We have finally had a home assessment done for husbands mobility issues and they have said he needs a hospital bed. It has subsequently become apparant that hospital beds can only be placed downstairs.
We have a small lounge/diner open planned with the kitchen, so having a bed downstairs really isn't an option without completely irradicating our home life.
We would need to lose the dining table and chairs, for a start. Probably the corner of the room where I work from home too.
But it would also mean that if hubs was tired (generally goes to bed about 7pm), daughter and I would need to go upstairs (we don't have TV's in the bedrooms), so that he can sleep.
And it means that he would have no privacy at all.
We couldn't have friends over because they would be in his "bedroom".
Has anyone gone through this and a. managed to get social services to agree to the bed going upstairs or b. have any suggestions as to how we mentally and emotionally deal with this reduction in our lives?
The way I feel right now, putting him in a residential home seems like a better option, out 9 year old has been through so muchvwith all this already, i just don't want to make her life any harder right now.
I have also applied for council housing and social services are looking to see if they can help in that regard, but until then, I don't know what to do for the best.
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mrsstrider
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Is your bathroom upstairs?If the beds upstairs would he be able to go up and down stairs safely?
Can your daughter give up her bedroom and put her bed in your room?
Can you apply for a stair lift?
Hospital beds are heavy and bulky, but there's nothing stopping you moving it upstairs after it's been delivered, keep in mind though that it might not actually go up the stairs.
Unfortunately it looks like your becoming a full time carer and your life's changed, it might be time to enquire if a hospice can get involved.
Read this post, it might help you decide about the future.
The bathroom is upstairs and my daughter has already given up her room, she is in with me and he is in her bed.
If the bed is downstairs, I still need to get him upstairs to bathe, if the bed goes upstairs, I would still need to get him down for the day.
To complicate matters, my landlord intends to put the house on the market next month with us as sitting tennants. But that doesn't guarantee that the new owners will let us continue living here, so potentially could be looking at a no fault eviction notice in a few months on top of all of this.
I can't tell you how much wishful thinking is going on about getting council housing to tie in with that. At least then I could take a carers break from work and know that the rent is covered,local housing allowance in £575 and average private rent in this area is £1200, so couldn't afford to give up work if still in private. Plus, I don't know that anyone would take us as tennants if we need adaptations to the property.
Hi, have you spoken to the councils housing department about the situation? It sounds as if social services are on the case with that. Citizens advice might also be able to help with advice on housing and in work benefits.
Re the bed- I hear what Roy is saying about moving the bed upstairs but hospital beds are very heavy and bulky with electronics attached. They have to be plugged in and set up when they are delivered. I know people who have chosen to have theirs in the main room so that their lived one was able to be with everyone else rather than shut away, but you’ve got to think about your daughter.
When we reached the hospital bed stage Mum wasn't up to bathing. That was the stage where carers started coming in and washed her in bed. You may find that bathing is not an issue.
Have you spoken to your local hospice? They are very knowledgeable about the kind of situation you’re in and may have some suggestions. They can also support your daughter through this difficult time.
I also think you need to get the community nursing team involved because they organised our hospital bed, carers and occupational health. They’ve seen it all and gave us brilliant advice.
Sometimes people can go into a care home for respite care just for a couple of weeks. Social services can advise on that. It might give you the breathing space to find out more and make informed decisions.
I am sorry with what you are going through, and I can re emphasise what Readlots says about contacting hospice, as they are wonderful. Get in touch with them and they will do an assessment for you, and also help with any questions you have. They have been brilliant with me and my husband, and have sorted everything out for us. My husband has been in hospice since December and he is only coming home as this is where he wants to be in his final days.
As for the hospital bed, I have just had one delivered for my husband who is coming home (he has no mobility whatsoever and is now on bed baths, with a catheter and permanent drain). His bedroom is upstairs (which is also where our bathroom is) and when they deliver the bed the metal base is folded up and once in the room of choice it is put together. It is not delivered as a complete, made up bed. Obviously this is dependent on the type of stairs you have (width and space wise), the size of the bedroom you will be using and you will need an electric point as the bed is electric, and if you have a pressure mattress this will need to be plugged in as well. You will also need space for any extra aids your husband may require (commode, walker etc). Hospice will arrange a home visit with the Occupational Therapist to check what is best for everyone involved and what is feasible with the space you have available, as well as your husband's needs. I also have community nurses coming in three times a day to help with bathing, drainage and medication. When we did the initial home visit they were concerned about the stairs we have (I had an extra hand rail installed and I was looking at having a stair lift put in) but as my husband is now completely bed bound, this is no longer an issue for us.
They do prefer hospital beds to be downstairs, as this makes it easier for access should your husband need to be moved, or in case of an emergency.
Hospice are a life saver, and have really helped me so much. And you can self refer, which is what I had to do as my GP was not much help. Look for your nearest hospice (I am not sure where you are living in the UK) and they will have a self referral form you can complete. If you get stuck, message me and I will help you. They step in immediately and answer any questions you have. Your daughter will benefit hugely as they have support for her as well.
I know this is a daunting time for you all, and having everything else to worry about does not help at all.
All of the best and as Roy1955 says, you are not alone x
how do yoou get a hospital bed at home this is one of my worries as I regularly need help sitting up, getting out of bed, and being able to raise the bed or lower, pull myself up after my transplant is a big issue for me atm, been told they are hellishly expensive, where do we start?
My husband was discharged from hospital with no care package or forward treatment plan after 6 weeks, so I went to social services. They came out and did an assessment of his mobility and determined that due to the ascites on his abdomen and general lack of mobility, he needed a hospital bed, along with a commode, zimmer frame, bath board, perching stool and leg lifter. They put the request in and we had it confirmed pretty quick after that.
This is in Kent, so not sure how it works elsewhere. But pretty sure wherever you are, it's going to be a fight for you, that's all I ever seem to be doing right now.
Thank you, that is a great help, atm my stomach, legs, feet are hugely swollen up, been tolld this may reduce with the new liver, but for now, even getting 3 feet to the loo is a problem. Still improving daily, transplant has been wonderful, atm I look a bit like Frrankenstein with all the mettal stitches holding me toogether, but positivity😀
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