Study habits

[Pjmcwhymer]

My son is 21 and has inattentive and other type of adhd. He was put on vyvance a month ago. He is struggling in college. Any recommendations on HOW to study?? He cruised through is. With honors.

[kmcwilliams1]

Hello, I have ADHD combined type. I also cruised through high school with very little effort and graduated with a scholarship. College was a whole new ball game for me. I wasn't diagnosed until I was 21 when I finally realized how much I was struggling and failing in school.

Is your son getting an kind of behavior modification therapy? Unfortunately the meds are not a magic fix, they cannot make us study, they are there to help us keep the motivation once we get going with whatever task we are on. It still takes some effort to be productive.

Having a routine, schedule, and rules for himself would greatly help. He needs to find something to reward himself with for studying. He needs to set expectations for himself down on paper and hang it up where he can see it every day.

Another thing to look into is the schools disability services. The school that I went to allowed me to get notes from the teachers and bring a tape recorder to class so that I would be able to focus more on the lecture than taking the notes. They also allowed me to take my exams in a separate room a way from the other students and distractions. I was allowed extra time on my exams. It's best if he is upfront with his professors so that he gets comfortable with them and will be able to ask them for help in the future if necessary.

Is he noticing any improvement or change with the meds? He might need an adjustment. The first thing you try doesn't always work. I hope this helped in any way!! With your support and encouragement he can do this. College is challenging for anyone, but even more so for someone with ADHD or ADD, especially when they haven't learned how to cope with it yet. It's been 7 years since I was diagnosed and I still struggle daily with tasking.

[yourock in reply to kmcwilliams1]

Thank you for your valuable sharing of personal experience. My son, age 30, was diagnosed with ADHD and dyspraxia in second grade, but didn't have the school support available. He tried college, twice, with bad grades he withdrew. Two years ago he was re diagnosed and prescribed vyvannse, which he says has helped. He wants to finish his geology undergrad degree, but finances, the struggles of ADHD and dyspraxia, and a low wage, no benefits job make it a challenge. Any suggestions on how or where he can get support for the daily tasking struggle and how to complete the geology degree goal?

Again, my sincere thanks to you for your determination and personal story!

I didn't do enough to help him, because I didn't know what do to, when he was in K - 12. We were told he" will be fine because he is so smart". He is very bright, but the daily struggles are tough. He would have benefited from learning about ADHD and dyspraxia and from resources to teach him how to learn, organize, prioritize, as well as time and task management.

Thank you!

[kmcwilliams1 in reply to yourock]

Hello, I also have not finished my degree, and I’ve switched a couple times. I currently have about 6.5 years of college under my belt and I’m still 3 semesters away from finishing my accounting degree. I’ve taken some time off school, got married, had 3 kids, and recently moved to a new state, and now I feel I am almost ready to get back to it. First though I must fine tune my organization and daily tasking. I recently started writing everything down I need to do, want to do, would like to have, just any little thing I might forget, which would end up causing me frustration. I myself have not fully conquered daily tasking, especially with 3 kids! Recently I made myself 2 tasking calendars. One is a weekly schedule that has a few items that are done every week on that day, also it has a daily task section for the tasks I need to do daily. My second calendar is for monthly tasks, for the things that do not really need done every week, but at least once a month. I found the calendars online, printed them and filled them with all my tasks. I then put them in picture frames that I keep in my kitchen with a dry erase marker, this way I have to look at my tasks several times a day and I am able to mark them off as I complete them and then just erase at the end of the week. If I’m feeling ambitious I will plan out all my meals for the week and put them on the calendar. I know that if I am not organized in my home I will not do well in school, for the simple fact that everything that I want to do at home will cloud my brain and take my attention away from solely focusing on school when I need too.

When I lived in West Virginia, they had a division of mental rehabilition that helped me financially with books and tuition. The help was a couple thousand for the semester. Also, since I had a scholarship, I did not start using the pell grant until my 4th year, leaving me with plenty of available government assistance. I would suggest looking into seeing if there are any grants out there for adults with mental disabilities. If he hasn’t used up all the available pell grant, he has that available. Cam he and is he willing to take loans through the school? A lot of time there is money out there, you just have to find it. I recently moved to South Carolina, so I’m waiting to get residency to go back to school. This will give me the time I need to get organized and on a routine in my home and also do the research I need to do in order to find the resources that might be available to me. You could try calling disability services at the school he wants to attend and see if they know of any financial services.

In order for me to succeed I always need someone to hold me accountable for the things I need to do. Sometimes we just forget and it’s nice to have someone that can help you stay on track. When your son and I would have been going through school, mental health wasn’t a big thing yet, there wasn’t must awareness, therefor making it harder for kids like your son and I who didn’t act out, who weren’t the bad kids. The information wasn’t there for the parents to know that we needed extra help in those areas. I don’t believe you didn’t do enough, I believe that you just weren’t informed. You’re doing something now and that’s what is important to your son!!!!

