Some success and hope with friends - CHADD's ADHD Pare...

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Some success and hope with friends

Shamasamdrew profile image
10 Replies

Just wanted to put this in a place where parents would understand and to offer some example of hope. My son is 16 and for years, he has struggled making and keeping friends. Kids bullied him, shunned him and he had the hardest time fitting in due mostly to the symptoms of ADHD. To add to the fun, the pandemic certainly took it’s toll on him making friends as well.

Today though, he has spent the day with his friend group. He HAS a friend group! They have been playing board games at my kitchen table for the last 6 hours. They are kind and respectful and they accept my son!

I put this here because this is the kind of post I needed to see years ago when things didn’t look like they do at this moment. When I literally watched neighborhood kids run and hide in their homes rather than include him when he came outside. I needed this post when I asked the teacher does he have any friends?The answer was almost never what I wanted to hear.

Today, I am just really reflecting on the journey that got us here. I needed to write it out and if it offers anyone a glimmer of hope which I know I needed so much when he was younger then I am glad I wrote it out here. Thanks for reading of you have gotten this far.

10 Replies
Onthemove1971 profile image

Thank you! You are right we all need to hear after years of struggles it can get better. Age is a wonderful thing for our kids.

I am so happy for you and your son.


Auggie123 profile image

Thanks so much for posting this. So happy for you and your son. It took a lot of work to get to that moment... thank you for sharing that the hard work pays off...reminds me not to give up and to keep hope in sight.

Phaselis profile image

Yes, you are exactly true. We need to hear positive things as well, little success stories will make us hopefull. I have 11 years old son. He had suffered from all kind of bullying. The painful one was teachers bullying. Inspite of all bullying efforts, my son had himself accepted in almost whole school. His exellent art abilities helped him to be a cool guy. He is saying that he is one of the popular kids in school. In neighbourhood, everyday his friends come to home and invite him to play outside. He did this himself, no medication support(he is not using medication), no therapy support, no teacher support in classroom. I saw that as much as he gets older, he is doing better, he is creating strategies to deal with. I just want to share our story

WizKidMama profile image

Thanks so much for sharing. Success stories are absolutely vital to helping us get through the hardest times. Your story sounds very similar to my son, who tried so hard to make friends and was just too "different" for most to accept him. But when he hit 10th grade, he joined the marching band and finally came into his own. He found a place where he felt like he belonged and made friends that have stayed with through his first year of college now. My daughter is 9 and just recently diagnosed and she's having the same kind of hard time. I often think of my son & how he turned things around for himself and pray that my daughter can do the same. Seeing similar success stories from others helps so much. Very happy for you and your son :)

BStron profile image

Thank you for sharing this post. This gives us hope. We need to hear more positive stories ! Very happy for you and your son.

BlueCherries profile image

This made my day. Thank you very much. My child had been diagnosed with ADHD and depression at 9th grade and told us he didn't have friends from 5th grade but he has met friends in 7th grade and then Covid hit. He now has friends in high school but we don't see them at home since they don't live within our neighborhood. I am really hoping to meet them and their parents. Thanks again for sharing.

NNicole profile image

Thank you for sharing. My son has just been recently diagnosed and this is one of things I am most afraid of as we begin to navigate this diagnosis. I'm so happy your son has found his way. It must be a beautiful sound to hear their little voices and laughter fill your home. You have done a wonderful job!

KristinaMN71 profile image

Thank you for sharing this story. My daughter is in 9th grade and struggles socially—she operates as a 12-year-old, and it’s painful to watch kids actively avoid her when we are at school activities. I do hold out hope that she will adjust in the next year or two and find her way. She’s getting into theater, which I think has the sort of automatic community marching band can provide! So glad your son has discovered it.

anirush profile image

Sometimes it takes a while to find their way socially. My 17 year old grandson finally has friends. He has always had maybe one person he would talk to at school and would eat lunch by himself. He would say he was fine but I would worry. He finally found a friend who had other friends which helped.

I was a shy child and it does not help to try to push them.

Nanchli profile image

This is Awesome! I feel like teen agers years are the hardest for any kids but with special need kids they are the worse! Best is yet to come, ENJOY!

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