ECT week 2

[nicetry]

Started second week of ECT this morning. I think I’d fooled myself into thinking I was feeling better but today as I was lying in the bed waiting for treatment I just started crying. When I woke up I started crying again, and almost the whole way home. I felt/feel an overwhelming hopelessness, and am asking myself “wtf has happened to my life?” The way my life used to be keeps getting further & further in the rear view mirror.

As far as side effects from ECT, the headaches have been relentless. Also some mild memory loss — I’m a Pilates and yoga instructor & the other day was teaching & realized I’d done the same pose about six times in a row lol.

My husband has a HUGE family and I’m trying to think of excuses to not attend Thanksgiving dinner — too many people makes me shut down. I get tired of telling everyone “I’m fine” when I’m not. Also this will be the first holiday since my dad entered assisted living & I’m worried about him falling or forgetting stuff or people. I can barely be responsible for myself, much less my dad.

[Coloradowalker]

I’m so sorry you aren’t yet feeling relief with the treatment. I understand that it can take a while. And holidays can be tough even when you do feel well. I will continue to keep you in my thoughts❤️❤️

[All_alone]

You are definitely going thru a lot right now. Have you considered having a quiet Thanksgiving at home just you and your husband?

I was invited to a dinner that will have almost 30 people - I declined. Way too much for me.

[NWGal]

Besides the aftereffects of ECT it sounds like you are overwhelmed. Maybe its a good time to bypass the usual Thanksgiving oversocialization. The anxiety associated with all this is causing you intense emotional upheaval. We're here for you sweetie.