I have a four year old that has been diagnosed with ADHD. I am trying to find a sport that would be good for her and I read that martial arts was a great thing for kids with ADHD. My daughter started out great but the last few classes her behavior seems to be getting worse and worse. She is constantly spinning around or laying down on the floor when she's not supposed to be. Today's class she laid on the floor almost the entire class and refused to participate. Before class she's always excited to go and we even practice at home and she does fine. I am really at a loss of what to do because I feel like any sport I put her in we will have the same problems. Also I do not want her to think that misbehaving will get her out of things. Any advice or tips would be greatly appreciated!
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Ashleyvon
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I think your question is really asking how do you deal with your daughters behavior in a structuted setting/class? Part of this can be controlled by the studio you entroll her in and I would recommend you are honest ( which is not easy to do) about her ADHD.
But also it depends on the time of day you are taking her, if she is taking medication that helps to properly control her behavior ( medication can only control %60 of behavior the other %40 needs to be behavior modification) and getting her to understand the rules and maybe setting up a reward system ( if you have not already done this). If she does xxx she gets xxx. Keep it simple by looking at most important things ( at that age all kids wiggle), but it might be listening when the teacher speaks to her the first time ( hugh issue due to impluse control and hyper focus). So if she listens the first time she is spoken to she get xxx for 1/2 the class ( Sorry I have no idea where she is at with things) but in the begining make it easy to acheive. Maybe her favorite music or ice cream..
My son started TKD at the age of 4 years, he is now 12 years old and he is now a 2nd degree black belt in ITF. He also does another version and he has 3 dons. He is also a Jr. leader so he teacher younger children. I say this so you have an example of children that are successful. But more importantly, than the belts is all of the other learn (especially since one of their "rules" is self control), this is all hard to grasp at her age, but contuined guidance is really important.
Also, this is a great place to start to get her ready for a more formal "classroom" if that is the educational path you take in the near future.
I hope this helps if you have more question let me know, but Yes I really think you should keep her in TKD but you need to control her behavior.
Thank you for all the good advice. She Is currently not on medication but we do have an IEP. She is in a great preschool program designed specifically for kids like her with 4 AIDS and one teacher. They cover a lot of Social and emotional skills as well as academic. We do have a reward system setup and I actually talked to her before class about what she needs to do for her reward. This only seems to work if she is already having a good day. The instructor dose know about her ADHD but the classes tend to be pretty large which I'm wondering if this is part of the problem.
I bet she’s getting a little board now with it so she’s finding other ways to entertain herself. You could give her multiple hobbies/play/learning activities. Keep things coming for her to do. Go to a tea party you and the Grannies or a few other 4 year olds that like dress up and pretend except this tea party is actually real and it’s good to let her experience things that young. I think it’s great your finding things for her to go and do at her age. 👍
Perhaps Taekwondo is a bit too challenging for her age / maturity / interest level? Each child is unique, so even though something may be generally good for children with ADHD, it may not be good for your specific child.
My son had a terrible time with soccer, but has completely dove in to Cub Scouts. It's just who he is.
My daughter did karate, and then switched to tae kwan do. She eventually got disinterested. She always enjoyed swimming when we went on vacations, so I started her in a very structured swim program. She became bored with swimming lanes for speed and competition. She is very artistic and musically inclined, so she changed to synchronized swimming, which is like dancing ballet in the pool, with music. She seems to like it, and I was recently told by her school counselor that synchronized swimming is very good for ADHD. She has to learn social skills because she has to swim in duets and with groups. In addition, it is good for auditory processing.
Like most things, it takes time to find the right sport. With time, and some trial and error, you will learn what engages her interest and what doesn't.
I hear you.. that has been our biggest issues with ADHD--more so than with school. My daughter wants to do all these activities and likes them for about three classes and looks like all the other kids and eventually falls behind as the other children progress. It is heart breaking to watch as my daughter spins and falls to the floor during instruction (and she is 7). We saw it at age 4 with her dance class and it really hasn't gone away-- just looks a little different as she gets older--we still have the spins and falls, but it is more about being a beat behind--always.
My biggest advice is to try to find programs that are short (6 weeks tennis lesson, 3 week dance camp, 8 week soccer shots). For us it was the all year programs that were problems. It is stressful because so many sports require an all year commitment to keep up.
