Feeling alone. Feeling misunderstood. New member who just needed to vent family issues.

[Colorlove]

I’m having these feelings of feeling alone and misunderstood. Struggling finically. Pressured by my sister to finically get better. Learning that I have to pay for college classes out of pocket. Learned that I’ve been living with Attention Deficit Disorder this whole entire time I’m pretty sure there is something else, a learning disability that I might not be aware of. I can tell. I’ve been feeling anxious and overwhelmed this whole summer. And the only person who seems to understand me and support me and root for me is my therapist. If it weren’t for her I wouldn’t even be aware of what I’ve been living with, I wouldn’t have gone back to school.. learning that I’ve been living with ADD has been eye opening, a relief yet scary. I come from a low income community, and living in a house hold where my mother is a single parent, who works in a restaurant all her life, live to work, doing things all by herself, in debt always, always struggling finically. All she know is work and trusting that Jesus is going to do the work for her and her family. She doesn’t understand mental health, she doesn’t understand other cultures especially my own.So most of the time she’ll say hurtful things not to intentionally hurt but because she doesn’t understand. All she knows is work work work. I have a sister who is like 9 months younger than me. Our relationship? We’re close but yet so far apart. Growing up, I was always annoying her, it was as if she was the older sister annoyed of her little sister. I was impulsive as a kid. I mean very. And it bothered her. I bothered her. So she grew angry with me. I’m 23 and she’s 22. Till this day she is angry with me and I’m aware of other things that we both experienced growing up. Now she has a 4 year old daughter. I think she is even angrier with me more than before. During her pregnancy she was so angry with me. I do have a feelin she might have some Narcissistic characteristics. One day she’s stressed because she’s finically not doing okay and when she does close a deal (real estate y’all know how that goes) she’s happy. One day she’s sweet and expresses how motivated she feels and how good she feels then she’s stressed all over again. When I opened up to my family this whole time I’ve been living with ADD, my mom and sister became silent. The after math of that day and today: I mean my mother always knew there was something up with me. The day I was born, I swallowed my mother’s womb water and was hospitalized for a week. The doctors told her that there will be consequences like aggression and impairments. At 3 years old I began to speak. My mother told me this 3 years ago. I thought it was humorous at the time. But lately now that we are aware of my diagnosis I have not received any family support, feeling misunderstood, no compassion, nobody wants to try family therapy becuse I mean we are finically struggling so just imagine the blaming, the arguing, the “me me me”. I live in a dysfunctional house hold. And me being aware of it all I’m trying to seek the emotional support that I need through therapy but how about my family? How are we going to emotional support each other if all we do is express worry, fear, anger to each other? So I left. I love my family but I can’t handle my emotions alone plus theirs. I’m a highly sensitive woman. I went to my cousins for this whole summer, but I can’t over stay my stay.. thank healthunlocked and community. Peace and love

[Lovinit]

You seem like a very intelligent wonderful women with a good head on her shoulders. You will get though this in time. I wish I knew what to say about what you can do about the family except your family is going to think and do what they know how to do. Continue working on you stay focused on you. Your family is going to do what there going to do and if you accept them for who they are and have boundaries because I feel they have hurt you and have not given you what you need in life. Take care of yourself learn as much as you can about your adhd Brian stay connected with people who support you and continue getting help. You’re in charge of your life and I believe you’ll make the best of it