Fano 3 - Liverpool 7 - ignoring the new ABBA r... - Couch to 5K

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Fano 3 - Liverpool 7 - ignoring the new ABBA rule - Week 7 Run 2

33 Replies

I have to be honest with you in my last post, I lied, I said I wouldn't be back on the pista. But having had chats with Mr JCR we decided one more go at the pista before returning to the hills. So its 6, 30 today for the start. 6am and the bathroom is now down to 30 degrees, as Lucifer let up slightly yesterday. ABBA woke me up - Mamma Mia, which is how I feel about tackling this second run.

In the car down to the village, we are behind a bag lady on a bike. She is of indeterminate age, wearing shorts, a baggy top and flip flops. And her bike is loaded with bags everywhere - she is doing the recycling run and wobbles precariously with containers tied on with bungees and carrier bags wrapped around the handles. We watch with bated breath as she eventually brakes and unloads her plastic cargo. Thank heavens it wasn’t the glass run, that would have been carnage. But in actual fact we notice that Italians generally don't drink that much to do big bottle bank runs, so it's only Mr & Mrs JCR who do the bottle bank walk of shame! She starts up again, a bit of wobble and re-centering her gravity - off she goes, but her cycling is equally as wobbly without the rubbish as with it.

Today is my new opportunity to become a molto chic podista, I am wearing rather gorgeous sunglasses, a new running top and sporting a determination not to end up red and sweaty. Arrive at the pista, first part of my walk and I overtake a walker, he is about 75 I guess, with a shock of wavy hair reminiscent of George Michael in the Last Christmas video, but obviously not wearing the cheesy Christmas sweater. He looks cool. 1-0 to me. Second overtakee coming up she is young, bronzed and wearing earphones. 2-0. Uh oh Fano get one back, he is about 50 wearing clothes, (which after Sunday's male bikini wearers is a blessed relief). 2-1.

Mr Smooth interjects and I have to start running, slow and steady, taking a curve nicely and then amazing - another 2 overtakes. That's 4-1. On the back strait I am overtaken by a topless dreadlocked god. He has muscles on muscles. 4-2. Heading towards the tennis club, I spy some shade but it is in the cycling bit, not the walking bit, so an inward groan and I continue. Mr Smooth is suspiciously quiet nowadays, I am suspecting him of two-timing.

Reaching the half way bell and I get past two ladies chatting, 6-2. It’s getting quite warm now and the pista doesn’t really have any shade, so a quick slurp from the water bottle and I get overtaken by the human version of SpongeBob SquarePants. This man is a cube on legs, but my grief he is motoring, I almost get a backdraught when he goes past. That’s 6-3, but I get the final overtake on a lady chatting on her phone. 7-3 an away win for Liverpool.

However, with the new FIFA penalty taking rules, designed to stop the first penalty takers getting an unfair advantage, I realise that I can’t actually count any of my overtaking, because not one of my overtakes were runners. So I actually lost 0-3 as I was running, being overtaken by other runners.

I did my warm down walk, actually slowed down to a stop to watch with admiration as SpongeBob continued his sprinting, he really did have a low centre of gravity and his legs went like pistons. How on earth he managed to do 4 sets of sprints in this heat is beyond me. Oh and he continued to run afterwards when I was doing my cool down stretches.

So my statistics today:-

Got up earlier = +1 point

Didn't forget any kit = +1 point

Was wearing sunglasses = + 1 point

Overtook 7 people, non of whom realised they were in my race = - 7 points (you really can't count competitors who didn't know they were racing)

Got overtaken legitimately = - 3 points

Finished the run = +1 point

Was still salsa red = - 1 point

But took off 20 seconds off one of my km splits - it still glacially slow but not quite as bad = +1 point

So I am calling it a slightly dishonourable draw, definitely not a chic podista today, still looked like a salsa red tomato wearing sunglasses.

Ho hum , maybe next time. Chicness still awaits, but I am patient. One day I will be that Dulux shade of sorbet, my pony tail will swoosh and someone else (probably incredibly short-sighted) may just say, wow did you see that podista - doesn't she look English!

33 Replies

I love your posts!!! 😂

in reply toHelplessSpectator

Thanks a lot, it's fun writing them, as Mr JCR commented yesterday 'Your running isn't really as good as your writing' Harsh but fair!!! If it makes you smile then job done. I am a very lucky person overall, so passing on smiles is a nice thing to do.

Irishprincess profile image
IrishprincessGraduate

Sooo funny 😂

in reply toIrishprincess

Thanks a lot irishprincess.

bareliz profile image
bareliz

Haha. At least you are not getting overtaken by walkers, like me. Oh yes wouldn't it be lovely to run without going a deep shade of red? I am envious when I watch the pale faced runners go by, hardly out of breath. You are well on your way now Jan, sounding good and looking good by the description of your attire. Who'd have thought we'd have come this far?

in reply tobareliz

We have got this sorted, we will graduate with sparkly badges, we will drink that drink together and we will run together one day. That's a deal

IgaT profile image
IgaTGraduate

Congratulations on your run! Aren't we all salsa red during and after running? I am.