If I missed anything just ask again and I’ll be happy to answer!!!

Have a great day!

[yourock in reply to kmcwilliams1]

First, I want to thank you for your prompt and informative reply! Your life experience with college, three kids, marriage, as well as the great organization idea (calendars, picture frames) are huge accomplishments! You should feel really good about that! Moving, alone, is a huge task!

Thank you for the college financial ideas. My son mentioned he has about $20,000 in school loans. I am not sure if he exhausted his Pell grants, but it is worth exploring.

I can make general calls to the university student support services, but do not have access to his personal information, as it should be. He feels empowered doing the research, but gets overwhelmed and frustrated, sometimes confused, not knowing what questions to ask.

Having someone you trust hold you accountable is so important. My 30 year old son, even when little, would get irritated when I took on that role. So I tended to back off, in high school and beyond. Sometimes I don't know what to say, or how to say it, so that the accountability comes through, but not be "the mom" being nosy.

My sincere thanks to you about your experience growing up and resources available. I still feel sad I couldn't do more to help him get the support and "tips and tricks" he needed. I think his self esteem was affected too, but this isn't his fault, he didn't do anything wrong. We all learn differently. We are all individuals.

Thank you so very much! Your experiences and successes are to be celebrated! If I think of something else, I would love to get back to you. You are amazing!

[kmcwilliams1 in reply to yourock]

Thank you for all your kind encouraging words. I had a very rocky childhood that led to emotiontional and sometimes physical abuse because of my adhd, which no one knew I had. I was put down and overly punished for being forgetful, getting just 1 C, basically for everything. I was constantly grounded and constsntly asked what was wrong with me and what was i thinking. I have struggled a lot to get to where I am, I didn't have any guidance, only punishment for doing it the wrong way or not doing it at all. You may never know how much of an impact your words had on me. Your kindness and eagerness to understand has brought me to tears. I feel very blessed to have found this community. Please never hesitate to contact me with questions. I will do my best to answer them with the knowledge I have gained over the last 7 years. Thank.you again!! You're are also amazing!!

[yourock in reply to kmcwilliams1]

Your bravery in sharing your experience takes inner strength. I am sad to hear of your past, but understand, as people can't grasp how ADHD brains think and see the world. I too was frustrated parenting, not knowing what to say or do, because of lack of resources (or being told at teacher conferences, "He will grow out of it." and finding him just 'passed on' from teacher to teacher. What is amazing is your persistence to succeed, even though it came from negative experiences. And now, you are helping others, by sharing your story. Many thanks! You Rock!!

[cbt4adhd]

There are some good suggestions in some books geared towards or with sections on college students with ADHD:

Learning Outside the Lines by Jonathan Mooney and David Cole

Making the Grade with ADD by Stephanie Moulton Sarkis

Succeeding with Adult ADHD by Abigail Levrini and Fraces Prevatt

Adult ADHD Tool Kit by J. Russell Ramsay and Anthony Rostain

Getting connected with a learning specialist through the campus learning center or a therapist for regular meetings addressing these issues can be helpful, in addition to all the suggestions offered in the previous reply.

Hope this helps.

[RoxanneFouche]

It’s frustrating when bright students get to a level in school where their natural intelligence doesn’t compensate anymore for their ADHD/executive functioning challenges. I appreciate kmswilliams1’s experience and advice - especially about looking into assistance from the college’s disability center where students might be able to receive accommodations such as extended time on exams, testing in a reduced distraction environment, note taking assistance, alternative formats (e.g., e text, audiobooks) assistive technologies, and other appropriate accommodations. Additionally, colleges often have learning centers, where students might get general help, or assistance from particular departments (writing center, math lab, etc.). Students might also take advantage of their professors’ office hours to get their questions answered and receive needed assistance. To help with executive functioning skills (planning, organization, prioritization, time management, starting – and completing – tasks), students might team up with friends/classmates or study groups to help them with accountability or seek the assistance of an ADHD coach who can help them develop the individualized skills, strategies and habits that set them up for success in college.

[kmcwilliams1 in reply to RoxanneFouche]

It’s very frustrating!!! I agree with all the suggestions you made, but that never worked for me because I never went. I hated being in groups because I didn’t want the group to depend on me for anything because I didn’t know if I would do the assignment or not. It doesn’t help being held accountable by people I don’t know, for me personally. I always talked myself out of going to the professor or going to the tutoring/help centers offered at my university. Making and taking the time to do those things are very very hard. Easier said than done situation. It’s just hard to ask for help. Obviously no one is the same, but for me personally, back then I couldn’t do it. I do feel that I might be able to do it now, but that’s after years of processing, accepting and understanding exactly what is going on in my head.

Thank you for your added information and advice that might help many people.