I am New here.. Well Qualified, but poor performance at work and Life.Connecting all Dots now

[UshaNemani]

Hi All, This week I realized that i have ADHD. I have all the Symptons related to attentiveness and HyperActivity. Im ery well Qualified, Software Engineer, but not performing well at work due to below reasons.

lack of focus,time management, recklesness, not focussing on minute details, impulsivity, very very low confidence...Though I Graduated from IIT, I have a very low confidence. Friends of mine are doing god at their workplace .But Iam working for a small company. I cannot concentrate for more than 10minutes, cant remember what I learnt before a few days (when I jump into other tasks) .Facing too much difficulty in work-life balance.

After full day work at office, Iam very lazy to prepare food and many times skip it. Ofourse we are earning to eat healthy, but Iam over worried about my work life..

Dialy I study or practice coding for hours,but I forget everything when I switch to other home related tasks. Which I end up in Copying the code, or mugging it up ,and utterly fail in interviews.

My analysis Skills are Zero, as I dont concentrate on minute details of the technologies. Which are resulting in poor performance at interviews and work.

I left my job due to hypertension and too much stress, changed employers often

having very few personal or work-related achievements.

Now I am connecting all those dots and ended up here..

I sleep a lot even in working hours, and odd times, I get sleep when my surroundings are calm,irrespective of time ...I am Not finding reason till now.

Please help me in getting back on right track.

[Rickytshirt]

It sounds like you're having a very tough time. Take time to look after yourself at every opportunity. Take lots of notes at work. Break tasks at work down into smaller parts, list them and check them off as you do them. See about getting diagnosed. Maybe try food supplements in the meantime. I started taking L-Theanine recently and it has helped me focus better at work. There are some tutorials for job interviews online. This one from someone who actually worked in coding: youtube.com/watch?v=_yI_WCl...(Not working as expected?)

[UshaNemani in reply to Rickytshirt]

Ricky , Thanks a lot for replying. This video is really helpful.. Those all mentioned in video exactly suits me. Please keep posting more informative material here.

I will follow your instructions mentioned above.

[UshaNemani in reply to UshaNemani]

I really need this kind of support that we are offering job to the company..and not begging their job..I failed to find this difference and now my company pays me like a beggar. irrespective of my degree .. My HR easily understood that I am dieing for that job and she played with my CTC.

Ofcourse Im not confident enough due to no solid skillset. so they took advantage of my low confidence.

[dgs2018]

I would have to take exception to one of your statements in this posting. You said:

"having very few personal or work-related achievements."

I'm sure that is not true. It's just much harder to find those achievements when as an ADHD person, you have heard so much of this all your life: Are you really trying? Seriously? Why don't you just ... like the rest of us do ? What's your problem ? What the general public fails to understand is that we don't process information like regular minds do. Our minds are wired differently, so we solve problems differently. I'm sure you're not giving yourself enough credit for things you are doing right and have done right. Hope you find this helpful and carry on because you have the skills that it takes.

[UshaNemani in reply to dgs2018]

Exactly True dgs2018.. We are processing info differently.But my opponent is already ready with next step,so My solution carries no weightage (i cannot support my answer with data etc.)

If others are upto date with latest technologies. Im struggling to learn or understand older techs. For example. I started with Java in way 2011, till now I cannot answer indepth questions. People around me are running with new techs like AWS, Machine learning. If I goto interview, they blast me with java deep questions, that i lost 20+ interviews .whatever i dint answer i immediatly came home and worked on it. But i forgot after few months.

Software interviews are like they ask questions from different domains- Algorthms, datastructuresa are core.then Latest technology related- Java,Python, AWS,microservcies.

Its like If i learn Java for 3months, I forget Algos. Then if I switch to Algos, I forget Java.

I have written every program atleast 10+times in notebooks..Have all notes since last 10yrs..But Again I start same topic afresh in new notes.

It became cyclic now.

Im too tensed in interview that, if that question is not expected, I become tensed and cannot answer it. Sometimes i dont remember optimised approach and give them boilerplate code(after 6 yrs in software).

I always loose in first round all normal Companys itself...

[UshaNemani in reply to dgs2018]

My friends always see me with books and feel that Im too studious..but dats not the fact. If my mind doesnt retain what I studied, obviously i should hold books in hand forever.

I dont understand theory.. should always watch videos to understand small concept as well.

[Nick1913 in reply to UshaNemani]

Hi Usha,

Welcome ,

I don’t know much about your job, but I have a good understanding about always studying and having to study twice as long twice as hard, while others finished and went out and had fun. It took me a while to realize they are not me, I am not them, I want this certificate and in order to get it I need to stay up until 2AM, until I know this material.... but then I got lucky sometimes and hyper focused on it and knew it like my name. Forward backwards, sideways.... I knew inside of myself I could do it, and I got it done. I wanted it, I wanted to know it, I wasn’t going to let anything or anyone get in my way of achieving my goal....

I have had some work issues as of late, I got redetermined and am going for it lock stock and barrel....

Hope you find something in my words to help you.

[leighan]

Try getting a life coach who specializes in ADHD. Just google it.