Its only 3 months since mum died from Dementia but I am getting bad dreams about how she was so sad frightened and confused and how i couldn't rescue her.
I also got really upset at an innocent passing remark by a very dear friend. And it all came out. A grief fireball.
Has anyone any experience of the same
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Written by
Soobeedoo
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I would think this is because you haven't had time to process you dear Mum's loss and it's weighing heavily on your mind, which is only natural as it's still early days and everything is very vivid in your mind.
Regarding your friends remark, you're super sensitive as anyone would be after losing your Mum, I'm sure your friend understands.
What you are feeling is the guilt because you, nor anyone else can fix dementia. My mother in law had it, and I was her sole caregiver for the last 8 years of her life. I felt the same after she passed. The thing is, you have to learn to let that guilt go. You did all you could and she knows that. The dreams are you wishing you could have done more, but you did do everything possible. She is out of pain, in a better place and it's time for you to understand this and let yourself rest and be at peace knowing you did all you could for her. She loves you for that and wishes you to be at peace knowing that she is also. The comment that upset you was probably from someone who can't relate and understand the situation. I got plenty of those too. They have not walked where we have and can't even begin to get the depth of the situations caregivers face. Let that go and know, from someone who truly understands and knows, you did all you could. Be well and at peace with yourself!
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