What is it with major companies that won't help with any kind of accommadations? My son (23) worked for a major company. He worked by himself alot where they loaded boxes into semis. If he needed help he could call on his radio but alot of times no one would answer, He'd get highly frustrated when all the alarms and lights would go off. Anxiety would set in thinking he was going to lose his job. He's not the type that can tell himself "I'm doing my best" no matter how many times I would try to tell him he's only one person.
Fast forward to another company. Last 4 months were going great and he loves his job. Employer knows of his ADHD- possibly high functioning autism as well. His scanner wasn't working so they brought him a new one. The second one was working slow. Boss said "It could be the Wi-fi today" BUT.. if his rate is down like it was that day he'll be fired. My son has also reminded him of his ADHD and the boss says "We have to treat everyone equally"
I know he's not a slacker. He leaves for work 2 hours early and always asks if he can work on his days off, but something has to give with these major companies. I've called OVR-The ADA and JAN-
Their strenous jobs which he loves- 4/10's with alot of walking. All he's asking is to cut him alittle slack.
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There is widespread ignorance and bias about ADHD throughout society. Some think it is a failure of will power. Some think it is behavioral problems exacerbated by lax supervision. All those who think it is volitional or something that could be fixed if someone really tried, are not sympathetic in their heart to accommodations.
Even when company policies or laws require a business to provide accommodations, if in their hearts they don't believe your son is an innocent victim of this neurodevelopmental condition, they are only grudgingly providing assistance. That means sudden unpredictable and unreasonable reactions which seem to come out of nowhere.
People and their biases are very hard to change. Discriminatory behavior exists in spite of laws, culture and decades of attempt to eliminate it. About the best we can do for ourselves or loved ones with ADHD is to try to find situations that need fewer accommodations and develop means to lessen the friction. Coworkers will still resent what they see as advantages given to your son.
Companies will claim they treat everyone the same, which is both good and bad. If you refuse to hire anyone who is blind or who has mobility issues because you treat everyone the same . . . not so good. On the other hand, if the job is driving a truck then eyesight is a valid requirement.
You can have productivity standards applied to everyone unfortunately, which can be used to exclude people of diverse backgrounds but also has some validity. A grey area. Companies that are committed to diversity can find jobs or sets of assignments that work with the unique limitations of employees, so that they can provide productive value to the organization, while companies that truly aren't interested can apply approaches, job definitions and processes that guarantee they only have a homogenous workforce.
With the right upper management or immediate management chain, your son could succeed and thrive. With lip service accommodation or none at all, it is all down to how well your son can work out ways to work harder than his coworkers to deliver the same results because he is going the job with a hand tied behind his back.
I have a 12 year old with ADHD who was recently diagnosed with mild autism (diagnosis delayed by COVID & family overwhelm because our daughter has autism & significant intellectual disability & care needs). Anyway, I saw your post and wanted to encourage you, if possible, to get him a formal diagnostic evaluation for autism. (I know finances can prevent this bc insurance sometimes won’t cover this evaluation for adults). I say this because an autism diagnosis has much more “push” for an employer, I think, than ADHD will. I would also consider reaching out to your county’s community centered board that assists people with disabilities. They might have recommendations for additional resources to help advocate for accommodations. As a parent of 2 kids with autism, when I heard about his low frustration tolerance for alarms & lights, particularly if he’s already a little frustrated or struggling to solve a problem—-it was very evocative for me about my kids. I don’t know if this is helpful. My only other comment is that I kept getting so annoyed with our son for years, thinking why can’t he just chill out, not get so annoyed, & I kept thinking he was irritable. Actually, he just has very poor problem solving skills. He has 1 solution to a problem. If that solution doesn’t work, he panics, freezes, and can’t cope. That’s more than ADHD, which is why I’m asking. Best wishes for you and your wonderful son.
Unfortunately, it's not about the work. if you are different, think and word faster and have success. They are often threatened or just think you are weird and get rid of you.
Welcome to the world of politics, and patriarchy, fight for control no matter what managers will do to save their job including lying, gaslighting, and putting down the ADHD woman as an easy target, or scapegoat. I have experienced it all the past 25 years and it's demoralizing.
I am highly educated ( 3 degrees and 20 plus certifications) and a highly seasoned leadership development facilitator, Coach and, transformation consultant. I have been working since i was 22.
I was laid off by 2 ad agencies due to the recession.
Pushed out from the children's health foundation, the government of Ontario, the city of Edmonton, gov of Alberta, St. Paul's hospital
fired from an mgmt consulting firm, workers' compensation board, united way and ICBC .
I had to sell 50,000 RRSP's and my house to afford rent during the times I had no work.
Because I did excellent work, they had to spend 2 years each time picking away at any small thing i did to document enough to fire me and then just say "I didn't fit in"
I had no idea, why i kept failing over and over and over. No matter how hard I worked. The same for my two relationships and groups of friends or skating/rowing clubs.
As you can imagine my confidence is at 0 and I am skilled in this field. I would give anything to get married to my true love and have a home paid for, vacations and friends to hang out with every weekend. etc etc.
