Time to return to work

[djonmars1973]

After 2 weeks off work with depression and Anxiety I am returning to work on Sunday . If I don't return then I will never go.

After 2 weeks I feel just as bad, sad, tired, anxious, all the symptoms. I see no hope. I,m convinced I,m gonna lose my job coz feel not strong enough to carry on and that means they'll take my home away (the main thing that keeps Mr going) .

As I write this I feel quite desperate and frightened, surely life is meant to be more than this hell.

I,m not in serious debt or anything and wonder about those who are, now how do they cope I ask?

[Kirsty456]

Hi I'm in exact same position well very similar I've been off now 9 weeks in my 10th week n my symptoms seem to be worsening rather than better I need a visit to the gp I av suffered a huge drop in income as I don't get sick pay and as a family we are struggling n I av no help phoned welfare today but they didn't help in fact they were extremely rude I thought

So in a way in been pushed back to my job but I'm nowhere near ready for back I'm still not myself and mines a physical job I walk all of my shift m with the jelly legs headaches n dizziness my job won't help me at this present time

[djonmars1973 in reply to Kirsty456]

Thank you for replying. I,m so sorry you're struggling too. It's really horrible.

I live on my own which sometimes doesn't help as it feels like I am the only one in the world, which of course isn't true as you have a similar problem. I try to keep occupied but my mind just keeps focusing on the worse thing that could happen. Just feel exhausted all the time so I know exactly how you feel, could go back for a Doctors note but it would just go on forever.

Mental illness is still not understood, no more now that it was 50 years ago and some people can be really cruel.

[Kirsty456 in reply to djonmars1973]

I know it's always catch 22 does my box in i am strong n I will get through this but everyone has a breaking point n I believe this is mine so tine to think about me for a change

N yes I feel exactly the same that the worst is going to happen especially at work omg it's so hard n it's an awful illness to av

I keep getting told to get on with it or pick ur self up its nor Easier said then done as you all know it's a difficult one n time is a great healer

[Hidden]

Sorry that your life feels so uncomfortable, I gather you are still young and are finding life a bit of a chore. You should be discussing all with your GP and then ask yourself what you would prefer to do with your life. If you are still young and have just entered the world of work all could be making you feel unsettled. If that is the case you need to consider going back to the grind and perform your duties. During that period of time consider other jobs and arrange interviews for new positions that may be more interesting and beneficial.

Remember you need to work so you can live and feed, all people who work need to consider this and sad to say you are no different. If you do not go back to work now things could become worse in getting back to work, you may be putting off returning because of your feeling of depression and anxiety.

I do not know what you do or what tickets you have and if you could get another position easily. The world is now so uncertain, that is why I say look for another position in strength, you have at least a job. Employers always seem to employ someone who will come from another position. Remember they will always ask why you want to leave your earlier position.

At least you are in a position where you are earning money to keep yourself a float

BOB

[djonmars1973 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for replying to me. You are so right, I suppose I knew that anyway really. I am not young at all perhaps another ten years before I retire (come across as young because of my insecurities). This is my problem because of my age I find it hard to find an alternative position. The job I do is poorly paid, stressful and just adds to the stress I already feel. I refuse medication because I worry what it's doing to me, I don,t relax on it.

I just have to find a way of coping but realising as you quite rightly say we all need to work to feed and for me to pay the mortgage.

The only thing that worries me is that if I lose this job because it all gets too much I may lose my lovely home and that is the only thing that keeps me going at the present.

[Hidden]

With my condition I suffer chronic pain and a reactive depression caused by my disability, I was retired on health grounds a long time ago and I have had to manage my life on Opiates and Anti depressants, all I really can suggest is after talking to your GP If he advises medications and talking therapy. take it all, it should help you get your life back. I am sixty five in about a month and I need to take medications for the rest of my life, if you get relief, go for it

Good Luck

BOB

[lin62-65ze]

