feeling lost: just diagnosed with... - CHADD's Adult ADH...

CHADD's Adult ADHD Support

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feeling lost

Life-drawer profile image
13 Replies

just diagnosed with inattentive adhd at 34. I have friends who have it and I recently realized I might have had it my whole life as well. There are so so many resources out there I am not sure where to start. I have set up appointments with a new med provider, my primary care, and will be talking to my therapist more about this in the future. Trying to have hope things will improve in the future with a formal diagnosis. Looking for any recs at all on books, how to find a support group, how to help an undiagnosed family member, etc etc. Mostly here to absorb but also wanted to say hello to others with this shared life experience.

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Life-drawer profile image
Life-drawer
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13 Replies
STEM_Dad profile image
STEM_Dad

Welcome to the community Life-drawer !

(Is that "drawer" as in a dresser drawer or kitchen drawer, or as in "someone who draws"?)

There's a lot to learn about ADHD, and it takes time to get all support that you need in place.

I suggest that you journal about your experiences, past and present, looking through the lens of how ADHD has affected you, your life, your education & work, and your relationships. If your bring the journal with you to therapy and doctor appointments, it can help you to relate what you need to say to your care providers.

I also highly recommend also journaling about your experiences on any ADHD medications for at least the first few days. That way, it's easier to tell your doctor how the meds are working, any side effects, etc.

As for how to bring up with an undiagnosed family member, it depends a lot on what their own impressions are about ADHD. For many people, it helps to talk about the symptoms and traits, and the effect they have on life, instead of starting with the name ADHD or any medical terminology related to it.

• We humans are social beings. We are connected by experiences. Find commonality in your experiences, and build up the conversation from there.

Life-drawer profile image
Life-drawer in reply toSTEM_Dad

Drawer as in one who draws 🙂 I appreciate all your thoughts. I bought a journal and have been documenting med reaction but I also plan on journaling out experiences as you suggested.

Ampersand1 profile image
Ampersand1

Welcome!! You found a support group, well done!

I was diagnosed at 32 and am 34 now myself, predominantly inattentive type. I'll keep this short but I was massively overwhelmed by resources too. I read (or listened to books) everything I could on the topic of ADHD. Two books stand out though. Driven from distraction by John ratey and Ed hallowell was a breakthrough book for my science curious brain. The next one is kinda weird but it's called "the disorganized mind" by Nancy ratey.

I learned there are other things in my life that were triggering my ADHD, and these books gave me a new look around me to see what's possible/reasonable to change in my life.

Wishing you the very best and happy you're here.

Life-drawer profile image
Life-drawer in reply toAmpersand1

Thank you for the encouragement and book recs!

LisethHIS profile image
LisethHIS

Hi Life-drawer,

Thank you for contacting CHADD National Resource Center on ADHD. I am glad you found this community. We have support groups here at Chadd, many are virtual, you can join one that works best for you. Here's the link and the support groups are free to join. chadd.org/affiliate-locator/ Here's a link to a podcast you can listen when you get some free time. podcasts.chadd.org/e/is-it-... and an article you can read. chadd.org/adhd-news/adhd-ne...

If you have further questions, please let us know. We are here to help!

Best Regards,

Liseth

Health Information Specialist

CHADD’s National Resource Center on ADHD chadd.org

FocusAndFlow profile image
FocusAndFlow

In all seriousness, and with absolutely no hint of humor nor sarcasm: Please do yourself the best favor you can, get up right now, put on some tennis shoes and go for a minimum 20 minute walk outside with sunlight on your face.

Move multiple times per day. Start there, which will help clear your head and make you feel a bit better, then approaching this diagnosis, resources, researching suggestions, etc. will be easier to organize and it will feel less stressful, etc.

Just move. You don't have to be an olympian, you don't have to take anything with you to listen to. Listen to the leaves through the wind in the trees if you have a park nearby, or drive to one if you don't, and let your thoughts just cycle through that sound and they will start fallign into place and you will feel better.

Conversely, if you're an avid exerciser, you're already doing the right thing and I commend you for it. Just move. The body heals the mind, one bit at a time.

Life-drawer profile image
Life-drawer in reply toFocusAndFlow

I went for my first run in a long time the other day. Looking forward to moving more!

FocusAndFlow profile image
FocusAndFlow in reply toLife-drawer

Nice! Now, I would strongly suggest you go on Amazon, or go to the store, and find a small, little notebook to use as a daily diary / task list / time keeping device. No apps, no computer, no screens; just you, a pen and that little black book. Start jotting down in there your daily activities and watch it morph into a daily itinerary. You'll get used to it in a month or so and you will start time-boxing tasks, and setting priorities better.

My point is, there is no reason whatsoever why you cannot get in at least a 12 minute walk every day. Make it a habit. I know it's hard. Don't focus on running, losing weight, looking better, etc. Just get moving and be kind to yourself while you're doing that. Jot it down on your list. Draw a line through it when it's done. Feel the satifsaction.

Life Legos.

You're doing great. Godspeed,

P.

Mamamichl profile image
Mamamichl

welcome!

It is a lot to take in. Start with you tube channels and the books written by the same people. My two favorite are howtoadhd (with her book by the same name), and adhd_love with their book “dirty laundry”.

When you talk with your doctor, ask for a genesight test. If you decide the medication route, you and your doc will know where to start rather than taking a shot in the dark. It helps with all mental health meds, and you can cross reference it with your insurance to find the one that works with your insurance.

I’m always looking for support groups. There’s a few on Facebook but like other groups,it’s hit and miss.

Life-drawer profile image
Life-drawer in reply toMamamichl

I had a genesight test in the past and had no idea adhd meds were on there. THANK YOU

Mamamichl profile image
Mamamichl in reply toLife-drawer

So glad I could help! Now to figure out the cost… it showed up as over $5k but my insurance hasn’t covered it yet. My doc did a prior auth but maybe not to the right insurance.

Mastiffmama profile image
Mastiffmama

has anyone responded back to provide you a support group? If yes, can you pass on the info., as I’m interested, too. I was diagnosed in 2020 in my 50’s and feel like I always had it. I wish I knew when I was younger because I didn’t feel very smart as an adolescent.

Life-drawer profile image
Life-drawer in reply toMastiffmama

an earlier reply from the chadd affiliate program is the only support group link I received.

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