Depression, lonliness, or both?

[Lonely_girl]

I have been dealing with this constant feeling of emptiness and that nothing matters for more than a month now. Not the first time I feel this way, to be honest I feel like that since I have memory. I know it goes in cycles. I know this will probably past too, but it gets harder and harder to leave these cycles once I´ve fall in one of them.

I´ve recently broken up with my partner and as I knew would happen, this turned my life down in ways that are not logical or reasonable. Since I have a childhood trauma that is related to the dysfuntional and unestable relationship of my parents, I have a unmesured desaire (and obligation) to make every relationship works, to prove myself that I can create something different from what I have when I was a child, however, I end up replicating almost in the exact way the situations I lived with my parents relationship. So when, once again, one of these relationships fail, I feel like a failure myself and nothing that I do, am, have, matters anymore.

I´m an overthinker, as all people with anxiety disorder. So to go over and over every detail of a failed relationship feels like a perpetous torture. As my anxiety picks I prefer to be alone, since I feel people may find my troubles boring and idiotics. However, it hurts to be alone in these times, I´m a very affectionate person and when I feel low all I want is the company of friends and love ones, but I realized, thanks to this last break up. that currently I have no one to turn to in these situations, so I spend my days with the computer and the tv as my only companies.

So I´ve been falling from heartbreak, to anxiety, to depression, deeper and deeper. I do therapy, take medications, journaling, read a lot, but nothing seems to replace the healing effect of a good friend by your side or just knowing that someone cares.

Maybe I´m over dramatic, maybe it is just the unbalance chemical in my brains, maybe it is just life, but I feel so overwhelm whit sadness and emptiness at the moment, that I needed it to share it in here.

[ongaku666]

Sending love 💜 , I know it's tough when you feel like that, I'm also going through this.

I don't know exactly why your relationship ended but one thing about patterns like that is to break them, to go out of your way to not "go there" the same way as before.

And one thing I have practiced that worked for me was to "witness myself", meaning to watch your behaviours and your thoughts when you notice you're spiralling down again. If you can catch yourself projecting and can be compassionate with yourself, you might over time learn to deviate from those patterns and learn that you don't need to live the way you were brought up. That you choose what's healthy in your life! 💪

If you feel like talking send me a message 🙂

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Stay strong

[god_bless_everyone]

Stay strong and try to engage yourself in some activities. I know it could be little hard but you can do it. I'm also going through the hard time and have started taking prozac for last couple of weeks.

[Moonira in reply to god_bless_everyone]

Hi. Curious abput Prozac. My mother loved it and it worked magic for her. How are you finding it? Side effects? Thinking of asking to switch as I am verrry much like Mom was. Thanks and have a good day🌸🦋🌈🌻

[god_bless_everyone in reply to Moonira]

Hi, thanks for your message. Well, I have tried Prozac earlier as well like 3 years ago (just for one month). So, I was comfortable with it this time as well. For me, it takes couple of weeks to start showing any positive results. After couple of weeks, I feel more stable and confident. And I do not feel any major side effects. But apart from medication, I also make sure I stick to my routines like exercise and meditation. Feel better. Have a wonderful day 😊

[QCuriosa]

We are here and understand. Do you work? Or volunteer? Maybe that would help. Having something to do and to helpOthers may help you

[Daveacr1959]

All we can do is tell you what helps us. And we can relate to you, and tell you life has ups and downs. Guided deep breathing exercises free on you tube help me each day. Something about the huffing and puffing helps. I rarely take hot showers anymore. And I take barely warm. And then rinse 10 minutes in cold . You can work up to it a bit colder each week. 30-40 minutes of daily cardio exercise is awesome too. And spend time with loved ones each week. Even if it’s family. The deep breathing with breath holds. The cold water and excercise. Gets me out of my own head. I even work part time when I don’t have to. My life got to be too much 2 years ago when I had to battle a rough illness. I seem to have p t s d from it. And this stuff helps me.

[Moonira in reply to Daveacr1959]

So glad you pulled through your illness. May you continue to feel well. 🌸🦋🦋🌈

[Moonira]

Hello Lonely Girl. Right place to vent your feelings. I can relate to.many of yours....depression, anxiety, emptiness plus in my case constant battle to motivate myself to do ANYTHING....It will proably be my bsttle for life. I.am medicated etc.. who knows maybe the meds decrease my motivation! I push myself to go fot walks,.swim and do stationary buking. My kind psychiatrist told me yesterday it is important to do one thing every day that brings you some meadure of joy. So I will follow that advice and hope you will too. You are NOT alone...please take care of yourself. God bless.💫👏💫🌸🦋🌈🌻

[JkBauer]

Good afternoon Sending you hugs! Loneliness is tough to get through.

One of the best ways that I have found to get through loneliness is to make a conscious effort, get up and decide to go volunteer, go do something, get out and get a hobby, take a class... Go out and make a difference! The more you get out and get involved with something else, the less you start to dwell on what you have left behind. By getting up and getting involved helps you by helping others "it's a win-win!"