Starting ADHD treatment at age 17 ?

[Outdoor-Girl]

We didn't have a neuropsych eval done with our Guatemalan adopted son until the end of his freshman year in high school due to increasing struggles with school work. Diagnosis ADHD. We opted to work with a private tutor and executive functioning coach during sophomore year and we all got through it but it was very challenging. We got a 504 plan in place for junior year but everything started to unravel when our son got suspended from school for smoking pot then COVID hit. Come to find out he had been self medicating for a while and has continued to use both marijuana and alcohol despite extensive counseling, home consequences, legal issues. We finally got him to try an ADHD med this summer - his pediatrician prescribed Vyvanse (less chance to abuse) - but that made him even more irritable! He is refusing to try to take anything again. He is starting acupuncture tomorrow and has an appointment with a adolescent psychiatrist in 2 weeks. Every day is a real challenge from getting out of bed, to doing chores, to cleaning up after himself everywhere in the house, to his attitude and language, to trying to get him to exercise, to manage individual, family & legal counseling. School - in hybrid form- starts next week and I have left work on a FMLA and am thoroughly exhausted already! Any ideas on how to get a 17 year old to take medication? Any ideas on how to get through these years safely and successfully?

[seller]

Our ADHD son (adopted at 3 months) is now 26 and still struggles with the effects of ADHD. I can tell you that medication is really the only thing that is at all helpful. We did not have the pot issue, but we did have constant friction and lots of stress. My son did manage to graduate from high school - which is a MUST - because there are no jobs for someone without a HS diploma. He is now plodding through community college, takes Vyvanse 70mg daily, and we see maturity. But be prepared for a long road because many of these ADHD boys can be very defiant and hard to parent. For myself, I would not allow pot in the house (or alcohol). He should NOT drive anywhere - he is too immature and if he were to be caught with illegal substances, the consequences are forever. I advise minimal conversation and a few hard and fast rules: no illegal substances, medication daily - watch him take it or no electronics, including his phone. NO deep conversations - they don't listen and are too immature to actually implement change. Teens this age are trying to separate from their parents anyway, and ADHD just makes it worse. Room cleaning, exercise, chores, should all be tied to what he likes the most (except pot, of course!) I will be happy to chat privately if you would like! Just send me a chat message.

[Onthemove1971 in reply to seller]

Your post is so motivating for the many parents if medication is the answer.

Thank you!

[Outdoor-Girl in reply to seller]

Thank you for sharing your experiences and advice! I feel discouraged and encouraged at the same time. We have set the same standards of education and no substances. We do tie behavior to access to his phone. We did allow him to take drivers ed in to the fall of his junior year so he didn't feel too out of the norm and felt he will need LOTS more practice and supervision than the average youth. We have not allowed him to get his license for safety reasons. And it's a privilege that you earn by safe, responsible and legal behavior. You're right about no deep or lengthy conversations. Many times his response is "I don't care" . How do you keep up your stamina day to day?

[Onthemove1971]

This is a hard situation for everyone involved.

I hope that the psychiatrist can work with him and help him learn how beneficial medication can be.

Not sure where you guys are at with thearpy, but to me this goes hand in hand with medication.

We are happy our son was young when we tried a trillion ( felt like it) different medications so he doesn't know any different.

If the psychiatrist doesn't work what about convening him to just do a trial and see if a non stimulant would help like intivi? Then reward him with something he would love.

Bug hugs for your struggles, we are always here for you.

[Outdoor-Girl in reply to Onthemove1971]

Thank you for all your support! It's so good to connect with people who have similar experiences and feel understood!

Yes, he sees an individual counselor and we have a family counselor as well now.

The problem with trying to find a meaningful reward is that he doesn't love a whole lot right now and there's not a lot of access due to COVID.

Of course, we should have done the medication route a long time ago but I have to be careful not to beat myself up for this and so the "would have, could have, should have" thing. It just makes me sad.

So, we carry on day-by-day, sometimes hour-by-hour with hope. . . and a lot of appointments!

[Cjkchamp]

You're in a bad spot. As kids get older it is more and more difficult to get them to do things we know will help, but they don't want to do. I would recommend your family look into broad spectrum micronutrients. There are two companies, True Hope and Hardy Nutritionals. They were recommended by our son's psychiatrist, and they have worked well with his self-regulation, anxiety, depression, and eventually has taken the edge off his impulsivity/inattention/hyperactivity.

[Outdoor-Girl in reply to Cjkchamp]

Thank you so much for the suggestions about the broad spectrum micronutrients! So interesting and really so much more in line with my tendencies to do things naturally. Don't get me wrong- I know that there prescription medications are needed sometimes but if there are other options that minimize harm and side effects, I'm interested in learning more. Cheers!

[willandgrace]

My 16 year old son is very sensitive to meds and doesn’t like taking them. He was irritable on Vyvanse too. We tried Dyanavel and had better results. He likes it much better. It’s in liquid form. I know this is not a great idea but can you sneak it in his breakfast without him knowing. At least maybe you can see if it works before you tell him you’ve given it to him. Meds are an absolute must for my son during school. He just can’t focus without medication. Good luck to you. I’m hopeful that Dyanavel may work better for him. My son said it was smoother - no crash and it didn’t affect his mood or appetite as much.

[MaudQ]

We had a negative experience with vyanse, too - super irritable. But adderall was completely fine. Sometimes with medications you just need to keep trying things until you find what works. And sending support for navigating the teen years - I’m sure it doesn’t feel this way, but it sounds like you are doing all the right things. Hang in there!

[ConfrontingChallenge]

Vyvanse works for my son in combination with Guanfacine for ticks, and Sertraline for anxiety. Many or most of our kids a affected with more than just ADHD, and they require more treatment, and maybe more meds as in our situation. Sometimes my son just doesn’t want to take medication. I respond with something like... “Well, then don’t take it. But It does make your life better for now, so if you want that better life, reconsider taking you meds.” He takes the medication. I hope you son’s psychiatrist nails it and offers good advice to smooth the road ahead for your whole family.