Five months ago I got pregnant and I had the happiest two months of my life, followed by a miscarriage. The baby/foetus came out of me intact and I saw it when I was on my own in the hospital toilets.At first I just felt numb, in the hospital I was completely calm and didn’t even say anything to anyone until I was back in my hospital bed when I mentioned it to a nurse.
I’m now three months on from the scan that confirmed my pregnancy had ended and I feel like I’m going insane. Rather than feeling better I feel worse all the time, cannot stop crying (luckily am working from home so there’s no one around to see), I can’t concentrate on anything, I feel like I’ve forgotten how to do my job. I just sit here every day remembering all the blood and tubes that came out of me.
I realise this might not count as a depression post to some but I just felt like I needed to put this somewhere.
I don’t really know who to talk to other than my therapist, I don’t know how to make anyone understand how lost and confused I feel, it’s like I can’t remember how to live anymore.