Doctors Phone Calls & Decision’s Wish Did Not Have To Make.

Had call of dad’s hospital doctor TO go see them re update.

Turn’s out shadow on dad’s lung is something to worry about HOSPITAL want to discharge dad WITH provido of further test in future.

They asked if I could take dad to appointments.

Sounds strait forward enough but dad as lost ability to get in out of my car as well as using spoons forks.

Sure this hospital transport BUT would appointment vist’s really benefit dad’s health.

And answer is very unlikely given he’s advancing dementia Alzheimer’s

So next day or two dad’s coming home WITH issues that took him AE put down to advancing condition.

Feeling well can’t really say apart from numb and am I really strong enough to make these decision’s

Today had to leave hospital given my own health issues I.e hot sweats anxiety.

Defo makes you think about own health and future I would face given my own health issues and numb arms

Today at hospital had to get nurse to open bottle of milk GIVEN lack of strength in my arms SHE opened it with such ease HELPED contributed to my own health anxiety.

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Oh I really feel for you JeffAjaxSmith. So sorry to hear of this new development and all the problems that go with it. I completely agree that it's very easy for hospital staff to pass on responsibility for getting your dad to appointments and not at all easy to accomplish, especially when, as you say, you've got your own health challenges. You are coping with one thing after another.

As always you plough on through all the obstacles put in your way, but I hope you do remember to look after yourself too. For your own good and well-being as well as dad's.

Are you strong enough to make the decisions being asked of you? Well I'd certainly say so. I know you justifiably get really fed up but you are honestly a rock for your dad and somehow you always seem to find that extra bit of strength to keep going for him.

Very best wishes to you both, once again, and keep strong.

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Hi Callendersgal all this hospital stuff is giving me anxiety phobia or might be suffering male menopause.

I looked at dad today I thought how lucky he was really AS he as family who cares then I seen nurse open milk carton with ease THEN I thought WHO going to look after me.

Then hot sweats panic started and had to go get some fresh air.

I don’t have kids or wife so guess that’s why painic as being subject of community hospital care WELL if this such a thing when if I need it.

Fills me with dread fear anxiety especially given what have seen Know

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Yes JeffAjaxSmith, I think that caring for someone else can make you wonder and worry for yourself in the future.

I honestly think it's best not to dwell on it too much and just take a day at a time. Events often turn out far differently to the way we expect them to, and given how much time, energy and love you've poured into looking after your dad, it would be good to think that when the time comes, someone will step forward to help you. And at least you have an insight into what a struggle it can be to access help from outside agencies and how much of a fight you might expect to get it.

But meantime, just concentrate on being as well as you can and continue the wonderful caring you do for your dad.

Best wishes.

[katieoxo60]

Not good news then Jeff, still feel you need to take care of your health so you are strong for your dad. You cannot change what will happen in your dads health you can only support him with help from the NHS ect. Take consulation in the fact that you have done your best for him at the risk of your own wellbeing, times come to live each day as it comes and hope for the best. Take care and take any help you can get

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Hi Jeff,

Has your dad got a social worker? If so why not chat about this whole issue with them or else see your doctor. My husband has dementia and cancer and our family had a talk with the medics about this. We came to the conclusion that further treatment for his cancer was not sensible, he doesn't need to go through it. He just has basic treatment now to keep him as well as possible, Also the question of NHS transport - don't do it!! We have seen people waiting for hours on end for the transport to arrive, it is too distressing for someone with dementia.

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Hi Exhaustedwife

Was talking about hospital transport and your right is pits BUT think dad is going to have to go for scan SO condition could be managed at home.

Hospital could not do test as snowed under so got to be done as out patient.

I thought in patients emergency had priority but apparently that’s bushed too.

[Rienij70]

Sorry to hear about your problems. I really feel for you. I do know what it is like. I am carer to my husband with vascular dementia. And to put it mildly the only help that appears to be out there are a lot of leaflets and phone numbers! I myself have got cancer, and I tried to get emergency cover for him, as I needed an operation. Apparently emergency cover doesn’t apply to a planned op. But at the same time they would like 4 days notice! How does that work? I think the problem is they just haven’t the people available to lend practical help. Have you tried your local volunteer car service? They will take you to appointments and wait for you. It is possible depending on your circumstances to claim for the cost. Good luck with it all and all the best with your dad and you. Rienij