Not feeling your self

[Astarlove]

Good people do you at times feel like you are not yrself. Like the mind is still healing. Like some one is holding your brain. Do you feel like your mind is thinking on its own nd its separate from the body. How do you feel during the healing process and how do you handle it,,,?

[Maria_at_APP Moderator]

Hi Astarlove,Welcome to the forum. I am sorry that you have experienced this illness it is so devastating.

I had pp in 2018 after my daughter was born. In your post you describe so vividly what recovery very often feels like. Pp is a huge trauma so you are absolutely right your mind is healing. It took a while for me to feel back to myself and during that time it was difficult to do the activities I used to. I felt like going through the motions like a robot that had programmed itself. It did not last forever, though, slowly my personality started to come back and I found my emotions, my likes and dislikes again.

Time, the support from my family and looking at myself with compassion helped me on the journey. It was useful at the beginning to think of my pp as if I had survived a bad car accident. That gave me some perspective as to being patient and not expect to come bouncing back.

By far one of the things that helped me lots was to get in touch with other mums who have had similar experiences. This forum was a lifeline for me, to be able to share experiences with others who get it.

Take really good care

[Astarlove in reply to Maria_at_APP]

Thank you dear. So do the meds also help in coming back of normalcy and know you are yourself again?

[Maria_at_APP Moderator in reply to Astarlove]

Hi Astarlove,Medication was life saving for me when I was very unwell. I took it for a bit more than a year and it was very helpful, there were side effects to it as it is always with this sort of pills, in my case the benefits outweighted the setbacks.

But medication was not the only thing that helped in my recovery, I had a lot of counselling sessions and they were very beneficial. Maybe that is something that the team following you can offer?

I also did journalling for a while and that helped to see how the good days started to be more frequent as time passed, it felt very encouraging.

Take good care

[Ramlah_at_APP Volunteer]

Good morning Astarlove,

It's okay to feel how you're feeling. The first positive thing you've done is identifying the separation of consciousness, that's normal. It's a sign of healing, so you want to find something to bring back the consciousness to the physical and have the reality of the present and now.

Welcome to the forum, sorry to hear you are not feeling like yourself. Healing takes a while especially when it comes to your mind; With post natal psychosis recovery I found practising mindfulness and CBT helpful. Perhaps even keeping hold of a journal, writing down how you feel on a day to day basis, or even every other day. These are some of the things that helped me to begin to feel like myself again and come into contact with my thoughts.

Take care xx

[Astarlove in reply to Ramlah_at_APP]

How do i get back? This formus is a life saver

[Ramlah_at_APP Volunteer in reply to Astarlove]

Good morning Astarlove,

It's start by believing in yourself and setting yourself small daily tasks or goals to complete. The more you do this, it will impact your brain in a positive manner; Allowing you to begin to feel like yourself once again.

Yes the forum is great and we are here for you all the time.

Take care

[Bumblebeeee]

I think your brain goes into survival mode and it takes a long time to heal. Don’t put any pressure on yourself and just try and accept you have been very I’ll and your brain is still trying to recover. Take time to look after yourself x

[The_Wes_Anderson_Fan Volunteer]

Hi Astarlove, it took quite a while for me to feel like myself again after PP.I felt like the anti psychotic medication helped my brain heal.

I took the healing process step by step, day by day and I slowly felt a bit better every day after I was fully discharged from the MBU. I just took things gently. I tried not to take on more than I could handle.

I didn't feel my mind was separate from my body but I can detach myself from things, if that's what you mean.

Lots of Love, I hope you are making some progress. X