run in the park. Thank goodness for the Kaiser Chiefs whose song came on right at the end and picked me up a bit. The feeling of relief at the end but my goodness, it completely took it out of me today. I think I need to start running with water as was desperately thirsty when I got home. I also had a little dip of confidence in whether I can do this but am going to read everyone's blogs and perk myself up.

So it's done, only one more run of W7 - let's hope it's not such mental torture

Hope everyone is enjoying the lovelier weather :-)

4 Replies

  • Hi

    I can relate to your run! I have had a couple of them and had one yesterday too. I am expecting my next one to be a little easier but not great. I had a wobble a few weeks back when for similar reasons to you I hadn't run for a couple of weeks. It took me three runs to get back to enjoying it again but I did get back. So don't give up :) ( i have felt like it a few times) I think we will always have the odd bad runs especially with kids as they can deprive us of needed sleep!

    Hope your next run is a little easier :)

  • I hope your daughter is better now. Well done for getting out there and deciding to plan so it would be harder to give up! You are so right, a lot of this running stuff is mental :D as in it's all in our minds. It sounds like you were tired and dehydrated, so you did well to complete this one. All the best for your next run - let us know how it goes.

  • You won the battle, ta dahhhhhh! :-D That is what counts. You did it, you won the arguement with yourself and you shut up that little demon voice that was telling you to give up. You should be very proud of yourself. I have been there too and, you are right, you would have felt really pants if you'd listened to the voice that told you to give up. You are not alone, it's really hard also when we are worrying about our kids, or family. So give yourself a HUGE pat on the back.

    Hope the next run is much better, remember not to push the pace too hard, keep it steady, you can do it. I look forward to reading about it :-)

  • Thanks for the encouragement - I really need it at the moment.

    My daughter seems better today so fingers crossed she's over the worst of it.

    One thing though - I've woken up today and my quad muscles are aching so bad it's as if yesterday was the first exercise I've ever done. You know that really painful ache when you can't even bend without wincing. I can't believe after only missing a week my body has forgotten my previous fitness. Even more reason to keep going I suppose!

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