Living with genital herpes: I had what I soon found... - BASHH

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Living with genital herpes

Pepper1974 profile image
9 Replies

I had what I soon found out to be possibly my first herpes outbreak about 5 months ago . I had the most extreme pain passing urine and pains down my legs. After a few days a few ulcers appeared and I gave up with the doctors telling me I had a urine infection and went to a gum clinic . I was devastated thought my life was over but so pleased to get treatment and be in less pain . The ulcers cleared quickly and the urine pain after a few days but the pains in my buttocks legs and Pelvis went on for weeks ! Now just like to talk to people who have suffered and still suffer with the pain of herpes .

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Pepper1974 profile image
Pepper1974
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Tulip2016 profile image
Tulip2016

Hi pepper, I am in my early 20's I was with a guy who was sleeping around and he knew he had genital herpes for years and had passed it on to previous girlfriends (I only found this out after I caught it and split with him) my first outbreak was about 5 months ago.

It started with a small sore and then after a few weeks becoming very sore In-between my bum cheeks above my anus and it was also very itchy. I remember waking up in the night itching like crazy so I got the partner to have a look at it and he convinced me it was fine it was just a rash and nothing to worry about and to use some sudocrem.

A few days later I had gone back to my mums as he convinced me he needed some space so I headed back to my mums, that night the rash was getting worse and I started to feel sore In the vaginal area so I decided to examine myself a little closer ... It was then I relalised this is just no little rash.

I woke up and the rash had spread everywhere and I was in agony, I will never be able to express the pain I was in I had taken painkillers but nothing seemed to help the pain was so extreme it was in my anus, all over my vagina and I just wanted to die. I couldn't urinate and I had constipation from where it had spread in the Anus area. I ended up getting rushed to hospital in an ambulance where they gave me very strong painkillers, tablets to make me poo and medication to clear the breakout and let me go home.

From that day onwards I felt my whole life had been destroyed, I still feel that way to be honest. I haven't spoken with anyone that has this also yet and anyone that has tried to explain it has made it sound like its a dreadful thing to have.

I'm still trying to get my head around it all really, I feel like I will never be able to have a relationship again, how do you explain this to a guy at my age?

Thank you for reading and if you have any questions Fire away,

Take care X

CJ123 profile image
CJ123 in reply to Tulip2016

Sent the reply to the wrong story but here you go!

Hiya! so ive seen this post is a few months ago so you might not need my help anymore but I am in my early 20s and I had to explain this to a boyfriend, well someone I was seeing. By far the most shit scary thing there is do to! I had my best friend on the phone awaiting his reply. So it is a huge risk in telling someone, you need to trust them with your biggest secret and also for me feel the risk of rejection. I advise not to have sex until it comes to the point where your both ready and you can trust him with it. It crossed my mind to not say and always use a condom but your still putting someones health at risk so I braved up and told him, over text haha. Fortunately I was lucky and he was beyond lovely and kept it a secret and I'll forever be grateful to him for that! Shit thing is it has to be done and it sucks but atleast you'll find the right guy by telling someone this! silver linings ey! Need a talk or any help let me know!

Dancingdrummer profile image
Dancingdrummer

Hi I have been recently diagnosed at the age of 47..I am absolutely devastated and trying to get my head around it. My 1st outbreak was 6 weeks ago and I have nevervhadcpain like it ..was on par with giving birth. It took 2 weeks to have any kind of relief and the symptoms to subside to then get another outbreak.. Both were not only painful due to the blisters but also the horrendous pain in my legs back and around my genital area. I am now on 6 months treatment to try and help but the hardest thing is coming to terms with it ..

I was with a guy who had the virus for 30 years and hadn't had a breakout in a long time .. I went to the GU clinic when we first got together this year to find out information and also have a health check .i had been single for some years .All came back clear and took on board their advice . Sadly it wasn't enough as I was to find out. I have no idea if I had the virus for years that was dormant and my recent bout of asthma and my Lichen Plans made me more susceptible to it although he had no symptoms ..he has since called it a day and I am now left not only dealing with the physical side but also the emotional part of it. Xx pepper stay strong sweetheart your not in this alone ...yes it is not fair for any of us but we can deal with this together . get as much information as you can xx

marialabo profile image
marialabo

hi i was diagnosed at the age of 37, i usually shave down below and i was thinking it got infected, but then i was very worried because my vaginal area was extremely sore, i can't walk properly for two weeks, i was constipated and i don't why maybe bacoz of antiviral medication i was taking, this condition is very devastating. i was traumatised to have sex again its like i have lost the interest due to a traumatic pain i experienced. yet i don't loose hope nothing is impossible when we believe. I'm taking food supplements to boost immune system and being picky with the food i eat, taking care of my health, avoiding stressful situations and managing it as well to avoid recurrent episodes.

