Autism Mental Health Support (UK)?

[PurpleND]

I use to access a mental health cafe who no longer can meet my needs/reasonable adjustments due to policy change.

I am struggling to work out where to turn for mental health (no crisis based) support in a way that is suitable for someone with additional needs. I find most of the mental health options available - crisis lines, Samaritans, SHOUT, CBT is all designed for the neurotypical and doesn't work for me. I feel trapped and any advice or suggestions (including self help approaches) would be amazing... Thank you in advance.

[guineapigbridge]

I can really relate to this. When you mention to these services any disabilities like autism or fatigue related physical ones for example, they do not change or make any adjustments, they just say sorry about that and carry on as they are. There is a local video chat for me but I find it very difficult .. it's not their fault, but I have very little family and support network, so when I hear them talk about their families or triggers me and makes me feel worse. Not their fault at all but counter productive obviously if it's making me feel worse rather than better. DM message me if you want the details so that I don't have to post publically the area I live in . If you ever want to give eachother support (non professional I know but better than nothing) please feel free to reach out

[guineapigbridge in reply to guineapigbridge]

And then straight away below people talk about their mum's and seeking family support. Some of us don't have that. Different if I hadn't already said it in the comment directly above. How can people expect others to make reasonable adjustments when they aren't willing to do it when speaking to others themselves? Not the posters fault, but disappointed by the other replier. It is always a knife to the heart when people say to go to trusted family and friends. What if you don't have that?

[NotJim]

Hi PurpleND,

Sorry to hear you’re struggling with mental health. I’ve been there and it can be more difficult finding help that suits us when ASD is involved.

(I think this would come under self-help suggestions)

I don’t know the situation with your MH of course, but based on my own experiences I’ve found developing coping strategies to help with anxiety, negative feelings and responding to intrusive thoughts has been helpful.

These are ways that I know help to calm me down if i’m in a bad space. This can include rationalising the situation to myself (as well as seeking trusted family or friends who I know can help offer a different perspective. I’m very good at thinking purely in black and white, so I know I sometimes need a neurotypical person like my mum to help me work through my response).

If i’m overwhelmed mentally I find it’s important to make sure I can remove myself to somewhere that feels calm and safe so I have somewhere to process things. By giving myself time to process my feelings and allowing myself to think them through, thinking about why i’m feeling the way I am, considering why i’m responding like this, I can then try to think about what would help me feel better.

I’m a strong believer in finding ways of vocalising how we feel. It doesn’t always have to be words, or always spoken to someone else. Sometimes writing things down helps give clarity to things. But that said, speaking to someone you trust and can rely on is always always worthwhile. It’s very normal not to want to burden people or draw attention to ourselves by speaking about what’s going on for us, but the people who care for us wouldn’t want us to be suffering in silence. Having a chat doesn’t fix everything in one go of course, but it can help lift one of the rocks off our backs.

The other thing which is often said but i do find helpful is making sure you’re able to physically take care of yourself too. I’ve found i know i’m over doing things if my personal hygiene starts to be neglected for example. I know i’ll feel better if I can encourage myself to be brave and take a shower, cos it feels much nicer after. Trying to keep to a reasonable sleep schedule and doing small things like sipping water, eating etc., are all good ways to help manage yourself. Mental health takes up a huge amount of energy but looking after our physical selves can be a small boost i’ve found.

There’s also things that will be more specific to you, like special interests that you know can help make you happy (e.g., i’m very interested in film extras) that can give you a gentle boost when you’re feeling low.

A key thing that can help is to try and become aware of when your mind is in a negative downward spiral. This is when the negative thoughts feed one into another and you start to feel like you can’t think of any positive alternatives. Being able to recognise how you’re thinking, and when you might be prone to slip into something like this, can help because when you can recognise that you’re l thinking these things, you can gently start challenging these thoughts. It might go something like…

Negative thought “I can’t face tomorrow, i’m really scared and i’m alone”

Possible response: “But I know I’ve felt like this before. But it didn’t turn out as bad as I thought”.

There’s also a breathing technique which i found helpful when I’m feeling overwhelmed or panicking, where you breath in for 4, hold for 4, and release for 4. Doing this for about 10 minutes or more can help lower the heart rate and get oxygen to your brain.

The thing is with mental health is that it’s never a linear journey. It has peaks and troughs, ups and downs. There will be times when things feel pretty ok, and others when you hit a really low patch. We have to be patient and gentle with ourselves, as if you’re looking after a dear friend who’s struggling.

I never thought i’d have a major mental breakdown until i did when I was 15. They wanted me in a private hospital. And at that point I had no concept i’d get better again. I wouldn’t have been able to imagine things being better but here and now, things are. (I’m still not always a hundred percent but it’s peaks and troughs). It taught me that there are ways out of what can feel like the worst kinds of places, even if at the time it really doesn’t feel like it.

We might not realise things are changing for the better in fact, until one day we look back weeks, months or even years later and see actually things are a lot different. And that’s always a nice day.

Sorry for the long message(!) I really hope you feel better in yourself and wish you the very best.