Peaceful Living

[JudesBallet1983]

I'm been struggling with anxiety my entire life. Even as a child I can remember being worried about everything. It's so difficult and exhausting to constantly worry and get your mind to relax. I lost my son three years ago and the anxiety is just above and beyond at this point.

[BonnieSue]

Please accept my condolences at your great loss of your son. I can't pretend to know what this is like. I know how difficult it was to drive away when my husband and I dropped our oldest son off at the Naval enlistment office to begin his years with the Navy at 19 years of age. I was gripped with pain in my womb and I'm not prone to artificial pains. How much greater is your pain! I am so sorry!

Have you given any thought to seeing a doctor for treatment of your anxiety? By your statement it's reached levels where it must be treated and brought under control. There is medicine and also non-drug choices you can make to bring it under control. I have a long list of resources if you'd like me to print it here for you let me know. These are things other people here on this site have found helped them. Take care of you, please. I know that can be exhausting right now, I hope you have somebody to trust to do that for you.

[JudesBallet1983 in reply to BonnieSue]

Thank you so much. I'd love a printed list of resources. I've tried grief counseling but I never seemed to get a plan on how to cope. I was just told that it will get better. It has not gotten better. I miss him like it was just yesterday.

[BonnieSue in reply to JudesBallet1983]

Yes, I can imagine how you must miss him. A parent should never outlive their child and will never forget their loss. There must be a way that time dulls the pain but everyone is different.

Some natural remedies and non-drug sources of information are books, videos, and workbooks suggested by other people on this site:

1---"I've found David D. Burns' "Feeling Good" and "When Panic Attacks" to be very helpful."

2---"I am working through the anxiety workbook by Dr David Carbonell and it has helped immensely!!! " His website is anxietycoach.com.

3---Mindfulness has helped many people and is now recommended by doctors in the UK. Here’s just 1 link that explains it’s usefulness: heartwoodrefuge.org/benefit.... Another option of many is called MINDSHIFT. You can download it to your phone from Google Playstore.

4---TRE (Trauma releasing exercises) is something you can learn in a class but you don't have to talk about your problems and once you have learned the technique you can use it at home.

5---"A good book that I came across recently is "The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook, 6th Edition" by Edmund J. Bourne, PhD. You might find this book to be of some help to you, although communicating your thoughts and feelings in a group setting is enormously helpful as well. "

6---“The book DARE, which is about anxiety. It’s a very good book about accepting anxiety and letting go of the fear. The author is Barry Mcdonagh and he also has a YouTube channel and a Facebook support group.”

7---For anxiety: Claire Weekes audio books on iTunes. “Self Held for Your Nerves” is one title that is good. You can see her on YouTube. “The Dr. Claire Weekes book is easy to understand and will help you on your way to recovery through acceptance.”

8---Another really good CD and book is the Linden method.

9---How to be good with yourself: self-compassion.org/the-thr...10---Try the meditation app called Headspace. It's done in 10 mins slots once a day.

10---Videos on YouTube by THAT ANXIETY GUY helps with anxiety re: depersonalization/ de-realization states.

11—For UK residents: Have you ever been in touch with the organisation called MIND? They offer one to one sessions with a Project Worker free. They also run courses that you can attend free of charge. One of the courses is about Anxiety. Their website is mind.org.uk

12---"Go on the Psychology Today site and look for a therapist that specializes in anxiety." Psychology Today has listings with psychiatrists and psychologists and therapists with their pictures and the therapists’ specialties and philosophies, sliding scale fees if they have them, education and insurance accepted and other details they choose to post for you.

13---Instead of mercilessly judging and criticizing yourself for various inadequacies or shortcomings, self-compassion means you are kind and understanding when confronted with personal failings – after all, who ever said you were supposed to be perfect? self-compassion.org/the-thr...

14---“Have you ever listened to Louise Hay on YouTube? Some of the talks help motivate you and hopefully you will feel a positive energy.”

15---“I called one of these online therapist sites. The therapist was really good. It was prestoexperts dot com. Her name was Lori Burke. Definitely a professional and she got me through this awful depression/anxiety morning.” (There is a charge for this service)

16---For meditation look at:

Tara Brach and Chopra Center

17---theworrygames.com/anxiety-f...

18---“AnxietyNoMore” by Paul Bywater. A phone app.

19---“At Last a Life” book by Paul David.

20---The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook

Practical DBT Exercises for Learning Mindfulness, Interpersonal Effectiveness, Emotion Regulation, and Distress Tolerance

By: Matthew McKay PhD, Jeffrey Wood PsyD, Jeffrey Brantley MD

A Clear and Effective Approach to Learning DBT Skills

First developed for treating borderline personality disorder, dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) has proven effective as treatment for a range of other mental health problems, especially for those characterized by overwhelming emotions. Research shows that DBT can improve your ability to handle distress without losing control and acting destructively. In order to make use of these techniques, you need to build skills in four key areas-distress tolerance, mindfulness, emotion regulation, and interpersonal effectiveness.

Source: NewHarbingerPublications

Caution for non-Buddhists: Zen Buddhism inspired aspects of DBT, along with behavioral science and dialectical philosophy. Source: GoodTherapy.com.

[Jojo83de]

Hi I'm really really sorry to hear that I had my first miscarriage last year but luckily it didn't happen at 4 months etc I think It would have been much harder for me. I can relate even as a child I was a nervous anxious child very negative. But the anxiety worsened into a severe anxiety that I can't control. I've tried several medications anti anxiety drugs sleeping tabs with antidepressants etc. I had mindfulness apparently that was no good as I can't focus on the present. I find I can't concentrate on anything I'm scared of anyone and everyone. It's hyperawareness of everything and noises I can't stand anything too loud it makes my head go. I'm hoping to have treatment with PTSD specialists soon. I see a psychotherapist every 2weeks and I don't take much medication anymore as the medication wasn't doing anything and plus I couldn't take all this medication when I was pregnant. What medication are you taking if any? And can you see a PTSD specialist where you are? Really wishing you all the best. Jo-Anne

[Blush311]

Hi I know the feeling , I start ing noticing my anxiety when my mom pass three years ago, sometimes it takes something major to happen in ur life to trigger it. I hate the fact that I'm always thinking and worry but I have to find something that relaxes you

[Blush311]

Right, and I'm so sorry about ur son

[gogogirl]

I am so sorry. Sometimes therapists think it is easy to move forward, but there is nothing like a support group. I have been looking for one for a long time.