Angry :\

Feeling really angry today... lots of things that have been building up recently. I've been really stressed out due to my grandmother being in hospital (though she has now been moved into care so things are a little better there), work stress and general self-esteem issues. Just getting seriously p*ssed off with it all now!!! I can't seem to carry out the simplest tasks because I get nervous and anxious. It's affecting my sleep again and my mood in general. Why is it as soon as I'm feeling good it knocks me back again???!! Have been rowing with my other half as well, he's normally so supportive but I think me and all my issues have gotten too much for him lately as well, he seems to be armed and ready with criticism rather than support at the moment which just makes me feel useless. Anyway just needed a rant.... thanks for reading..... x

[seyi]

Hi KMLF

Don't be so hard on yourself feeling angry is understandable and your right when you say it a build up. It is natural to feel stressed when someone has been in hospital as this sets off anxiety to a high level. I hope now your grandmother is feeling a little better this will bring your anxiety down a little knwoing she is being cared for.

Hey your not alone regarding carrying out simple tasks i had to make a journey into work today about being phased back in and i was nervous and felt i would never make it. Something so simple like getting a bus is laughable to people who can achieve this but i struggle big time. As for sleep of course it will affect your mood because you have not the energy to cope so therefore you get snappy wish i had a pound everytime i was told this When you have a good nights rest you seem to be able to cope much better as you are well rested its like a vicious circle.

We all have good days but we seem to focus on the bad day's and like your saying as soon as you feel your making progress your knocked back down again. But you need to think i will not allow this to beat me, take over my life. I was told by my therapist its a circle that we need to break sounds easy i know but keep reminding yourself of this. I sometimes feel like throwing in the towel but then i get angry and think no...............

I have a good husband who is so supportive but i am sure at times the way i am he struggles and gets frustrated but i am sure he does not mean to criticize you.

We forget that they are trying to come to terms on what is happening and how to deal with it which i suppose it difficult.

Please don't think your useless everyone has a purpose and i am sure with positive thoughts and attitude you will start to feel better.

I hope you have better days ahead.

Take care Hugs

Love Seyi xxx

[Hidden in reply to seyi]

Hello Seyi

Thanks so much for your reply

I feel like a different person today, I guess yesterday was just one of those days!! Although I did go training last night (Thai boxing) so punching and kicking the crap out of some punch bags probably helped a lot lol

So true about the sleep thing - I've had so much on my mind that I can't switch off. Common among anxiety sufferers I know! Or I'm falling asleep really easily but then waking up at 2/3/4 in the morning feeling panicky! Which as you rightly said then makes the days seem more difficult because I'm exhausted. Argh!

Anyway feeling a lot more positive now - I'm normally quite determined to keep plodding along and not let this beat me - but sometimes so many things happen at once that its difficult not to fall down and feel like quitting.

Thanks for your kind words, I hope you are doing well

KMLF x

[seyi]

Hi KMLFG

I am so happy that you have a positive out look today and feeling a different from the way you felt yesterday its great to hear. Wow the Thai boxing is something that you can take your frustration out on and anger smiling most likely was a relief.

I hope you get some better nights sleep i was told by the therapist to take really deep breaths let out slow and then the last push out this can really help.

So glad you are determined to keep plodding along and do not allow it to beat you. Its a vicious circle that we need to break free from then we can get on with our lives what a wonderful thought :).

Sometimes it feels like so many things are attacking us and we panic but take one step at a time and deal with the priority issues first.

Please stay strong and may you find peace.

Never Quit. Have a great day

Best wishes

Love Seyi xxx