Losing myself

[Lostsheep73]

Hello, I currently have lots of trauma & stress in my life. My marriage is pretty much over & I feel paralyzed by this anxiety that won’t stop in my head. My blood pressure is high and I need to find the strength to move on from this emotionally abusive marriage, yet I feel so weak emotionally & physically. I used to be able to move on from painful situations but this last year I have not. I worry about everything & everyone. I can’t seem to break the cycle with my mind

[Fearoffear]

I have been where you are Lost. It's very hard to stop worrying about ourselves and loved ones and everything in general. I went through a divorce 16 years ago. This last year has me fighting a bit with my agoraphobia. I'm here to listen if you need it. Gentle hugs 🤗

[lewis1 in reply to Fearoffear]

Firstly, as I am a man you not wish to talk to me, however, I am good, honest, older man who has a lot of life experience and knowledge, especially regarding relationships, and a persons behaviour. I will always listen but never judge.

[Lostsheep73 in reply to lewis1]

Lewis, I tried to copy and paste my reply to you. I’m not tech savvy. Lol! But if you could read my response to fear of fear. It is the same message I was trying to send you! Thank you so much for your response. It means the world to me 💛

[Lostsheep73 in reply to Fearoffear]

Thank you for your response! It means the world to me because I’ve felt all alone fighting my issues. It’s hard when your family just doesn’t understand these awful mental challenges are real and can strike a loved one. I have so many things going on in my life and I can’t seem to get a grip on any of them. I feel I’ve just given up and I know down deep that’s not who I was. I guess I’m trying to love the new me. However I don’t even know the new me, because this new me is not someone I want to be. I’ve been trying to reach out to a counselor but having a hard time finding one who takes my insurance . So I give up again. Rewind: 6 months ago. My husband lost his job which was a good paying job and the bread winner for our family. So we’ve been living on his 401k and that is now depleted. We have a large house payment which we can no longer afford. We live in the country on a beautiful 10acres. Now we are looking at moving into a camper temporarily. But I can’t seem to see the benefits for the future I just get stuck in the gloom. Change is very hard for me, as I’m sure no one else really likes it either. I have several health issues that have gotten worse, which has stolen my energy to get things done to move forward. My two oldest daughters just went through break ups in the same week leaving them single parents to small children. I worry about them & my granddaughters so often. I have a son at home who is adhd and very high maintenance like his momma lol! Another daughter 16 who I feel has been ignored because all the other children stole my attention & energy. I believe in God, but I’m having a hard time focusing on him right now. I’ll end this post as to not drag it on. as I hope you will have some ideas for me. So glad I found this community. May God Bless! 💛