So after 10+ years in aspheric lenses ( glasses) for some reason my eyes now are not okay wearing them, after 4 months of appointments and several glasses... The news I didn't want has happened.
I'm never going to look normal, attractive or nice ever again and, my partner isn't sure he'll stay, we both didn't think my appearance was going to change so drastically so it's a huge shock and if there's no attraction there, it won't work.
It's so heartbreaking to know if only if stayed looking normal? He'd still be attracted to me and we'd of had a future with our 5 year old daughter, who has my eyesight 😩.
I feel like the worst Mum ever, I don't want her to have to go through this ever herself.
I'm feeling extreme sadness, anger, pain and possible loss of the person I love and my future. Nobody around me can relate, nobody knows what to say to me family included.
They just say you'll get through it.
I'm in therapy obviously but it's a lot happening very quickly and I'm in early stages so not even scratched the surface yet of 20 years of bdd and trauma, and I'm not finding it that helpful currently.
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Jmarieee
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OMG, I'm so sorry. I obviously don't understand the full implications of what you're going through. Is it that you will have to wear pebble glasses? Please do explain - I'd love to understand.Regarding your partner, surely he loves YOU, whatever you look like. I think your worry is the BDD talking (I understand that).
You are more than your appearance (and your appearance is beautiful to everyone else). Just continue to be the amazing woman you are, and a loving partner and mother.
My thoughts are with you, and my deepest wish is that you find peace of mind. xxx
Thank you, unfortunately the outcome is getting worse every time I go to the opticians, they're pulling at straws themselves.
My eyes don't want to work together anymore, I shouldn't need spherical after 11+ years in aspheric. But they've said I may have to go to them and they're sorry.
Because they know how awful they look and the weight of them is horrid.
I am so anxious and sad, I feel like I'm going to look so different in the blink of an eye, and I don't know how to cope with any of it, I don't look nice with glasses off either and my turn is so bad now it goes right into my nose, so it's not as if I can just remove my glasses and look nice.
At 33 I'm having to accept a lot and lose a lot, and I thought I was just going for a routine eye test and maybe picking a smaller shape frame.
I'm so sorry. It sounds like nothing more can be done regarding your eyesight (but still try not to give up - keep searching for answers). What you need most now is help and support to help you with what you're going through. Can your doctor help? Can you get counselling? Even if you're not religious, maybe prayers from a church. If you can get counselling from a church, they care more about how you are feeling, whereas ordinary counselling tries to help you to overcome and move on. Both can help. Thinking of you. xxx
Been having private therapy, but it isn't helping me feel any better.
I just feel I'll be ugly and look horrible forever now and I don't feel any joy or hope for myself, I feel like I'm just going to survive fory daughters sake, but not actually enjoy my own life. X
Oh God - as a fellow BDD sufferer I SO understand and sympathise. Anyone would feel bad with what you're going through, but it's worse for you. You seem such a lovely, sensitive person, and I know you have so much to give to your daughter and to the world in general. You said therapy isn't helping - a lot depends on the therapist. Is it worth trying other things, like maybe a church counselling service (I went to one - it was free, and a great help, because all the woman did was listen). Is this mostly about your appearance, or is it also worry about your eyes? Is it worth reaching out to an organisation that deals with sight problems, and maybe talking to people who have similar problems, and asking how they cope.My only other suggestion is to try and get help for the BDD. But having therapy is a start - just say everything you feel, however silly it might feel. I do so wish you all the best - I'll be thinking of you. Take care. xxx
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