Bacon crispies, cheese balls, chipsticks and other maize-based snacks plus Pringles (other shaped chips are available).... cheese and onion rolls.... when you’ve spent all week on SlimFast it was just too tempting. Along with alcohol-free or zero alcohol cider, and a 2am finish with friends I only get to see about twice a year. Not the best prep for ParkRun.
Dog woke me up at 7:15. Thinks ‘ugh. I’m too late to eat and drink now, then I’ll feel sick, I won’t go.’
(Walks down the stairs with knees more functional than they’ve been for the last 3 years)
‘I need coffee.... and a drink of water... and not going... ‘
(Has half the normal size mug of coffee, and sips the squash anyway)
‘Let’s sort out your breakfast, dog, then I’ll check social media because I have plenty of time because I’m not going...’
(Notices how easy it is to move and stretch while feeding dog, picks up phone and checks this forum before Facebook)
‘Aaaaw, look at that! Everyone’s prepping for Parkrun, good on ya! Shame I’m not going this morning. But I volunteered to help clean up, so loads of time before I have to be there anyway.’
(Notices coffee and squash has gone down fine and starts wondering if I should go before the start, just so they know I am there to help pack away)
‘Ok, I may as well sort out my playlist for my run tomorrow while I sit here....’
(Oooooooo..... wonder what that one is like to run to?)
‘Time to get dressed, what’s comfy?’
(Puts on running leggings and top, and cap, may as well put on my wristband as well, and my running trainers...)
‘I might do a gentle jog round, as I’m dressed, but I’m not going to run’
(Walks the warm up beforehand anyway)
‘I’ll stick near the 45min pacer’
(Too slow - not waiting)
‘Pffft! That’s nowhere near a 40min pace, pace lady, that’s a 35min if ever I saw one’
(Keeps up anyway)
‘I’m still just jogging, I’m not trying for a PB or anything’
(You’ve set off too quick, but let’s hang in there and see)
‘Ha! The 40min pacer is having to slow down.... What do you mean the stopwatch has accidentally reset?! Why have you stopped?! Why are you waiting’
(Keep running.... damn it, I was on for a PB there!.... run run run....)
‘Why volunteer to be a 40min pacer if you want to set off like Mo Farah...’
(Oh, it’s the top of the slope already...)
‘I don’t care if two little grey-haired ladies overtake me 10 yards before the finish’
(Oh FFS!)
‘I’m not fussed about the time’
(Why won’t this damn Apple Watch stop the damn workout! Aaaaaarrrgggghhg! Stop will you???? Finally!!! Now I have no idea what my time was!)
‘Ok I did this! Wow! Oh, so pleased!’
(Ok, I did this! Wow! Oh, so pleased! And compared with where my head was at 8am... the PB doesn’t matter one bit TBH!)
.... got a PB 😱 by 2 seconds 🤣💪
Unexpected turn of events 
I went with Mo!
