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Granddaughter - ADHD

Energybites profile image
6 Replies

Granddaughter is 6 years old - suspended from school numerous times in Herkimer County, VA. Class size is 19 children. Child has a therapist and psychiatrist but is not medicated yet. Parents are divorced with mother residing in Va and father stationed at Fort Bragg, NC. Child lives in small apartment with her mother and sister who is 5. The children fight constantly. The younger child will not leave the older (ADHD) child alone. It has gotten so bad that the older child was found hiding behind the toilet. My son, owns a large home in Fayetteville and both girls have their own room. Because the older child continues to get suspended (1st grader) she may go and live with her father. My question is are there any schools in Fayetteville that specialize in special needs children? Is there a CHADD chapter in Fayetteville NC? Can anyone recommend a special needs tutor in Fayetteville area? Looking for help, advice, and resources.

Thank you in advance for any suggestions, recommendations.

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Energybites
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6 Replies
Aspen797 profile image
Aspen797

I’m sorry to hear about the struggles your granddaughter is having. Hopefully someone here will have information specific to your region. Generally, it can be helpful to have a comprehensive evaluation by a developmental behavioral pediatrician or neuropsychologist. You can read more about developmental behavioral pediatricians and find one near you here: healthychildren.org/English.... Developmental behavioral pediatricians are usually based at larger university hospitals and are often covered by insurance. They can assess a child’s needs across multiple areas and refer you to a variety of providers that can help. Oftentimes our kids have other needs that have to be addressed like social thinking/skill (speech), emotional regulation (OT), behavior, executive functioning, and learning differences, in addition to attention difficulties.

Ordinary pediatricians and psychiatrists are often not equipped to evaluate broadly and in depth across these many areas. A neuropsychologist (often private pay and limited to assessment) or developmental behavioral pediatrician can.

If you haven’t already, reach out to your state’s parent resource center. There is one federally funded resource center in every state who provide parents of children with unique needs information and referral. Find yours here: parentcenterhub.org/find-yo...

Lastly, if a six year old child is being suspended repeatedly, they are not receiving the supports they need to succeed. The parent resource center above can provide more information, but in a nutshell the school should evaluate the child for special education services, conduct a functional behavioral assessment and provide a combination of skill teaching (through speech, OT, special ed, etc) and accommodations to prevent the need for removal. If removal continues, you may need an advocate to ensure a better IEP. More detailed information is available at A Day in our Shoes, Wrightslaw, and Understood.org.

Welcome to this wonderful supportive online community.

Klmamma profile image
Klmamma

She doesn't need a special school, she needs meds.

Onthemove1971 profile image
Onthemove1971

Welcome! Thanks for joining us. Most children with ADHD benefit from: medication to help decrease negative behavior, school plan to help with learning and thearpy to help the child deal with the symptoms of ADHD. I love the suggestions of the other members.

If you guy change the school, then she will be attending with children who also have needs. It would really help her to set up the tools she needs before moving her to a new school. She needs support from the school.

Hope this helps.

Pema20 profile image
Pema20

your family is facing a difficult situation. I feel for your granddaughter. No school should suspend and elementary aged child, ever, and none of us here can advise you on the right next steps. My view though is that school clearly is not looking out for her. Another poster recommended a full neuropsychological evaluation, this is a good idea. Parent training for mom and dad could also help a lot. Check out ADHDdude’s website as he is low cost, virtual and practical. Impact parents also has resources. My guess is your daughter and son in law do not have a lot of money. Many parent coaches will negotiate and groups can be less expensive and very beneficial. Only a professional can determine if medication is a good next step, but many find it helpful. Have your SIL talk to the school department and find out what they have for special needs kids before deciding on what to do next. Sending you and your family support. Hang in there.

LisethHIS profile image
LisethHIS

Hello, Energybites,

Thank you for contacting CHADD National Center on ADHD. When it comes to Fayetteville NC, we don't, but we have this chapter in NC chadd.net/chapter/176. We also offer parent training called parent to parent. chadd.org/parent-to-parent/ perhaps is something both parents can look into to understand ADHD and how to work with a child who has ADHD. Here is our professional directory in NC. chadd.org/professional-dire... e=1 you can find a coach and tutor. When it comes to school, if public you can request school accommodations, here is a link to Wrights Law wrightslaw.com/ Hopefully these resources are helpful.

If you have further questions, please let us know. We are here to help!

Liseth

Health Information Specialist

CHADD’s National Resource Center on ADHD

chadd.org

Energybites profile image
Energybites

Thanks to all that responded. I received news from my son that both my granddaughters were evaluated last week by a psychiatrist. Doc stated that the oldest child (the one in my original post) is definite for ADHD and most likely on the autism spectrum. Doc then stated the younger child may also be on the autism spectrum. I don’t know what my son and x-daughter-in-law intend to do at this point. One of the posts mentions meds. I tend to agree with this for the older granddaughter. I believe she is or will be at risk. She wanders away, will talk to any stranger regardless of gender or age, and doesn’t appear to fear anything such as deep water, etc. We watch her like a hawk. I’m very concerned about the frequent suspensions for a six year old. Based on your posts, none of you seem to think that’s acceptable for a six year old. I recently retired and have a good relationship with my x-daughter-in-law so I offered to help with the girls when needed. I took a course on ADHD and ordered several (recommended) books on ADHD and ASD through CHADD. Hopefully I can help my granddaughters and their parents and will take the parenting courses recommended in the posts. I have another question regarding service dogs. It’s recommended that the better age to get a service dog for ADHD/ASD is 8. If the doctor thinks a service dog is a good idea, especially for the 6 year old, I will get her one. Her tendency to wander has me quite alarmed. A service dog may insure added safety. Does anyone out there have any experience with these dogs?

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