4 years recovered

[becm]

Hello, It's been a few years since I last posted on here. I had post natal psychosis in 2017 after the birth of my now 6 year old son. I then had repeat episodes until mid 2019 so a long recovery. I was told I needed to be on the meds at least 2 years but now here I am, still on meds in 2023. I've recovered enough to manage a part time job mon-fri in a school. It's gone well last 6 months. Just wanted to see if there was anyone else in this situation at all? I have been advised I now have depression with psychosis so giving up the meds is a very difficult choice to make. On the one hand I feel well but on the other I'm scared I will relapse again. The meds give me brain fog and make me more tired, my short term memory has suffered but I'm just unsure which way to go. Stay on or come off with gp support? Has anyone else gone on to have long term psychosis as I am ? Any replies greatly appreciated and to everyone going through this right now I just want to say that I thought I'd never recover but I did, it took longer than I thought but gradually the tide changed as my little one grew and there is light at the end of the tunnel x

[Cheryl-2021 Volunteer]

Hello becm

Just wanted to pop on a few words of support. I was on medication for a year and I understand how it can be a focus to get off them, but I do recommend if your psychiatrist says you need them, then stick with them. Maybe you can discuss how you are feeling and see if there is alternative options for you with medication.

You could also try simple things to help with your cognitive memory like playing Articulate, Scrabble, Snap or even a game of "I went to the shop" I find things like this sound simple, but are actually quite challenging when you feel like this with your short term memory.

Take care

Koala x

[Bulb]

Hi becm

My daughter is in a similar position to you. She has depression with psychosis. After six years she is due to reduce her meds and is very nervous. She will never be completely without medication. When she has tried to reduce previously the depression did return briefly but her difficult life circumstances have changed so I am more hopeful now.

You could consider a very small reduction of medication with time in between to re adjust. Its also good to let friends and family know so they can spot any changes in mood and help if needed. I hope this helps.

[Ellie_at_APP Partner]

Hi Becm

I'm so glad you have reached out again on the forum. It's good to hear that you have recovered well after what sounds like a really hard time, and are now wondering about coming of your meds.

I am currently on an anti psychotic and depressant too, and I know what you mean about brain fog and memory sometimes.

I wonder if really slowly reducing the medication, with a psychatrist's advice, will reassure you, so if you have any unsuaul thoughts etc, you can just increase the medication again? This is what I did the first time I came off them, and it really reassured me, and helped with anxiety about getting unwell again.

It's something you could ask your GP, whether they could refer you to a psychiatrist to support you with it?

Take care,

Ellie

[Pikorua Volunteer]

Hello becm, not sure whether we corresponded before?! Pleased that you took the courage to write again and expressed your feelings.

I will not read through the other post, but respond straight away to your thoughts as I feel so passionate about developing inner strengths through self-help management.

I am pleased that you are positive and reflective about the past few years.

I feel quite strongly about your case and would ask for a second opinion. I am not sure about the combination of depression and psychosis, - as a diagnosis in my opinion it is either the one or the other or depression followed by psychosis. I am not an expert and just reflect on the accounts from our forum over the years.

I know so many women who are worried to wean off or just not being sure about the meds they take. It is realy important to be able to trust a proper Psychiatrist and subsequently be able to feel confident about given guidance and suggested meds and/or weaning off process. Yet, all depends on diagnosis.

In my case I have a chronical condition, which is Bipolar 1 diagnosed 8 yrs after PPP. My suffering has been immense, not only because of ill treatment at a Psychiatric hospital in 2010, but not being able to rest nor sleep much for many years, which of course affected my routine, especially concentration level.

The partnership tried hard with the after care, however, they did not identify BP and I lost confidence with my care coordinator and managed to let go of her after 8 long years. Support Network has to be beneficial for the person, who wants to get better!

It is important that recovery has to have progression with the aim of living a fulfilled and happy life again. That was possible with the support of APP since 2016 and receiving consultation from Professor Ian Jones at Cardiff University.

Choices (personal preferences according to life style and circumstances) have to be made once you are happy with your diagnosis and given advice and support by appropriate health professionals.

I believe I never followed main stream advice, but listen to my own body and worked together with my partner. I rejected Lithium and Mood Stabiliser suggested by Professor Ian Jones. My partner and I have chosen to live with CBD. Yet, we are all so different and we have to walk our own path, the one which is suitable for us.

My concentration level is a pendulum, but with the help of my modalities I am managing the ups and downs quite well. However, you have to be disciplined with life style. Mine consists of a healthy diet, daily yoga and reiki, lots of out door activities, beside running a household and being responsible for the welfare of my family, which always takes priority, beside projects such as art and volunteering. All these aspects do help me to keep my MH balanced.

How about some brain storming and journalising and finding options in how you want to continue with your path of recovery. Who could help you with your choices? I studied modalities of therapeutic alternatives. I now can help others, but always focus on my well being first.

Wishing you well.

[Maria_at_APP Moderator]

Hi becm,

I am glad you have reached out here as well and how your post is very positive although you highlight struggles with relapse and side effects of medication, which many of us can relate to. It is so positive that you are working part time in a school and have recovered.

I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder about a year ago and since then have tried to manage my condition with and without medication. My children are young still, 4 and less than 2 years old, and life stressors made it difficult for me to keep my mood stable without the help of medication. That's not to say that if in the future my circumstances allow for it I would very much prefer to be on less drugs or at least less strong. As Pikoura says, we are all quite unique, so what matters at the end is to come up with a plan that best suits you and your family. Your concerns of both relapse and side effects are valid to bring up with your gp, and together you can decide what is the optimum for you.

I just wanted to say do not feel like you are alone in this, medication is always a trial and error process, but you show great self awareness and that is always a really good asset that will help you on your journey.

[Kat_at_APP Volunteer]

hi Becm thanks so much for sharing some of your experiences here. It will really help others feel less alone in their recoveries, and I hope it helps you too.

I still take a low dose antipsychotic, almost 11 years later. I’m fairly blasé about it all now, and having experienced occasional relapses over the years I would rather deal with the medication than with further psychosis.

It’s fantastic that you are managing a busy job, alongside looking after your family. Sounds like you are doing amazingly well, all things considered!

I work part time at a mental health Recovery College, and we often run courses designed to help people understand their medication, and their medication choices. Just something that I thought you might be interested in. Our webinars are free and available to everyone, no matter where you live. Let me know if you’d like more info.

All the best,

Kat x

[Mon2017]

I also had a post partum psychosis in 2017! I was on meds for 3 years and gradually weaned off. Currently have had a lot of stress and am considering going on meds again. I think it is a life long predisposition we face so be kind to yourself! Go slow and if you feel you function better with meds then listen to your body! I struggle a lot with the stigma of medication and the side effects so it’s always a tough decision! Lots of love and strength to you!