Hi there! I'm new here but I thought I would come here as we are really struggling! Our 5 year old daughter was diagnosed a couple weeks ago with ADHD (also has many symptoms of ODD and anxiety as well). She has been suspended from school multiple times in the past couple of weeks due to her behavior- defiant, screaming, kicking walls, hitting, throwing things (keeps getting pulled from class). In addition, she is supposed to be attending before and after school child care at the school but she starts getting worked up and "refusing" prior, to the point it's a complete meltdown and she's so escalated no one can get her to attend. Her pediatrician started her on Concerta to help with ADHD in class, and even increased the dose to hope to curb her behaviors of impulsivity and emotional lability but nothing seems to be working. We are at a complete loss, and I'm starting to lose hope. Every night we have good discussions with her and she is empathetic and says we are going to have a great day and she will go to school and work hard, and then the next day comes and we are stuck in the same loop. Any suggestions?
5yo Newly Diagnosed ADHD: Hi there! I'm... - CHADD's ADHD Pare...
5yo Newly Diagnosed ADHD
Good day, cougnurse,
Thank you for contacting CHADD National Resource Center on ADHD. I understand how challenging this can be, and please know that you’re doing the best you can. One suggestion I have is to consider play therapy, family therapy, and learning more about her diagnosis. Children with ADHD often experience intense emotions, so it might also be helpful to explore behavior therapy.
Here is a list of resources that can be helpful.
chadd.org/for-parents/behav...
chadd.org/adhd-news/adhd-ne...
chadd.org/attention-article...
If there is anything else you need, please let me know.
Liseth
Health Information Specialist
CHADD's National Resource Center on ADHD
Please try Neuro Chiro treatment. It is very effective.
My 5 year old started ADHD meds as he was having similar issues. It took some tweaking. He is now 6.5 and on Concerta and Guanfacine. He was on Risperdol last year which immediately helped though being on it long term it somewhat controversial but we needed immediate relief as he was getting kicked out of school.
this sounds like I could have written this a year and a half ago. My son who is now 7 in first grade had an awful first half of kindergarten. Suspended 3 times which I have never heard of for a 5/6 year old. After all the school issues we had him evaluated by a child psychiatrist. He was diagnosed with adhd and also had previously been diagnosed odd by a psychologist. He also shows many anxiety signs but not formally diagnosed. Fast forward to the 2nd half of first grade, he is doing amazing at home and school. What worked for us first and foremost is a medicine combo that works well for him. We tried several things that didn’t work but are now at a steady state. Each child is different so what works for one may not for another. My son takes 20mg extended release focalin generic and 1 mg 2 times a day of short acting guanfacine. We also did pcit (parent child interaction therapy), social skills groups and exposure therapy (he developed a lot of anxiety around sudden loud noises). We were also lucky that despite a crappy start with the school that his school offers a self contained emotional regulation impairment class that he was moved into. He also switched homeroom teachers half way through kindergarten. At first he was in the self contained 80% of the day, now he is only in there 15-20% of the day. I felt at an extreme loss at this time and could not see the light. I promise you it will get better with the right interventions. Hang in there.
our buddy received a formal dx when he was five about a year ago. Here’s what I think are mission critical items:
- child psychiatrist. There are more meds and different combos of meds that peds aren’t trained in depth to help you tinker with. A child psychiatrist can monitor and help you with meds in a way your ped just can’t. You’ll probably see people around here mention that the right med/combo of meds will deal with 70-80% of the behaviors. I can say that has been our experience - the right med changes everything. I will also add that the wrong med can make things worse and more stressful which is why if something is not working, super important to have a professional who can switch them quickly.
- consider additional supports outside of school. We did almost 2 years of OT and that was awesome. I don’t know if it works for everyone but to have a place/person for him to go where he works on skills without the pressure of class/teachers where it feels like playing - I think it can help with self esteem and practicing new/hard skills in a supportive environment. We used our insurance and didn’t go through school for this.
- with a diagnosis you can now start pushing for better supports in school with 504/IEP. When you start using that lens/language you can push on the school - removal from classroom as punishment/consequence due to behaviors stemming from a diagnosis = access to education denied due to a disability. This is illegal, and special ed is designed to prevent it. Given that your school sounds punitive I would look into getting a special education advocate to help you navigate your request and the inevitable stonewalling/pushback.
When you have the right supports in place all of this is so much better. I remember being in that place of crisis and it’s so hard- even properly medicated and with effective supports there is still some stress all the time (adhd is hard to live with!!) but it can get so so so much better than that time of crisis. I am thinking of you and wishing you good luck and a light at the end of the tunnel soon.
Agree with the above. My daughter was also diagnosed at 5 (with significant emotional dysregulation and perfectionism issues). She went to a Catholic school for KG- had a teacher that was interested in her and was willing to work with her. She started with OT for over a year at this time as well because her fine motor skills were weak coupled with the perfectionism made writing impossible. She fell apart in 1st grade when moved to a class of 31.
We moved her to a small Montessori school and initiated guanfacine ER which helped some with the emotional dysregulation and a little better with attention, but she still needed the addition of a stimulant to maintain her focus. My husband and I also attended a parenting class for ADHD kids, and I will say a couple of the changes they asked us to make really resonated with our daughter. She has graduated out of OT, she is on focalin 10/guanfacine ER 2, and with the small class size (17 in her lower elementary with 2-3 instructors) and a less dictatorial approach to learning, she has blossomed. With the medication and environment she is in, she is thriving in 2nd grade. We are still working on the more difficult times (getting ready for school in the AM and going to bed, as she is as time blind as they come). We are also working on using Dr. Ross Green’s Method B approach to overcoming the blow-ups her low frustration tolerance brings out, especially when she is tired/hungry/low on stimulant.
The other change we made was restricting screens to only weekends/non-school times, and no more than 2 hours per day. This is usually spent watching a movie as a family.
Things are by no means perfect, but we are in a much better place. I have been where you are - it can, and will get better when the whole family/physician/school community are on the same team.
Like many stated medication can help. I was very against medication at first because my son was only 5 yrs old. However after he stated "Mommy my life is out of control", I knew I had to do something because i was getting calls and emails from the school daily, no party invites and being home was stressful. We started with Focalin then Adderall for the ADHD. He also has ODD so we started Guanfacine which seems to help. Maintaining a routine and sleep are very important. I started him on Melatonin and Lavender spray because the meds are stimulants and he couldn't sleep. I also give him Omega with D from Nordic Naturals, Renzo Vit B & D3. I got a developmental pediatrician to really assess if there were other issues and a CBT therapist for the ODD. He has an IEP and receives in-school counseling weekly. I know its a lot and many of these things I was against initially because I didn't want him labeled and thought I could do it homeopathically. I also suggest a full bloodwork panel because she may be deficient in a vitamin or mineral that could be contributing to these issues. All these things have helped my son. Is everything perfect? Of course not. However, its way better than before and the journey is continuous. As they grow and go from grade to grade there will be new challenges but it helps to have a team. Good Luck!
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