Deadly anxiety: Hi everyone! I am... - Anxiety and Depre...

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Deadly anxiety

Jenny1234567 profile image
49 Replies

Hi everyone! I am battling serious depression and anxiety I feel anxious all the time and so lonely. Even when I'm in a room full of people I feel so disconnected and in my own head. Has anyone ever experienced such strong anxiety that they cannot function I am missing work and not eating I've lost 20 pounds so far. I feel like everything is falling apart. I want to feel ok again because the anxiety hurts too bad to continue living this way. I cannot remember anything I enjoy doing and I push everyone away from me because I cant stop thinking and laying in bed. Please someone tell me if this will ever end.

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Jenny1234567 profile image
Jenny1234567
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49 Replies
Boomba76 profile image
Boomba76

YES!! I am having one of those days today myself! Such pain and sadness today.

Your post sounds very familiar, I have also lost 20lbs.

Minutes are going by like hours and hours like days!!

Must be something in the air today, hang in there.

We have each other... 😃

Jenny1234567 profile image
Jenny1234567 in reply to Boomba76

Thanks Boomba! I wish this would just end. I am glad I am not alone however I am so sorry to hear that you are experiencing these same symptoms. I don't know how long I can live this way and I feel like I have lost all connection to life I only try to sleep constantly. I am so thankful for your response and I feel less alone which seems to be all I feel anymore.

Newbeginnings20 profile image
Newbeginnings20

Hi Jenny

First of all I am sending you a huge bug hug 🤗

I’m so sorry you are feeling like this - it must be crap! I suffer to very much with anxiety all started when I entered peri-menopause. I am able to work though but struggle at times.

Can I ask are you in the UK?

If so there is so much help out there for you.

Have you discussed how you feel with your GP? Do you know what started it or has it always been there?

There will be support groups too.

I hope you have family around you to support you whilst you feel like this.

The library is a good place to go I found as it is calming and has lots of books on anxiety etc

Walking too helps me and relaxing bubble baths or dancing round the room to my favourite music full blast lol x

Jenny1234567 profile image
Jenny1234567 in reply to Newbeginnings20

Thank you so much for the comment new beginnings I am in the US and I have seen my doctor and am taking medication. I just feel so terrible.

Newbeginnings20 profile image
Newbeginnings20 in reply to Jenny1234567

Hi Jenny

Maybe it isn’t the right medication or has it not been long? Do you know why you are feeling like this?

Jenny1234567 profile image
Jenny1234567 in reply to Newbeginnings20

I'm know what started it my husband left me. My mom had to have major surgery and now cannot walk and I live next door to her. My sister who lives with me and helps with my kids has told me she wont be around much longer and is dying. Our home is falling apart and needs major repairs I just don't know what to do anymore

Marshall64 profile image
Marshall64 in reply to Jenny1234567

You are going through several major life changes so anxiety and isolation is understandable.

I went through a divorce and I couldn't believe how much pain was possible. I didn't think I could get through it but I did.

My house needs major work too. There are a lot of things that need my attention and I get overwhelmed by it all.

Do you have any support groups in your area? They have helped me and it felt good to get out of the house.

Jenny1234567 profile image
Jenny1234567 in reply to Marshall64

Thank you Marshall this is the closest thing I have to a support group. I wish there was support groups but I live in the country in a very isolated area which doesn't help at all.

john6456 profile image
john6456

yes, I totally understand how you feel.It is the worst feeling in the world. I have to go back to work as a teacher in 10 days, and don't know if I can. I take clonopin, which calms me down, but this feeling is unbearable. I just want to stay in bed, and do nothing for the next 10 days. pain and suffering are unbearable. I saw a psychiatrist but he just gave me some new pills, and said stay in the moment. I feel all alone, as no one really cares what happens to me.

Jenny1234567 profile image
Jenny1234567 in reply to john6456

I'm so sorry John I know this is the most horrible pain I've ever had to endure and I don't know how to keep going myself. I care about you and feel your pain.

Jenny I am so sorry for your pain, because I am feeling exactly the same way. It is unbearable!! My daughter and her family are here to visit me and I adore them but my overwhelming sadness and feeling like life has no more importance for me, makes me withdrawn and just want to sleep. Am so tired and nauseous...don’t see a reason for me to be here!

Jenny1234567 profile image
Jenny1234567 in reply to

I completely understand my kids are here but I just can't even move I'm so sorry for what you are going through Minnie! I wish I knew how to stop it I can only tell you that you are not alone

in reply to Jenny1234567

My birthday is tomorrow and I just realized they have gifts for me. Because of my feelings of hopelessness and my extreme lack of self worth it is overwhelming to me. Don’t think I deserve them or their gifts! Just want these horrible feelings to STOP!

