I might just be writing this for myself, but I'll try to keep this in a nutshell. I'm a mom of adult children... I have a daughter who is almost 23 and a son who is 19. I grew up with a lot of trauma and neglect, so I did my best to parent them differently. They always knew that they were loved completely... and maybe I tried to fix things for them... probably a bit too much. My daughter is an extrovert... she is smart and outgoing and always wants to be doing something... and she has NO friends. Every time that she starts building a friendship, something happens and is all blows up.
A year and a half ago she ended things with a boyfriend and called me in the middle of the night telling me that her life wasn't worth living. I drove three hours to where she was and spent the next two days trying to get her support. ... and then I CRASHED... HARD.
It has been a year and a half now and I'm still not the person I was before this all happened. I'm on three different meds and I still have no motivation... no joy. I LOVED my job before this happened... now I'm barely hanging on.
Things were going ok though... not bad, but not good, ... until last weekend when my daughter had her roommates all turn on her. She was distraught which led me right back down the rabbit hole. I'm so afraid for her... will she be ok??? I can't stop worrying about her... which brings me to my knees.
I hope that someday I'll be back to the vibrant person I once was... but it's been so long. My husband told me today, "I remember who you really are", which was so sweet that it hurt.
Sorry for the novel... It was just time that I got this out there.
Written by
TheEmptyNest
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Hi , I can feel your pain.Worrying about your kids is a fact of life no matter their age.I have been in your shoes quite a few times.You have to be kind to yourself, get help if you need it and let your kids make their own way.
You will always worry about them, but you are a strong woman and you will get through!
Don't worry, vent as much. We don't mind. Sometimess it good to write to a diary that responds bck instead of a page staring back at u. I am sorry tho about ur daughter I can see u are hurt by all this. Does ur daughter mind finding friends on line? There are local online sites where u can find friends and later meet up with them and continue with the friendship, hope things work out. We got ur back here.
Thank you Zoom12345! I so appreciate knowing that there are people out there who care!
Hi follow mum,
I too have2 adult children 24 & 18. Both are quite quiet and shy but my daughter suffers from social anxiety disorder.
I use to feel fearful for them but my friend taught me to pray for them and I pray for their friends aswell. So start praying for them and for your healing.
It's just an idea but maybe you two could go into therapy help you develop mental and emotional resilience. So next time something happens she won't have a meltdown and you won't crash.
Thank you so much for your response! I pray constantly... Sometimes I feel like I'm bothering God, but I keep trying anyway! I'll look at your link now... thanks for sending it!
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