My second post: I want to learn from you. I want to finally belong

[JimDaydreamer]

I was diagnosed in summer of 2015. I have always know that I am different just couldn't pin point what it was. Even after the diagnosis I had my doubts that my prob is ADD. I started my journey with Psychiatrists in 2004 . My cluster : Social anxiety, obsessive compulsive personality disorder, GAD, depression(of course!), and ADD. I have been suffering for so long, some days I get a glimpse of what a normal perception of the word would look like, only to wale up the next day completely lost and unmotivated. I am employed but almost everyday is a struggle fuelled by anxiety and physical and mental exhaustion .I just cant think of a job that keeps me interested. I have switched fields/careers three times already. I am sure that many of you have similar experiences, what do you do about it?

[Bravely_Me_in_Tx]

I'm new here too. I was only diagnosed over the summer and take adderall which has helped me a great deal. I still struggle with focus A LOT. I started Grad school in September, and couldn't have gotten this far without medicine and a daughter still at home that just finished her masters degree and is a mental health therapist. I was divorced in March of 2020 from an alcoholic (8 years) so being on my own in an apartment makes me feel at peace. I'm back to my happy, confident self. I have a part time job that I love (10 years) so being a people person helps me a lot too. My daughter helps me when I go off in a thousand different directions. She has ADD, so does my 35 year old son, and probably my 34 year old daughter too. My "children", my colleagues at work and school, and a 93 year old mom keep me grounded. I hope you find some peace.

[bagenae]

wow i literally feel like i wrote this myself...... i made a way too long post about this yesterday, if you'd like to relate to someone. i recently began taking metylphenidate (36 mg so far), and the motivation and feeling of being behind and lost, is mostly gone. to be fair, i've been in therapy for more than a year now, to also combat this, so i really recommend getting a support group where you can vent (this is what makes the difference for me, because then it doesn't bouce around in my head as much). before i could never image getting a "regular" job, the thought threw me into a panic state several times, but now i'm getting a bakers education, and the performance and procentage of time i'm actually present, has improved sooo so so so much, and now i see myself in the future with a normal job, and a "normal" work week (i was conviced this wasn't possible for me)

it may take a long time, but if you listen to yourself, talk to people in similar boats, and find the right tools, i knooooow you'll get there. it sounds like a lot, and it kinda is, but YOU CAN FREAKING DO IT <3

[IgnoranceWasNotBliss]

My depression and anxieties were almost completely resolved with the right medication and the right dose. If you’re medicated and still experiencing all these issues, I would consider a switch! Switching medication can be a stressful thought. The last thing we want to do it rock the boat. Maybe try during a vacation or take a little time off work? Worst case senecio is it doesn’t work well and you go back to what you’re on now. But I will say, with my medication, some of the depression, brain fog and motivation issues took a few months to fully resolve. Well, obviously motivation will never be “resolved” but I started to feel a little bit of it. Not everyday or all the time, but certainly a lot more than I’ve ever had in my life! Hahaha. I feel like the motivation was actually cognitive though. The medication didn’t GIVE me motivation. It gave me the ability to just start something instead of think about starting it for a long time and getting stressed because I didn’t know where to start and then got tired of it and didn’t start at all. It also helped with motivation by helping me realize that the medication makes it more possible for me to do things. Before medication I was acutely aware of my limits. Almost like a self fulfilling prophecy, I would think about doing something and immediately tell myself I couldn’t do it (which was true), so I wouldn’t. However, now that I’m medicated I’ve realized I’m capable of more so I have to stop predicting that I will fail because I might not now! Maybe I will.... maybe I won’t! I won’t know until I try now.

Hope this helps.

[JimDaydreamer]

thanks everyone for your replies and encouragement. It is great to finally find people who can relate. I have been on adderall Since 2019. 20mg XR , it did make a difference at first by giving me the oomph to get things done and mental clarity I also feel less ashamed of being loud and talkative. But it took a toll on my anxiety and mood swings (as it wears off) . I am Lamotrigine 1 mg for mood swings. I think I grew tolerance to adderall because everything is back.

[John_Doe_ADHD in reply to JimDaydreamer]

I'm also taking Adderall 20 mg XR. My doctor also has me take a 10mg IR in the afternoon. I find that it really helps to continue the focus until the end of the work day. Do you take a booster in the afternoon? If not, you may want to talk to your doctor about it.

[Hidden]

I’ve always known I was different too, I’m only in college, but I know I’m very curious, so I’m considering journalism. I wish you luck.

[Falcon9775]

I finally joined CHAAD when I started feeling way off balance. I was diagnosed back in 2018. I am 52 years old. I want to be a whole person instead of the labels that define me: Sober 4 years, late diagnosis of ADHD 98th percentile. Divorced on 11/2020, sold my house on 2/12/2020, moved into an apartment. I am off my zoloft for depression, which feel pretty good. My recovery friends do not understand ADHD and to try and get support from them is like talking to a wall. The AA's just don't get it. I am here because I need support more than ever. I was a scotch ambassador for the US but now that I am sober, I can't go back to the booze business. I am very lost right now, so whatever online meetings for ADHD that you can recommend would be super helpful and beyond appreciated.