Jenny1234567 profile image
Jenny1234567 in reply to

Happy Birthday although I know it doesn't feel like it's happy. I am so sorry you feel undeserving I want it to stop for you and me both!

I’m sorry Jenny I have same things. And can’t get my reflux settled it added to it 10 fold. I’m starting a new med but such low dose because stomach can’t handle it so inflamed from it all the stress added to it. It started with meds. Are you seeing a Councellor? Maybe your mom can move into a care home? You have to take care of yourself first. I’m sorry about your sister I’m sure this threw you under the bus. I applaud you all for pulling together. You need a break somehow. Respite and time for yourself someone to help you with a plan. Maybe a call for help in the neighborhood. I tell my neighbors what I’m going through just to get a smile from them or a hand now & then. Can anyone take your kids for a nite every other weekend ?

Jenny1234567 profile image
Jenny1234567 in reply to

Guitara I am so sorry! I have no one here but my mom and sister and both are very ill. I wish I had someone to turn to but I am seeing a counselor though it's not enough I am still so damn depressed!

in reply to Jenny1234567

Could you ask your Councellor for referrals to support groups that are free. I have no one lol I get it

Jenny do you have a church you could ask for help? I can’t believe how hard it is to find help for us!!!

It will i promise, you will see the light at the end of the tunnel. You are strong and CAN get through this, feel free to message me, i deal with a lot of the same things. If you need someone to talk to message me, it may help to talk to someone, im no expert but it could help

letitbe222 profile image
letitbe222

Im sorry to hear this is happening to you. I have severe depression and my brain consistently thinks about suicides but my got my kids to live for and reminding me. Also zoloft is helping a lot. But i only just started having this for the pass 3 month doc said should take 6 m. To a year on medication. Lets see how it goes. Today is our anniversary and my husband is away so i feel extra depress. Wishing you luck

RissaSue profile image
RissaSue

I’ve been right where you are. Feeling like it would never end and I couldn’t take it anymore. It gets better. I promise. It WILL end. It takes some time and retraining your brain, but it gets better. Be patient and don’t give up. Hugs xo

I am battling my own anxiety since yesterday. Though I kept telling myself it will be over soon. Nothing last forever. Think positively even though I can mostly think of worst case scenarios. But never give up.

Zoloft/lexapro/celexa

These meds can change your life just stick with it. Sometimes battling anxiety untreated for a very long time can cause other health factors. You must control the fire before it spreads . Yes you weren't hoping for a comment like this but I'm just keeping it real . Do not be afraid to take medication we all have this anxiety as an illness so therefore you can take meds to help you. Just like having any other illness people need medication to help them get through

Mbroker27 profile image
Mbroker27

I hope it will go away. Talking to others who has similar symptoms is oat helpful. I have suffered for a long time. I can empathize with you. If you would like to communicate please write back. We can chat about about ways to lessen the pain. Would like to share with you.

Want2BHappy3 profile image
Want2BHappy3

I didn’t read anything about councling?

Kkimm profile image
Kkimm

It certainly will come to an end.

Have you seen your GP? Therapy and antidepressants could be very helpful for you.

Very best wishes

Kim

67anxiousgoat profile image
67anxiousgoat

I know exactly how you feel. I asked my Psychiatrist if he had ever had depression or anxiety and he said no. I said then you don't even know how your patients feel. He said no but I know they are in pain. To me that was like a light coming on. I never had thought of anxiety and depression as pain but it is. He went on to say that the area of the brain that malfunctions and gives us these terrible feelings is the same area that receives physical pain. The reason we want to sleep all the time is to escape this pain. Just as the other things we know we need to do but can't. We are in too much pain. A pain that if someone never experienced it can't imagine it even exists. There's no way to explain it to someone. The good news for you as I have found in the past. (17 years with this disorder) is the intensity of the pain that you are feeling now will not last. For me a good day is when the pain is barely noticeable and a spell of bad days are what you are in now. I know the feeling of how it takes all the strength you have to get up and go to work. There is nothing left for other issues such as you are experiencing . I don't know if you are religious or not but for me when I get that extreme I just talk to God and tell him You said You would not ever put more on us than we can stand and God I'm right there. He has never failed to remove just enough that I can go on. I'm not saying I'm all of a sudden happy go lucky.