And I couldn't even get approved for the 8000 tax relief credit, the way it's worded on the form, my doctor didn't feel comfortable signing that I was incapable of dressing myself.
You are welcome to take over the mediation from ICBC or St. Paul's Hospital which could create precedence for everyone. I spent 6500.00 on the lawyer and owe him another 6500 and we haven't done mediation yet.
One thing that worked amazingly this year is neurofeedback and stimulants. i am so grateful for both of them. It did however cost me over 15, 000 as none is covered by benefits.
Good luck changing the corporate world. The rolling of eyes and denying accommodation, ostracization, laughing and gas lighting is awful. But they get away with it because they have money and they just put on our Record of employment that we quit to void them of all responsibility. And I am not one to sit around and not do anything about it. But, unless you have power or money. it's a losing game.
Selling my apartment furniture to move back to my hometown and rent a room somewhere and take 2 on opening another business.
I would love to connect with other adhd late-diagnosed women ( double exceptional) to create. friendships and cheer each other on. Chantal
Has your son gotten a note from his doctor? Often a doctor's note requesting a Reasonable Accommodations will help. You son also needs to make these requests are in writing. Be sure he keeps a copy for himself.
yes..I'm hoping it's not too late. He came home today from work stating his boss will let him know if he has a job or not on Wednesday. He's not making the rate they are asking for. Planning on calling OVR Monday. and his recruiter
I’m sorry your son has struggled receiving the support he needs and deserves at work. If his diagnosis has been confirmed by a MD, he should qualify for work accommodations, as per the federal Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) which covers individuals with ADHD (archive.ada.gov/regs2016/fi.... It may require advocacy and effort, however you can learn more here: askjan.org/ and: additudemag.com/workplace-l...
I’m not sure what county or state you or your son are in, however, it maybe worth investigating. If his employer does not adhere to “reasonable accommodations”, employer maybe liable.
As a mother of a adult son with ADHD I feel you. Have you gotten anywhere with the organizations you contacted? Ultimately it requires activism for workers rights to change policy. The large corporations have bought and paid for their unfettered ability to take profit over people.
I stopped buying whenever possible from large corporations especially from the one I think you are referring to and buy as local as possible.
Until enough people understand they have the power to change things we will fight injustices in all aspects of our lives.
The last company he worked for started with an "A". ;). Worse place to work even without disabilities..His new place (U) they just gather boxes 100 an hour and get them ready to load on the semis.
I plan to call ADA and OVR on Monday
His therapist already sent the company a letter but that didn't do anything.
That absolutely sucks. Two things to know: 1) your workplace isn't required to provide accommodations for ADHS (yes, that sucks), but 2) they are required to provide accommodations for autism. Does he have an "official" diagnosis? If not, y'all should look into that. In general, without an official diagnosis, they won't accommodate. Sadly, if the law doesn't require that they accommodate for something then companies won't do it - it potentially costs them more money and destroys their fantasy of "equal treatment." I haven't revealed my ADHD diagnosis to my current employer because it gets me nothing but potential scrutiny which I don't want. Good luck with this - your son obviously deserves better.
That's good to know. He should officially request accommodations from his employer for both diagnoses - I don't think they can deny it unless they're under 15 employees. You inspired me to do a bunch of reading - thank you! Also, requests for accommodations don't have to be in writing, although I would definitely request in writing so you have proof and if they deny, I would want that in writing, too. Best of luck! This is really upsetting, as I know y'all know. All the bazillion complaints we hear about people not wanting to work and on and on - so frustrating.
It's very frustrating because he never calls off and goes to work an hour early. He could sit at home and collect disability. SSI- I recently called OVR because his boss told him he can't have any accommadations- that they have to treat everyone the same which we know is not true. Definitly have more than 50 employees- 5 were let go for the same reason, not making rate last week. Seems some managers don't know about ADA-
My son with autism (Asperger’s essentially but they no longer use that term) and ADHD is getting excellent quality therapy from a speech therapist who helps him with perspective taking, social skills, etc. I can’t guarantee it’s making a huge difference but I think it’s worth trying. Maybe someone like this would be an option. I don’t know about in the adult world, but it’s worth asking if someone trained in “pragmatic communication” or “social communication” who’s a speech therapist would see your son. Even before he has had an autism evaluation, if he scores below average on the pragmatic communication testing, they can potentially make a case for insurance to cover speech therapy directed at those skills. It’s interesting that you mention he mostly works alone. Not sure if this is part of the job or his inclination. Again, many people with ADHD are quite social & interactive. If anything, we tend to do too much socializing at work! That’s why I would really pursue his social skills deficits if they exist. They’re truly a brain difference and can really derail a person’s work success, regardless of IQ, degrees, resume, etc. If you can’t “read the room”, interpret others’ perspectives, understand other’s’ expectations, etc, then you really risk losing jobs repeatedly because you struggle so significantly with regular social interactions. And that’s not typically why people with purely ADHD change jobs often. They change because they get bored, arrive late, are time blind, talk when they should be working, procrastinate, etc. I hope this helps and doesn’t feel critical.
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