I hope that you are on some form of medication, some take at least a month to kick in. Sadly unless you are in a government job it's true many companies are unsympathetic, however you sound very sensible, you have your own home, are not in debt. This denotes that you have depression because something has triggered this, can you remember what? Do you have family support? I think you need to concentrate on everything which makes you happy, try to get relaxation tapes they teach you breathing methods. You sound still young, if you are still not well after a few days back at work, would it be possible for you to try for a different job? Now is the time for all sorts of things, people with money will always want, gardeners, decorators, etc. Firstly you need to get strong, depression depletes your energy levels. Please look on the bright side, this will soon be gone, let me know how you get on 😊😊

[djonmars1973 in reply to lin62-65ze]

Depression is in the family I,m afraid, my father suffered. I don't take any kind of medication apart from herbal that's all. I saw what pills has done to my brother he's on loads and still no better, just slower. I am quite energetic and enjoy racing around and don't want that to change,so I suppose I must find other ways to cure this anxiety. A change if job would help. Thank you for replying it is really positive and has made me feel a little better.

[lin62-65ze in reply to djonmars1973]

Remember that you are not alone. You are stronger than the rest of your family and will conquer this. I have every faith in you, I know you can do this, will be right behind you, always here if you need me☺️☺️👍👍

[djonmars1973 in reply to lin62-65ze]

Thank you I appreciate your support. I made it to work today and the staff were nice to me. Must admit I feel rather drained tonight but it's probably taken it out of me as I had a rather unsettled sleep last night. So I do realise I am always going to have to live with anxiety but must try and manage differently, you're never too old to learn as they say. Thanks again

[lin62-65ze in reply to djonmars1973]

Good for you, keep it up and if possible seek less tiring work. I shall be thinking about you 😉😉😊😊

[tech]

Hello, I can sympathise as I'm in a similar position. I have been off work with a broken hip. I was depressed before I left and returning has been hell. I feel sick (even when I'm off), tired depressed and last week when my boss sent me a stroppy email I had a crying fit in front of everybody and got sent home. Even simple tasks send me into a panic. You are quite right - life is supposed to be better than this and I've given in: I've gone on the Redeployment register at work and in 4 weeks time will hand in my notice. I can't cope anymore and my poor husband iis having to put up with it. We will have to give up holidays and cut back on the groceries but it's that or go mad. I feel really guilty at throwing it all in after 37 years and leaving with nothing but we'll cope. The thing is to talk it over with someone - your partner perhaps or youyr doctor might be able to help or the CAB with your house. Best luck x

[djonmars1973 in reply to tech]

I really admire what you've done and being in your position would have done the same. I hope you feel better soon and hopefully find another job with less hours, your health comes first. Unfortunately I split with my partner so have to carry on working to pay the mortgage and survive,

It's a retail job and I go back tomorrow after 3 weeks, at the moment I feel so tired and gonna have to sleep for an hour now. I can't seem to think straight and this afternoon I have been losing stuff , making mistakes. I should be visiting my brother now but feel too ill. Thanks for replying it makes me feel so much better to share this.

[tech]

You're welcome. I workers for 20 years in public service job and although iI liked it customers really got on my nerves sometimes and being nice to some rude old bag was very difficult. If it is a large company you work for, would it be worth talking to HR? My direct boss is a nasty piece of work but I went over his head (he doesn't like me anyway) to his boss who obviously thought i was a wimp but was very helpful. As I found out, if you resign you can't get any state benefit immediately. I think the CAB are the people to talk to about what you can and can't do. They're free and confidential. If you Google " mental health uk" you can find organisations like Mind who will also give you practical advice and who are experienced iin our kind of problems.

[djonmars1973 in reply to tech]

Thank you that's a great help and will try to get some advice. I made it to work today which is something, feeling rather drained but better in myself. My company has a helpline I can phone for support and advice, worth a try.

[Hidden]

i can relate to what you are saying. I worry myself sick about not being strong enough with my Anxiety to continue working .. i’m scared about loosing all the hard work iv done over the years and letting everyone down !

[djonmars1973 in reply to Hidden]

You would never let anyone down you have been strong but sometimes it all gets too much. I feel I have let loads of people down in my life that doesn’t help way I feel. I am back to work tomorrow and have this sick feeling inside and it’s always ok when I actually get to work and it will be the same with you you will get through sounds like you always have done so there you go I’m off to sleep now but always here to help