Post natal psychosis 3 months in

[Rob1985]

I just wanted to share my storey to help others out in a similar situation

[Rob1985]

My baby girl was born on the 25 th may 2013 with a traumatic birth, my wife's water broke in the car and made it to the hospital just in time, our baby was born within 6 minutes of being in the hospital, and there was no time for pain relief.

Initially I thought we were doing really well, but after a couple of days our baby girl was bing very irritable, I have since found out that this was because my wife was not making enough milk, I think this upset my wife as she felt inadequate and was not sleeping, after a few days I noticed she was being very lethargic and like she was on drugs, but she was not on any! She also became more demanding, I did not think much of it at first as it is expected for women to be tired.

I wanted to support my wife as much as I could and she made a snap decision to stop breast feeding without even consulting me. This was the first time I thought something was really up.

A couple of days later she really freaked out and was convicted that she has blood clots and demanded to be taken to accident and emergency, she started running around the hospital shouting, and was telling all the doctors that she was going to save the nhs. ( upto this point we have had a very poor service) the mental health team came to vist to asses her and she though they were a news crew waiting to break her story, she had thoughts because our baby was not with us that she was dead. She would not believe us when we told her that this was not true.

We ended up returning home later on when she calmed down and had daily visits from the local perinatal team, after a couple of visits the behaviour did not improve and she was sectioned and taken to a mental Heath hospital.

This was a pretty upsetting time as I was her husband and I had to sign the paperwork to section her, as if this was not enough, I had my 1 week old baby to look after with 1 weeks experience on my own.

I am in the Royal Navy and had to let them know that, I would not be able to return to work when my baby leave ran out the next week, and they were of course very understanding, and offered me 4 weeks compationate leave( this is the most that they can grant)

The first couple of days my wife seemed to get worse and I was not allowed to visit her. It took about a week to find the right medication for her, ollazapine and clanzipan. Once the medication had been sorted I could visit her everyday with our daughter. This was a tough week as a really missed my wife and felt pretty helpless. I looked through the Internet researching PPP and found very little.

She was at the mental Heath hospital for 4 weeks in total waiting to be well enough to be admitted to the mother and baby unit. This was a good time as the severe effects had gone and it felt like we were definitely on the road to recovery.

She settled in well, I took our daughter there to meet her and then our baby strayed there with her. The nurses there helped my wife get the bond back with the baby.

And my wife was learning how to look after her, I was in a strange position , teaching my wife all the little techniques I had learned in the previous 4 weeks, which works for our baby.

This made my wife a little jealous I feel, as its a mother that should know all the baby's quirks. After a week at the mother baby unit she came home for the first time.

What a relief, but I was still on edge not wanting to leave mum and baby together alone just encase she freaked out again.

I should have just trusted her she was doing fine and gradually I would leave them to walk the dog, or pop to the shop.

I returned to work and when I got back home of an evening, I would take on most of the looking after baby as she was really tired, especially being on the drugs.

Our baby is now 3 months old and doing well, Jenny is still recovering and has not made much more of an improvement since coming home, she can't really enjoy days out and can become very anxious. She also sleeps a lot ( at least 12 hrs a day) and I have got the MABU to perscibe her medication for depression, that say it will take a couple of weeks to lift her mood, I will let you know how it goes. Bt there is still a long road to go.

I think she was also really anxious about me potentially having to go the Syria. Thank god our MP's saw sense not to get involved.

[Lilybeth Volunteer in reply to Rob1985]

Hello Rob,

Thanks for sharing your story. You have done so well to support your wife and look after your daughter. I hope you have found support for yourself at this difficult stage in the journey.

I'm glad your wife is at home, although as you say not improved much. I am not sure about medical treatment in the Forces but hope there is a care plan in place for your wife. I have no experience of Mother and Baby Units as I was sectioned to a general psychiatric hospital almost thirty-eight years ago. I'm sure you will receive very helpful advice from others here so please keep in touch.

Rest assured that with professional care and your support your wife will slowly but surely make a full recovery.

[Tania1 in reply to Rob1985]

Rob well done for coping during this very difficult time. My husband was with me through my illness never giving up on me and having faith I'd recover. I developed PP 5 days after birth of our Son & luckily was transferred to a MBU nearby. I was there 2 months & came home & thought I was getting better but then gradually got worse & went into deep depression. I decided to got back into the MBU where i remained for a further 5 months. I developed Bipolar disorder solely due to childbirth. With drugs & ECT & support I made a full recovery. It was so tough & very bad for my husband but we got there. Never be afraid to talk & get support yourself. Often Dads get forgotten about. We got through it & living a normal life now. Never give up!

[JoannaBrooks]

Thanks for sharing your story. Sorry to hear about your wife's and your suffering. But sounds like she is on the right track. It takes time but in the grand scheme of things she has recovered fairly quickly, I know for me getting the antidepressant into my system made a massive difference with the anxiety I had once the psychosis was gone. I hope she has a similar experience. Also pleased for you about Syria- that must have been a big concern for your wife, and I'm glad she or you no longer has that also to contend me.