I love your running stories!

It makes me want to go running in the rain after work ;) You're my hero and motivator :) Thank you for that!

So IgaT, let me introduce to the Dulux colour chart, then you will see that red comes in many shades - at my worst I am Monarch - close to beetroot with a hint of brown. Salsa red my normal colour however one of our runners here Runningraspberrydiva has made raspberry diva her own colour...

We love shades of red, they show we are runners. And enjoy your run, and what a lovely thing to say that I am a motivator for you, how very kind of you. Go and do it, enjoy being part of the couch kicking community.

Runningraspberrydiva profile image
RunningraspberrydivaGraduate in reply to

Feel free to steal the raspberry diva colour if you wish 😂😂

Still feel I haven't managed to come down the scale from beetroot (or better still 🍆)

in reply toRunningraspberrydiva

I read somewhere that that particular vegetable emoji means something else entirely.... but I am an old non emoji literate runner

Runningraspberrydiva profile image
RunningraspberrydivaGraduate in reply to

Ooh I'm now intrigued as to what it means & have I made a big faux pas ??

in reply toRunningraspberrydiva

Well what does it look vaguely like? That may give you a clue or at least that was what I was told...

in reply to

Confirmed by urban dictionary in fact Grindr have a range of aubergines for various uses.... oops

61trying profile image
61tryingGraduate

Absolutely brilliant post. I'm so impressed by your determination and feel you are being far too hard on yourself. For me, overtaking any thing or anyone who is moving is definitely a point to me. In fact, I'm almost at the point of scoring against an inanimate object if it's moving in the breeze, so that's a number of trees losing out to me. Keep up the running and the wonderful posts.

in reply to61trying

Thanks 61trying, they weren't even sporty walkers though, they were just casual walkers happening to be doing it on a running track, so I really can't claim any credit. But despite the joking you do see some amazing people on fitness, like sponge bob for example he really ran like the wind, and it was inspiring to witness. Counting inanimate objects though I love that concept and trees being losers - really funny.

MrsT82 profile image
MrsT82

Funnily enough when I started my warm up walk yesterday I targeted 2 grandparents out walking with their young grandchildren on bikes. I did catch them before the end of the warm up but they were really quick! Need to pick some better races tomorrow. Always makes me laugh when I'm coming right up to someone and MJ tells me to slow down to a walk 😂

It's as though Mr Smooth knows... But we love him! But I love 61trying and the trees as losers... that is brilliantly done!

Tomas profile image
TomasGraduate

Loved the post. Thank you Jan! And I think you ought to claim at least 1/2 point for overtaking those who didn't realise they were in the race - their ignorance is not your fault ;)

in reply toTomas

Okay may have to re-do my scoring then...

Oldfloss profile image
OldflossAdministratorGraduate

Fabulous post you!!!

What a great run... :) You have done amazingly!!!

A salsa red tomato in sunglasses.. sounds perfect to me... Go You!!!

in reply toOldfloss

Thanks OF 3rd run on Thursday with the hill that kills.....

Oldfloss profile image
OldflossAdministratorGraduate in reply to

Ouchie! Embrace the hill... :)

Have to admit..on Sunday... I used the long one near me as a warm-up walk... of a mile!!! :)

Bonkersbrit profile image
BonkersbritGraduate

Canadian scoring system for overtaking-

Mobility scooters -3 points

Dogs- same number of points as they have legs

Snails - 1 point, except 2 on Mondays

Fellow beetroots- 1 point for each shade darker than you they appear

Moose - DONT! Never have a moose behind you, are you mad?

in reply toBonkersbrit

I see you thought about this one long and hard... I may have to adopt it and think about recalculating my scores

Slinkymalinki profile image
SlinkymalinkiGraduate

Great post! With the grim weather here, I'm going to start awarding points for overtaking slugs on the canal towpath!

in reply toSlinkymalinki

Slugs are legitimate targets for overtaking 😀

lardofale profile image
lardofaleGraduate

Fantastic stuff! Love the scoreboard and the abba analogy, expect plagiarism on an epic scale!

LiisaM profile image
LiisaMGraduate

Wonderful writing! I was thinking I'd like to read books written by you!

in reply toLiisaM

Thanks Liisa - it is very kind of you to say so. It seems I have discovered something alongside running that I enjoy. I'm thinking the books wouldn't be that interesting though - just me and running. Not exactly the Harry Potter franchise.... but thanks for your kind words.

Polly2810 profile image
Polly2810Graduate

Thanks that cheered up my lunch time!!

in reply toPolly2810

Pleasure as ever....

Reluctance2wayoflife profile image
Reluctance2wayoflifeGraduate

I'm just catching up after being on hols for a few days and enjoying your posts too Hidden I think of Bridget Jones when I read your posts but I think you're funnier....definitely think about publishing, I'd buy 😊

in reply toReluctance2wayoflife

Thanks Reluctance2wayoflife it's very kind of you to say so. And I hope you enjoyed your holiday. How about a quid? Joking!

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