Denial

Just saw some photos taken of me recently. I usually avoid the camera. Was so painful to see how large I have become. Why is it always so shocking? I used to be thin, so perhaps I am in denial. Stuck in some bad habits....drinking and eating to deal with high stress life, skipping exercising. Always saying I will start again tomorrow. Feel so ashamed. So. Ashamed. Need to change my habits, and my low self esteem. What has worked for all of you in changing habits, and losing weight? Thanks.....