Believe it or not this whole episode will seem like a distant memory one day and things will go back to how they were.

[sarah_at_app Volunteer]

Hi Rob,

Thanks for getting in touch and sorry to hear about the difficult time you are all having.

It sounds like your wife has come a long way in a short space of time. Recovery is so gradual and its good that your wife and daughter are now at home. Well done for the way you have kept things going and been so supportive.

When I came out of hospital after having PP a long time ago, I think I went home too soon although I wanted to be at home and pleaded with the hospital staff to let me go home. I felt I didn`t make much improvement but when I looked back I realised how much I had progressed. I didn`t notice this because it was so gradual.

PP comes as such a shock and a huge blow, the good thing is with the right help and support recovery is good.

Good luck and feel free to keep in touch on here, I`d like to help if I can answer any questions,

Take care,

Sarah

[andrea_at_app Volunteer]

Hi Rob,

Yes it's such a shock when PP comes completely out of the blue, certainly not the start you expect it to be! It sounds like you're doing a great job caring for your wife & daughter, even if at times you might not feel like you are. Well done for getting her antidepressants, I delayed getting mine which really wasn't helpful at all. I understand your wife feeling jealousy when you were teaching her how to look after your baby, I think the guilt a mum can feel about the missing early days/weeks can be really hard to deal with - I think it eases with time though.

Are you able to care for your wife daily or do you work away a lot? I imagine this would add pressure so it must be a huge relief that you're not going to Syria. Does she have a care team, Psychiatrist, Community Psychiatric nurse (CPN) looking after her now? Having family &/or close friends nearby can really help. My mum used to phone me every morning to make sure I'd got out of bed which really helped (a huge challenge at the time as I had the lethargy & slept all the time too).

This Recovery Guide might be worth reading to give you an idea & tips on issues your wife may be dealing with, particularly section 2: 6 months to a year (pg 9) & section 3: Moving On. It might be a good idea to direct your wife to it when she's ready. app-network.org/wp-content/...

Also there's this Carer's Survival Guide if you haven't seen it: app-network.org/what-is-pp/...

Remember that having time to yourself to relax & de-stress is really important too. It's such a difficult time but as the others have said, recovery is a gradual process but she really will get there & be the person she used to be again.

Look after yourself & let us know how you're doing.

[Hannah_at_APP Administrator]

Hi Rob,

Not sure what I can add to the replies already on here but just to say that it sounds as though things are moving forward, slowly but surely...

I'd echo what others are saying: the huge shock of PP, particularly out of the blue like this, and that recovery is a slow and frustrating process at times. But it's great that you are home together and are on the next stage of the road to recovery together. It might not feel like it yet but just being out of hospital is a big achievement, even if it doesn't feel that things are much improved yet. I also had olanzapine and can say that for me personally it was a good medication in hindsight, although at the time it did really "zonk" me and I slept lots and was very lethargic and pretty numb really all in all. The feeling of anxiety is also something I can relate to - I don't think I changed much in the early days and weeks at home from how I was once stabilised in the MBU. I know this also frustrated my husband and made everything very hard work for him - as if it's not hard work enough with a baby, and with all that he went through in the early days of my psychosis.

Anxiety at whatever level (from the extremes whilst in hospital, to the day-to-day stuff now home) can take a good while to overcome. It will be all about learning techniques and little things that you can all enjoy as a family. I know for example that I was really proud of myself for leaving our then 5/6 month old and going to a friend's surprise 30th party, and actually making it through the night socialising with a lot of people, some I didn't know that well, a lot of them had no idea of how ill I'd been and was still struggling. But it's the "normal" things that after a while will start to feel more so, and less of a mountain to climb. I loved having days out at the seaside or whatever but only when my son was approaching a year old - it just felt too much for a long time. Seeing families with small babies out and about even now, it makes me think "how did they do that", but I know ours was a different and difficult situation, but not something I can change. It does take a while to work up to these things. And in the meantime, I was just grateful we were all at home and together. I'm sure you just being around is helping your wife more than you know.

I hope things continue to improve now the hospital have prescribed her some more meds. I know for me it took a few goes and combinations to get it "right" - and this delayed my discharge, so it's great that you have the relationship there with the MBU. Have you also managed to get some input for a Community MH Team or good GP? If you feel like letting us know how you get on, please pop back with an update when you get chance. Take care and keep enjoying your family together.

[hackneygirl]

Hi Rob, So sorry your family are going through this tough time. I know how hard it was on my husband when I was so ill. I also slept a lot on the drugs. It was so hard to drag myself out of bed in the mornings, but this eased up as soon as they scaled back the drugs. Hang in there - to both of you. She will get better! Jen