Spooky99 profile image
Spooky99

Hi! Your not alone!! Last winter I was the same way!! My meds got changed. I’m much better!! See about your meds!!! I gained weight last year. Now I’m trying to loose it. But it will go away although it seems like forever and there is no sense of living. Just hang in there. Pray. Try to walk. It will pass and your not alone❤️

Mimi78 profile image
Mimi78

I am experiencing that exact same thing. I feel as though I am going crazy. I get scared to be alone in my head but at the same time I'm afraid to do anything. planning ahead gives me extreme anxiety. I am so tired I just want relief. I wish I had answers for you. You are not alone.

Jackyblue profile image
Jackyblue

It will end! I’m just coming through the same battle. I lost 20 lbs also. I could barely get off the couch for a couple of months. Working with my doctor, we finally came up with the right medication combination.

Hang on. It make take a couple of months, especially this time of year but, it will pass. It always does! ✌🏼♥️ You can fight

Mrspjsmom profile image
Mrspjsmom

With the right medication and support as well as a good therapist this will get better. You will learn tools and coping mechanisms that help. But it will take time and be a process of trial and error. Don't be discouraged though. Being on this forum is helpful because you are reaching out to people who have great suggestions. Things they have found helpful themselves. I will share three things that help me the most and hopefully they will help you too.

1. Every day chose one to three things you absolutely MUST do. They can be as simple as take a shower, eat and make a phone call. Even if you manage to do one of them you have accomplished something.

2. When your mind won't quiet down try to find a sound or something to concentrate on. I sometimes turn on a table fan and concentrate on the noise it makes. Or I concentrate on breathing. I take a deep breath in as I slowly count to three, hold the breath and count to three, then let it out slowly counting to three. Other thoughts may creep in. If they do that's ok. You can start over.

3. When you feel anxious, depressed and overwhelmed tell yourself "I am enough". Depression and anxiety often destroy any self esteem you have. Say this to yourself often. Each of us is unique and has something to offer the world. Something only we can offer. I have a hard time remembering that myself so I remind myself "I am enough".

HUGS and BLESSINGS!

Stu888 profile image
Stu888

Hi I’m also going through a bad period of anxiety at the moment and know what you mean by pushing people away. Try listening to the song weightless by Marconi Union. It’s an 8 minute meditation song that is supposed to reduce anxiety by 65% and helps me. Good luck!

Newbeginnings20 profile image
Newbeginnings20

Hey Jenny

I’m sorry I didn’t reply yesterday - it got very late x

I think so many people have given great advise to you. I understand you live in a remote area so difficult getting support.

I appreciate you do not have the NHS however is the a way that you could get carers in for your mom? X

JMB1989 profile image
JMB1989

I have been wanting to stay in bed all the time for several weeks. This is extremely the opposite of my norm. I have been in a depression and anxiety mode for about 4 months. When i am at work i seem to function well. I feel just horrid with this depression. The only peace i get is when sleeping. My waking hours are filled with sorrow, pain, and dread. So you are not alone.

Hisue profile image
Hisue

I have RA and with it -such pain,, fatigue, & anxiety,I feel like I could jump out of my skin & I need to pace, The anxiety even wakes me when I finally fall asleep. Taking lorazepam & Prozac - helping a little- temazepam for insomnia. It is awful.

TheHound profile image
TheHound

Yes. Turns out, I was just told I had GAD all these years.. Turns out it’s common to be misdiagnosed with that when you have OCD. Once I began treatment for that, I started feeling much better. It’s a very isolating feeling to feel anxious ALL the time. I was so depressed. Hang in there. Do you see a psychologist and psychiatrist?

Jenny1234567 profile image
Jenny1234567 in reply to TheHound

I see a psychiatrist and a counselor but it is not helping yet

W1a1s1h1y1y1a1 profile image
W1a1s1h1y1y1a1

Hi Jenny1234567, I have days like what you are describing and it seems like it is days and will never end. But don't give up the good fight, you are worth fighting for and this messed up world needs you. It will get easier and the periods will be less in duration and attacks. I am looking forward to the break from all of the nasty noise in my head, and I know if I keep fighting I will get a break. Hold on to all of us and I promise I won't let go, all of us can win we just need a helping hand or ear from each other. YOU are not ALONE, even though it feels like it all the time - this too shall pass. Love you girl - keep on keeping on we are with you even though we are faceless our heart is with you.

weegmack profile image
weegmack

It’s no wonder you feel so awful. You’re going though the most appalling time and I’m so sorry. It’s seems to be so unfair that everything hard in life comes at once. I’ve never been able to understand that. I can’t add to the advice and I know none of us can take away the pain of your circumstances. But it’s essential you get help. Meds will take time, but talking to the counsellor is the best thing. You can off-load all of this to them.

