It sucks to be in a relationship and still feel alone. Wanting more time with the person you are with seems like a good thing but I guess I’m wrong. Two days a week does not seem enough when you are engaged to someone. I shouldn’t have to beg for attention. I’m not a perfect size and I’m not beautiful and I might not ever find someone else who loves me but I shouldn’t be alone so much in a relationship. I shouldn’t spend holidays and my birthday alone. It’s embarrassing always making excuses why he’s not there during times that you are suppose to be with the ones you love. Tomorrow is my birthday and nothing is planned not a gift not even a simple dinner cooked for me or flowers. His time would just be enough but again I will spend it by myself. It’s hard to think about breaking things off I can’t find away to make that choice. I’m so lost and lonely.