The floodgates opened

So my boss got upset at something I said in an email and confronted me about it. I told her I didn’t mean it like that and she just kept pushing at me that i did until I broke down crying and I haven’t been able to stop for HOURS which made her feel bad. I told her a bunch of personal stuff including I suffer from depression and anxiety and I have so much stress from my stupid marriage and basically being a single mom for my girls. I guess it clarified and cleared up somethings like why I am kind of anti social. Because I feel like crying everyday and I don’t know if I can control it like today. I just want to stop crying.

[LibraryLove]

Hey, I'm really sorry that happened to you and work and the stress you are under as a single mom. I can't imagine what you are feeling. It was very brave of you to explain yourself to your boss, especially on that personal of a level. Not many bosses will take the time to hear our their employees and what they are going through. (It happened to me. I was working two jobs and 50 hours a week and barely made enough to cover my bills, and I was depressed and anxious from the stress, and my boss told me the reason why I was tired all the time from hanging out with my friends all night. I was so upset I talked to the assistant director about it who went in to talk to my boss to remind her I work two jobs and that I don't have time to do things like that. My boss never apologized for what she said).

I hope your boss is understanding for you. It can make life all that much harder when you don't have a good boss.

Someone said to me recently that crying is a natural response to stress and anxiety. I'm still working on accepting this as well, but don't feel ashamed that you are crying because of a stressful time. It's natural emotional release. If you are able you might be able to benefit from talking to a counselor or if you can't, talk to a friend or a family member, just to have that reminder you aren't alone and you have someone who is on your side and can help you out.

Hang in there. <3 <3 <3

[Hidden in reply to LibraryLove]

Thank you. I don’t have anyone to talk to. I guess that is why I’m on this site. My boss said to take a day to work from home and get therapy. Maybe I’ll take her up on it. I guess I have a lot to get out because I’m still crying but I have to pick up my girls soon and they can’t see me cry.

[LibraryLove in reply to Hidden]

I understand. I'm glad your boss gave you a day away from work. Having even a single day off can be really beneficial. Mostly everyone needs a therapist. A therapist named Kati Morton said that. She makes Youtube videos about therapy and mental health, and she's got a couple of great ones that talk about how to find the right therapist, what to expect from your first appointment, what to do if you can't afford it, etc.

Maybe you can try and do something fun with your girls, like a movie night? I understand why they can't see you cry, especially if they're little. But doing something small and fun together might help take your mind off of things and just feel that family love again.

[purposelife]

Hugs. Sorry you had a rough day. Writing correspondence can be misinterpret. That's good you where able to talk with your boss about what you're going through. Seeing a therapist might be a good idea. Wishing you better days ahead. Take care

[Hidden in reply to purposelife]

Thanks. I apologized and tried to explain but she kept pushing even though I said some things are personal. She has done something like this before. I think I just need to find a better fit for my personality as I’m a very good employee but not the most social bc of my depression and anxiety.

[purposelife in reply to Hidden]

Yw. Does your company/position have a telecommute option allowing you to work from home? If not, there are quite a few companies out there that hire virtual employees. Blessings

[Tikirob]

Life is filled with unnecessary hurt. There are tides of anger floating all around us. Your boss was the last person to push you around into finally yelling help. My guess is that you are not getting enough of it in your life. You probably are giving more of it to others than you can to yourself. It’s my humble opinion that people with depression and anxiety are poor at asking or giving themselves help. For others we are good but for ourselves it seems impossible and also pointless. So today you acknowledged that need for help, the need to cry, you opened a reserve of sadness that has been just filling and filling up. You spoke to someone about your troubles and that’s an amazing start. You are here on this dialogue community reaching out and that’s great too. I don’t want you to cry so much but maybe you need to. Take a moment to be kind and caring to yourself. Sounds like you have a lot of tough stuff going on, it’s okay to let it out and feel bad. Let us be your shoulders to cry on.