Is your mum entitled to any sort of home help? Xxx

Jenny1234567 profile image
Jenny1234567 in reply to weegmack

My mom is but will not take it because she lives in a very cluttered home and she is embarrassed

ChesterArthur21 profile image
ChesterArthur21

I've also experienced anxiety and depression throughout my life and this is what I have learned from various sources. This is anecdotal (meaning it applies to me and I don't know if it will apply to you), so please use it as an FYI.

1) If you are having anxiety and depression so much that you are taking off from work, you need to get yourself to a psychiatrist/therapist. If you have a tooth ache you go to a dentist, if you have depression and anxiety, you go to a psychiatrist/therapist.

2) Medications can be your friend if used correctly. Anti-depressants/anti-anxiety medications are much better than in the past. If you have a tooth infection, you take the antibiotics that the dentist prescribes. No stigma taking anti-depressants/anti-anxiety medication if you have a problem.

3) Some people (including me) find that eating sweets give a temporary high but a lot worse low over the medium to long term. Staying away from sugar (as in sucrose) may make you feel better.

4) Except in extreme cases, your feelings when you are anxious/depressed are much scarier than reality.

5) When you feel anxious, rather than saying "I'm anxious," say "Jenny1234567 is anxious," as if you are another person analyzing yourself. Then ask "Why?". If it's because you are self conscious, look around yourself and see if anybody is actually looking at you. Most of the time you will find that your anxieties and reality are different.

I hope you feel better soon!

cmore profile image
cmore

This too shall pass! Just keep trying until you find the right doctor and right medication. We live in a time when we are finally making major strides in understanding the brain. Go to Onemind.org on the internet.

Dback profile image
Dback

Please get some professionaI help as soon as possible, I was exactly where you were..I found a Licensed Nurse Practitioner in Psychiatry that was able to counsel me and help find medication that worked for me, please, don't go it alone...seek help, you are worth it and don't need to suffer💓

JumpingFrog profile image
JumpingFrog

What your feeling is normal, I say normal as your not alone, I have felt like that and agree it's not nice, but I have got better and still am, sometimes I fall back into depression but I know I can find ways to help me beat it, It's no quick fix but things do get better. Be patient and find what it is that puts you in control again.

Windyred profile image
Windyred

Jenny,

I am so sorry you are going through so much right now. My counselor has told me and I’ve experienced this first hand that sometimes anxiety and depression occur because we are not dealing with grief. Just a thought, and a scary one I know, but you have a lot of sad things happening to you right now. You might think about whether you are actually processing the grief. It’s our natural tendency to just keep going, keep pushing through but your body may be telling you to stop and feel these things. Journaling and prayer helps me tremendously and I am learning that once I let out my sadness and anger, I do feel better.

Anyway I’ll pray your situation improves quickly. Please keep us updated on how you’re doing!!

Minnie1971 profile image
Minnie1971

Hi Jenny,

I went through what you are describing more than a few times. I couldn't take it anymore therefore I went to see a Psychiatrist. I was told that I had depression and anxiety. No kidding.

I was prescribed Zoloft and spent nine years pretty much manic.

It wasn't until fifteen years after the first diagnosis that I was diagnosed with Bipolar 1 and was told that my depression and anxiety with agitation was actually a mixed state.

These are very painful and I almost didn't make it through the last one. Now I am on medication that works fairly well but it isn't a panacea.

I still have some depression and of course all the side effects from the medications. It isn't perfect but it's certainly better than the way I was.

In no way Jennifer am I suggesting that you have Bipolar 1 but I would urge you to see a doctor. If you don't like that first doctor find another one.

Good luck and please let us know how you are doing there is always help out there!

This sounds like a lot of depression. Maybe you can start with your primary care de and let her know how overwhelmed you feel. Good luck to you

Rob7 profile image
Rob7

Jenny I too went thru a terrible bout of anxiety last winter - very similar to what you are describing. What got me to where I am now - 90% better is (1) medication - lexapro (2) CBT (3) dealing with the issue of where my fear was coming from and (4) time to heal my nervous system - 6 months.

(5) Faith in my SaviorJesus.

All anxiety is at its core is fear. You must identify that fear and then take away its power over you.

HisDaughter profile image
HisDaughter

I am sorry about you feel and what you are going through! As you can tell, you are not the only one who struggle. We need to help ourselves by doing what is necessary for our well being. I know it's hard. I struggle with depression too and with several other problems. I would recommend to you getting therapy if you aren't already. We need that someone provides us guidance with what we suffer. I am glad you have found some support here. Do not give up! I prayed that God blesses you.

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