The one sport my daughter isn't horrible at due to attention is competitive cheer. It is so fast, involves stunting, tumbling, jumping etc. that it is the only thing she seems to take to. Now, she isn't the best and is definitely one of the weaker kids, but it isn't as noticeable like with dance, karate, soccer, swim team etc. It is also a good sport for her because it is about memorization and performance and doesn't involve quick reaction time or executive functioning skills to change course if needed the way other sports do.
That sounds like what my grandson used to do when he was that age. He is a black belt second degree now. The people who ran his Taekwondo studio also taught special ed so they were so they were fabulous working with him. They'd coax him out on the floor or getting him stand up and stay in line, never yelling.
Speak to the Taekwondo instructors and explain that your daughter has ADHD. They can call her name during class to get her attention or they can use her to demonstrate a kick or a punch. Taekwondo instructors are usually very understanding and compassionate and I am sure they accommodate the classroom setting to making it more “play learning” than a strict structure learning for a 4 year old. At least the dojo where we go gives the 4-6 years “play learning” classes that are only 30 minutes long rather than 45 min or 1 hour long.
My son was diagnosed with ADHD after he had been in Taekwondo for 3 months and though he is on medication it usually wears off by the time class starts in the evenings. He has been doing Taekwondo for 2 years and counting. He is at a Purple belt level and still has his days. For this reason I scheduled one-on-one 15 to 30 minute private lessons every other week so that he can really work on his technique and this has helped him tremendously not only in the classroom setting but also in giving him self-confidence. In addition to Taekwondo he does one 30 minutes class of swimming once a week and one 60 minute Boy’s Gymnastics class once a week. TKD is either 2 or 3 times a week depending on his mood. Sometimes it is just once a weeek but that is because he also does swimming and Gymnastics. I never schedule two activities on the same day so that he does not get overwhelmed.
Overall, I highly recommend TKD, Gymnastics and Swimming simply because they are all sports where the child advances at its own level.
I think it is important to decide are these issues lack of interest or related to her ADHD. To be honest, if her behavior is not acceptable in one class, it will most likely that way in another sport. It also is really import to deal with now before an academic program starts.
Just curious as to why you are chosing to give her medication?
Most of behavior I believe is due to her ADHD. She is not on any medication but we do have an IEP and she is in a wonderful preschool program that teaches them emotional and social skills as well as academic.
Thank you everyone for your great advice, it has been really helpful. We are going to keep her in Taekwondo. It teaches so many important skills and lessons and her instructor is extremely understanding and patient with her. The day I wrote this post she had one of her worst classes but the next day we went back and had a much better day. I am just beginning to understand how ADHD affects kids and how to handle different situations. When she has Hard Day either at home, school or sports I have a tendency to doubt myself in my decisions or parenting techniques. There are so many parenting techniques and suggestions for sports or other extracurricular activities and it's a little overwhelming. Getting opinions from people going through or have gone through the same things really helps.
Ashleyvon- Being a parent to a child without ADHD I am sure is a challange, then ADD the extra stress we have all been in your shoes before. Please don't be to hard on yourself. It sounds like you are doing your best.
The other thing is she will mature and those types of behaviors will change.
From one TKD mom to another, so glad that you are staying with it. I agree rhe life long lessons that our kids learn are amazing.
Best of luck, we are here anytime to help if we can.
Four is young for a structured sport even without ADHD. It is important to find a place where your child can be 4. There are stories about ADHD kids being helped by just about every sport, but your child will get the most out of something she’s doing that she is interested in. My 9 year old daughter has done gymnastics, dance, swimming lessons, swing team, and water polo. Some kids find dance amazing for ADHD but she was bored, so she didn’t put much into it or get much out of it. This is the time for you to help your daughter explore activities, so don’t worry about every activity having to be the perfect fit. If you think it’s more detrimental than helpful to her, try something different. The most important thing is that you are keeping her active and teaching her that being active is a good thing. Any activity is awesome for brain balance.
My son was in Karate at that age and when he misbehaved enough to interrupt class, the instructors had him sit out, either along the wall, watching or with me. He didn't like not having the attention of his instructors and not being involved so he tried really hard not to have to sit on the wall! I wonder if your daughter's instructors could do something like that?
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