44 year old adult here going back to college and working as well. I’m having a really horrible time being able to absorb the lectures and my memory is really bad. It takes me an incredible amount of time to learn a concept while the others have already grasped the idea and moved on. Quite embarrassing for me. If I can’t learn, I might as well quit and give up the hope of furthering my education. I’m frustrated and have so much anxiety and depression over this.😞 i feel like Im the dumbest person ever. What can i do to help my situation? Surely the answer is not to quit. I hate that! I dont want to quit but to be persistent an preserve.
Does anyone have any suggestions or has been through this and what did you do?
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kami73
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I was in my mid-30's at the time, but otherwise I know the feeling. Some manner of anti-anxiety therapy or meds may help, since there tend to be mental blocks (this went to hell before, so it's going to go to hell again). I don't know what kind of lectures you're dealing with, but you can look into getting the lecturer to email you slides after the fact to help you with reviewing (and you MUST review everything immediately, on your own, that night or the next). Also, audio record things, and mark the time codes of important points in your notes, so that even if you can't process it at the time, you can go back to, say, the 7-minute mark and review what was said right then.
Use a voice recorder - Olympus Digital Voice Recorder WS-853 for about $60 is a good one. You can record a class and play it back. You can play it back and jot comments into another recorder. then listen to your comments. It takes a long time but it's better than just worrying about not having gotten it. Review, review. You don't sound a bit dumb!!! Good luck! You deserve it.
I have the exact same recorder, so helpful. In class I would jot down notes but my handwriting sucks so I would use the recorder and my notes to create new notes typed into a word processing program. I like using Word Perfect as it is pretty easy to add photos, graphs, and equations into my notes to visualize things.
Went back at 55. Struggled. I used the services of the school’s wellness department. I even had use of a psychiatrist who had just started and she’s the one who diagnosed me with ADD. My school also had a accessibility department and I used the services there - a learning strategist helped me a lot. All in all it was “the best of times and the worst of times”. I was continuously exhausted but I did it. So will you!!
Hi, Kami, keep your chin up! I know it's a struggle sometimes. I'm in my late 30s doing it, but I do it online... which is more expensive per credit, but I feel like it's worth it because I'm not really on anyone else's schedule until deadlines come around each week. I still have issues with time management and I still stress during homework and exams, but it's easier for me than in person classes. There are so fewer ways for me to get distracted. They proctor either in person at a testing center with a certified proctor or via an online proctoring software with people who watch your screen, your surroundings and sometimes interrupt you if there is a noise or a movement that looks/sounds like deceptive behavior (they watch you through your webcam to ensure you're not cheating). As awkward as that sounds, the person doesn't make any noise and I forget they're there at all unless I talk to myself to sound something out and then I hear them ask me to show them my study area. Even that said, it's still easier for me than being in a lecture hall or a room with noises and people and all the other distractions. Long story longer, you'll be fine. Sometimes when I get down on myself, I'm reminded of how grateful I am to be doing this at my age and with my fogginess, and I'm doing pretty well... but I really have to work for it, which is the most frustrating part. I'm just taking it one day at a time.
Have you tried talking to your teacher or visiting the students with disabilities office or whatever the equivalent may be? If you provide an official diagnosis ten by law they are required to work with you to help you succeed. Even if you don’t have the official diagnosis your instructor may be willing to help you if you reach out to him/her. However, this last part may be more difficult if you are st a larger school.
I am in college myself (I am about to finish my freshman year as a traditional student at a small community college) and I have learned that teachers may be more willing to help than they seem, but you have to be the one to reach out and ask for it.
A couple examples of things they can do is provide paper assignment sheets, and allow extra time for you to complete homework or tests.
I’m 34 and I’ve honestly been in school since I was a child. I can’t seem to imagine my life without it, to be honest. I’m about to have my 3rd child and I’m working on my 4th degree and I’ve had to formulate my own learning strategy as a result of the way I learn.
First off, grade school was a shit of a place for me. I could never learn anything in class so I’m order for me to be promoted to the next grade, I had to learn to learn on my own. It’s become apparent to me that this skill has actually benefited me the most.
Just to frame my situation, I spent 4 years in middle school and 5 in high school. During those years I was one of those kids you’d say was “hanging with the wrong crowd”
So my point is this- visual learners need different techniques for retaining information than non-visual learners. Individuals with ADHD are generally visual learners. I think visual learning is a strength, to be honest. A good example would be the mathematicians and physical scientists I work with at my day job. Sure they are like sponges sometimes and they seemingly remember concepts an equations on the first try and retain them for the long term without much effort. I take longer to remember those same concepts but once I do, I am able to formulate a mental picture that gives me the advantage of creativity- because my intuition allows me to find interesting uses for concepts and algorithms that often those with just a good memory miss.
I bring this up because it’s intriguing to think that there are other perceptions to be had relevant to our style of learning. My visual learning abilities have always separated me from non-visual learners. when you look at it as a strength, you are better able to seek out techniques and methods that work well for your brain without getting caught up in a cycle of negativity and anxiety.
One really good technique I’ve only recently learned of is called “mind mapping”. Do a YouTube search for it when you get a chance. I’m curious to know your thoughts. The idea is to get more senses involved in the processing of important concepts so that the body has a stronger potential associated with them and thus even complex concepts can become intuition more quickly.
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