Techniques to manage autism and anxiety

[Rugby3]

Does anyone have any techniques that will help me with a party weekend! Any things to hold/ play with or breathing techniques or anything that could help I will give it ago Please help if any ideas

[Tronsformer]

Hi Rugby,

Totally empathise with you as I know exactly what you’re going through. It’s great that you’re looking for solutions rather than avoid the party which is the biggest thing for me.

Tips: Breathing is a great one, if there is any distraction you can give your mind that’ll be helpful. The best one is someone to talk to you, it takes your mind if things and also fits in with the partt vibe. I struggle with a ton with this as I over talk due to nervousness, but having a few topics in your mind which you can steer the conversation to might help.

Taking regular breaks will help just to get out of the space and calm your mind. Toilet breaks, fresh air breaks. One thing I’ve used in the past is arrange a point of contact beforehand (good friend, partner, someone who understands basically) and let them know I might call them if I get worked up - so I do, maybe gossip a bit about the party and then go back to the party. Anything to break up the time and keep your distracted. Equally if you know someone at the party or attending with you and you feel comfortable, let them know and it will give a bit of breathing room and take the edge off. i was at an event (not party) and as I didn’t know anyone I realised I soent the entire tike telling people about my austism and how awkward I find events and it was actually a great icebreaker.

I use moments when food is getting served or other ‘landmarks’ in the event as a means to know how long is left or something to look-forward to. It also tells me how long I need to be in this situation before its over.

I don’t drink or take drugs so being sober throughout definitely ensures I remember everything for better or worse. But staying hydrated is important. Keeps your mind & body functioning. i have tried valerian root and st johns wort to try and be calmer but I found they made me drowsy not calmer so didn’t work for me.

But overall, as I’m sure you’ve experienced before, once its ended you realise it went way better than you thought. Its the aniticpation and lead and over-thinking (which is natural) that is the worst part. Although I do have to tell myself that I’m at place where you’re supposed to be chill and happy when at a part, I know I’ll never be comfortable in that situation. And that acceptance of knowing that I’m uncomfortable and in edge in environments that are supposed to the opposite as been the best distraction of all, as I spend the evening being fixated on ‘why did I find that awkward’, ‘why was that cringe?’ And that in itself distracts enough whilst also giving you some self therapy.

Then again if there’s is any opportunity to have a good time, go for it hope you have a stress free time and I’m sure you will have a great time and give yourself a break whenever you need it.

Have fun

[Rugby3 in reply to Tronsformer]

That is so helpful thank you so much I will definitely take some tips from that into the weekend so thank you

[Mybestfriends]

Agree with Tronsformer & also MY adult Son just found for ASD online things for Stimming, Fiddle with like a Rubber Band but not. Hope you get to have a Less stressful evening, Party On!

[Genieus]

My advice.....don't go. Also, don't take my advice.Otherwise, can you juggle, carve wood? Do they need fire wood collecting? Can you occupy yourself in a way that contributes to the party? Without getting into a conversation with more than 2 people at a time? Cook. Fetch beers.

First, find a place you can disappear to. Make it comfortable. Find an escape route. Don't drink too much. Take a book, sketch pad, chocolate. Say you have to go walking/ lie down/ headache/ migraine etc. We disappear. I do. Find a good excuse for disappearing.