Comparing with others 😔

[ClareO65]

So... I try, I really do but I can’t help comparing myself to others. It makes me feel rubbish- I’m not fast and my progress is slowing. I keep telling myself how far I’ve come etc. but I still keep comparing. A friend just returned to running after 18 months off and proudly posted her 3K time. Straight away I’m looking mine up 🙄 It’s not like I’m training to compete so what’s it all about? Natural instinct? I’ve got to stop!!

[Langley-Loper Graduate10]

I know exactly what you mean. I started C25k with my 15 year old son. I am 49 - imagine how depressing that was!

However, as time went on I stopped competing with him as it was an unfair comparison. I could hear him behind me struggling to run "slowly" but learnt to ignore it. Instead I got competitive with myself. Could i knock a few seconds off my time? Could I get to the next house before turning?

Also look at trends rather than one-off times/distances as we all have off days and good days so it is better to look week to week or even month to month rather than run to run.

Enjoy YOUR running and sod the others!

[ClareO65 in reply to Langley-Loper]

Thanks- I need more of this sort of talk!

[Hidden]

A certain amount of comparison can be healthy, but too much is defeating. Concentrate on your own improvement. I find it goes in cycles. Im slower than I was a while back, but Im going further. Im never going to be fast as im too old and was never very fast in my youth. But I can run for nearly two hours without stopping or walking, which I think is ok, even if it’s slow. I think you have to work with your body type and personal abilities and hone those. Faster isnt always better xx

[ClareO65 in reply to Hidden]

You are right. And I am genuinely pleased for others but I keep putting pressure on myself to be better! I’d love to run for 2 hours non stop. Oh hold on I’m comparing again 😂😂

[Hidden in reply to ClareO65]

Lol, it takes me 1hr 50min to run 11k. Im sure you would go further in that time.x

[Sqkr]

I am one of a group of four friends who all started running at the same time from nothing, each with different motivations and backgrounds. We are all doing the same 10k this weekend, and have all ended up in different starting groups. The full rainbow! We all have the same gripes and highs and lows, so compare those, but there's no point doing a direct comparison on times and things as we are all so different. I'm slight, my pal H is about six foot. A does yoga so can bend in twenty places at once. We're just entirely different people. I think it's human to make comparisons, and it's fun to do so, but it's important to accept that everyone is so different it's madness to do it in any serious way. As above, I get my competition fix by competing with myself (...and occasionally secretly with my boyfriend who doesn't know I have found him on Strava. But that's another story.), I'm the only person I can directly compare myself to!

You might think your progress is slower now, but you can bet you are way stronger than when you started. Running is about the full package of skills, not just speed, and everytime you go out you're improving in a multitude of ways.

Edit: Cor I am a bit verbose, aren't I.

[Fionn42]

Quit wallowing! You’re already a major achiever and far better than the majority of the population because you run regularly - regardless of the time or distance so you deserve to give yourself a pat on the back for that! 👏🏻🏃‍♀️🎖🏅👏🏻😊.

I know how easy it is to beat yourself up for not being faster or achieving a certain time but it really doesn’t matter a jot. What matters is that you do it and enjoy it. End of!

[Rammy75 Graduate10]

Remember - your ‘slow’ is somebody else’s ‘fast’!

[Hidden in reply to Rammy75]

Yep, probably mine!

[misswobble Graduate10]

Yes you Have!

[ClareO65]

Thank you all. I absolutely do need to quit wallowing ☺️ My goal was to get to 5K and then keep doing this regularly. I don’t know where this competition thing has come from but I’m going to stop. If I can better my goal to get to 10k (at 8k so far) then I’m an over achiever ☺️👍🏼👌🏼

[Fionn42 in reply to ClareO65]

You are, you are, you so are!! 😊😊