ADHD diagnosis and medication worries

[Maybeadhd]

Hi there, I'm a 24yo female with undiagnosed but suspected ADHD. Throughout my childhood I've had OCD, anxiety and in adult life live with PTSD and anxiety. I've always masked my symptoms to friends and family, even as a child. For example, having trouble regulating emotion but internalizing it or turning them to hidden OCD behaviours. I put quite a bit of pressure on myself to succeed and can be very task focused. However in the last 2 years, it's becoming harder for me to regulate and sometimes having the constant 10 thoughts in my head at once is exhausting. I find myself getting extremely happy and extremely sad very easily and float between intense task and reward focus, or unable to start one thing at all.

However, I do like/am very used to the fact I can function much of the time to a high level with my ability to multitask a lot of things at once. For example, good days at work I can do a lot more than some other people, who do one thing at once. I'm worried with medication that it will stop that completely and remove that handy part of my brain. I was wondering if anyone has experienced this, and is there a therapy or medication out there that can quiet thoughts or simplify processes for those unbearable overwhelming moments? I currently cope with physical stimulating movements to let off that brain energy but it's not super effective.

Thank you for reading and appreciate any advice or support!

[Gettingittogether]

Your worry is off base. The medicines aren't that dang powerful. You take a med and ADHD meds last a day. So you try it for a month or so and you report results to your provider. Provider considers and adjusts or not and you go forward. You keep this cycle going.

Meaning at any point if you feel you are hurt by the meds, you tell your provider. Provider adjusts dose or suggests some tips and you go from there.

You really don't want to agonize over decision that you can reverse at any time. And to treat ADHD well, you have to learn that trial and error is the only way. You have to try a a med and try it at different doses and maybe different times of day ... and you need to do all you can on your own ... and then see what happens.

BTW: I will tell you that there is anxiety and/or depression in the question. Or maybe OCD like you report. Agonizing over decisions that don't lock you in and that you can reverse at any time---that's what depression makes my mind (at least) do. And I'm worried that this is the case for you. Also anxiety can do that.

Have you been checked for any of those issues--or for the OCD. Any treatment, therapeutic or medical on the OCD?

[Maybeadhd in reply to Gettingittogether]

Thanks for your comment. I think I made it sound like I was more worried than I am. Definitely not agonizing over anything! More just a question in my head. And no, o definitely don't meet any DSM for OCD anymore, it was a childhood thing that o now longer experience. I've also been assessed for depression and again this isn't something I live with. PTSD is for a separate thing entirely which I do have therapy for. Thanks for letting me know about the meds and the way they work, I wasn't fully aware of this. I agree, if I was medicated it would certainly be a trial and error kind of process! Appreciate the comment.

[STEM_Dad in reply to Maybeadhd]

For me, decision making got a lot easier once I started on ADHD medication. I used to describe myself as having "persistent indecisiveness". Even with my medication and helpful as it is, I still struggle with indecisiveness (more as a habit, or when feeling anxious over a decision, like I am now about having to replace my car).

A common experience for people with ADHD (though not all of us) is "analysis paralysis". We might become hyperfocused on the details or on information gathering, instead of making a decision, even if it seems like it should be an easy decision to make.

I'm one of those who constantly feels like I need to gather more information. I believe it's because the hunt triggers dopamine release, while making a decision will bring an end to the dopamine release (though it might make me feel better in other ways, like feeling less anxious).

[Maybeadhd in reply to STEM_Dad]

Thanks for your comment! That's actually true, indecisiveness can be hard and I'm also one to information gather. It's good hearing from someone who gets it!

[El-Eektrified]

hello, welcome to this forum!

The first thing that comes to mind… did you have a psychiatric evaluation in the past?

Since you are describing ptsd, anxiety / ocd? which also are disorders that have overlaps with ADHD/ASD symptoms, but also bi-polar disorder.

If I were in your shoes, Id probably try to find a psychiatrist that can evaluate and treat the symptoms that are making life difficult.

The only way to find out if meds work, and what they can possibly mean to you, is to try them under supervision of a professional.

[Maybeadhd]

Thanks for your comment! Yes, I've been assessed for things including OCD, depression, bipolar etc and I don't meet any other than anxiety and PTSD. I do get therapy for these things. I've not been assessed for ADHD/ASD though, I'd need to see a different specialist. I guess that's the thing with so many overlaps, it's hard to tell other than with a professional!

[El-Eektrified in reply to Maybeadhd]

Tnx! story of my life! 😂 I know how hard it is to find someone that really understands what’s up… but it does help when you get some kind of an explanation… For me vyvanse and intuniv were the best combo to help me with my ADHD. And I still am “me” don’t think it really changed my drive to do stuff, except I’m not jumping around all the time anymore 🤣

[Maybeadhd in reply to El-Eektrified]

Amazing! Thank you so much for sharing what works for you. I'd obviously go through my own trial and error but it's good to hear what's worked for you and the way it's helped and not changed too much!

[Wasted71years]

If it did turn out that medication helped you, was the right dose, but did impact some set of characteristics that you didn't want to lose permanently, you could always pick days to skip the medication and focus on using those characteristics.

For me, medication has not taken away anything.

Work with the doctor helping you find the right medication, mention any characteristic you think is impacted and they can work with you to find an even better treatment.

[Maybeadhd in reply to Wasted71years]

Thanks for your advice. It's reassure Ng to hear it's not changed you as such, only helped the parts you need support with on the days you need. Thank you, appreciate it!

[Knitting20projects]

Not sure if this is useful, but I would want to feel like a more functional, “improved” version of myself on medication. If I felt really anxious (unless it was a temporary effect that a Dr said would resolve permanently in a specific timeframe), sedated, or like I was no longer “me”, I wouldn’t want to be on that medicine.