CJ123 profile image
CJ123

Hiya! so ive seen this post is a few months ago so you might not need my help anymore but I am in my early 20s and I had to explain this to a boyfriend, well someone I was seeing. By far the most shit scary thing there is do to! I had my best friend on the phone awaiting his reply. So it is a huge risk in telling someone, you need to trust them with your biggest secret and also for me feel the risk of rejection. I advise not to have sex until it comes to the point where your both ready and you can trust him with it. It crossed my mind to not say and always use a condom but your still putting someones health at risk so I braved up and told him, over text haha. Fortunately I was lucky and he was beyond lovely and kept it a secret and I'll forever be grateful to him for that! Shit thing is it has to be done and it sucks but atleast you'll find the right guy by telling someone this! silver linings ey! Need a talk or any help let me know!

mandylou91 profile image
mandylou91

Hi,

Yesterday I was diagnosed with Herpes. I am 25 and in a brand new relationship, my symptoms started off with me feeling a little sore downstairs with some pain when I peed, the next day I developed a fever and loss of appetite, I felt sick and I could not bear to wee. It's now day 4 of my first out break and I am bed ridden, I'm on Genfura for the water infection and I'm also on Aciclovir for the herpes. I cannot walk as the burning pain is too intense, when I wee I scream and cry in pain, my whole body aches, my fever is still here. I've been taking medication for 3 days yet nothing seems to have died down even in the slightest! When I told my boyfriend about me having herpes he was so supportive and said that it changes nothing for which I am greatful!

I am so new to this and I'm currently feeling as though my life has been ruined! Would love to hear from anyone who has any suggestions on how to deal with the first outbreak as I don't feel like I can go on like this anymore!

in reply to mandylou91

Hello,

I just wanted to say to all those who have been diagnosed recently that your lives are not over. Herpes is a very common disease and has been around for centuries (or Millenia).

I was diagnosed with HPV 2 genital herpes and HPV 1 genital herpes as my previous boyfriend had both types. He didn't know at the time he had HPV 2 (genital herpes) and we started having unprotected sex after a trip to the sexual health clinic and after all our tests had come back ok. Of course, they don't test for herpes. I was diagnosed twice. I felt like my life was over and I felt even worse when we split after 6 years as I now had to tell my next partner.

I am now 37 and have been living with herpes for 10 years. Sometimes I have 3 outbreaks a month, but 1 a month is normal. I have found another partner and telling him wasn't a problem as he is wonderful. Someone worth your time won't worry about it. We have been together 3 years and he hasn't contracted it as we are always careful.

I have tried many different things. At one point I took 9 100mg Vit C tablets per day and this totally cleared my herpes. I didn't have outbreaks for months. But, taking that much Vit C is not healthy. I now take 3 100mg a day and also a lysine supplement. I have found that my diet is a major factor. Eat foods low in Arginine but higher in Lysine and take the supplement. This should help. Also, Acyclivir just as the tingles start.

Don't be down. Be strong. Don't feel ashamed as it is such a common disease. Your life isn't over. Research food indexes for lysine-arginine content as I believe this works.

I hope this helps

Geniusdeb profile image
Geniusdeb

I was diagnosed when I was 20, I'm now 54 and have not given it a 2nd thought.

Originally contracted it from a long term boyfriend who it seems was unfaithful. Initial episode required hospitalisation and catheterisation due to the pain along with regular GUM visits but subsequent and very infrequent recurrent episodes are self managed with salt baths, early nights, cotton underwear and no tights or trousers and a lignocaine based cream. I'm over the psychological issues because otherwise I'd be hung up over something I can't do anything about. I try to keep my stress under control and my health buoyant to reduce recurrences. Had a healthy baby at age 27 and active sex life so just deal with it when it happens.

Im 40 and have just been diagnosed with my first bout of herpes...to say I'm devastated is an understatement...the pain had been excruciating...have been given aciclovir 2 days ago... this morning woke up after finally getting some sleep to aching pains the top of both legs :/ started reading these posts and thought at least I'm not the only one but then as i carried on reading seeing everyone having reoccuring bouts has again devastated me.

Feeling really down with all this. :(

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