Hope: I have been reading post after... - CHADD's ADHD Pare...

CHADD's ADHD Parents Together

12,403 members4,053 posts



I have been reading post after post and researching all about ADHD. At the end of 3rd grade my son got into the special ed program because his ADHD was effecting his learning. He is not medicated. We just started 4th grade and he hates that he is pulled for writing and he says he feels different and doesn’t want to be in there. His writing teacher is already complaining and my son told me that she humiliates him by talking about his test grades in front of other people. So they not understand that this doesn’t help. He isn’t failing it on purpose. It just breaks my heart that all he hears about is his failures and no one to say hey this kid is struggling what can I do to help. I have been contemplating whether we should start meds or not. I love who my child is. He is very informative and passionate about sports, history, and really good with memorizing facts. He’s just not great at getting his thoughts on paper. Is there anyone out there with success stories on taking meds. If so which helped your child and was he the same child just better at focusing. I am visiting the pediatrician soon and want to know what to ask. She only recommended Adderall XR last time and she really had nothing else to say. Any advice will help

7 Replies

Please seek out help with a child psychiatrist vs a pedestrian. They are more experienced to help you try and find the right meds for your son. Based on what your saying, it sounds like your son is really struggling and it’s now effecting his self-esteem which is not good. His school work will continue to get harder and in middle school the teachers will more than likely provide less help. There are a lot of ADHD meds out there . We tried 7 different ones before we found Focalin for my son. He’s been taking it for 5 years and it helps him focus and control his impulses. He wouldn’t be able to function without the help of meds. A dr specialized in ADHD can help you try different meds to help find the right ones.

That’s a sad story, I’m sorry your little man is dealing with a teacher who kinda sucks. But you know what we all at some point have to deal with people who suck so maybe you can teach your son, doing askit together to practice but come up with something great for him to say to her when she does something inappropriate to him have home give back to her but make it s subtle so she won’t really know wha hit her if you know what I mean

I have no idea but my gut feel like your son is probably really awesome and a lot of fun. And you sound like a great mom. I think that’s a great start. And if he does go on meds my only concern is it’s hard I think diagnosising a child and he probably could have adhd but it it were me I’d give him the lowest possible does every day so he can still be him and not over drugged he’s in 3rd grade it’s not like he’s got a mortgage and and a family to feed

Sweetkid-Welcome to our world.. I am sorry you have to go through this. One of the lessons that this journey has taught me is "we live for what is now and we change what is not working". This really applies to medication. So when we were trying different types we evaluated how it impacted his behavior for a certain amount of time and then we kept it or changed it. Always striving for better.

So what I would suggest is, please give it a try and see what you think. If you can't live with it then stop and try to manage it with modifications, accommodations diet change and thearpy (you can and do all this together clearly but starting medication first makes everything else much easier, including life).

I also learned to stop worrying about the future (no more than 6 months). Will my son go to prison becuase he is doing xxx today?

Hope this makes sense..

Good luck.

We are not on medication either, since we were just diagnosed in Kindergarten, but I am anticipating that I will have to use them at some point. I also had the same concerns about meds. When I asked my son’s pediatrician about them, she told me that the meds have a short half-life, like 8 hours (she didn’t name any med specifically). Meaning that my son could take the med before school, it would help him focus during the day, & then by the time he got home , the effects would be gone. She said that during the weekends, holidays, & summer months, he wouldn’t have to take them (unless I wanted him to), since his only issues are during school. I hear a lot of parents say that it just takes time to get the right med & dosage for your kid & it can be frustrating during that time. My co worker has a kid with adhd & she said that the meds for her son helped tremendously with his school day, when I voiced my concern about meds. Good luck in your decisions!

I recommend you report that teacher before she does your child any more harm. That's inexcusable behavior from a teacher. If she has a problem, send him to guidance, but NEVER EVER humiliate him in front of others. Tell the guidance counselor about it and make sure the principal knows as well.

Hello- I think your son's school could provide some accommodations for him in his classroom- things like reduced spelling lists, reduced requirements for writing- extra time on tests, letting him expand his answers to test questions orally etc. I think it is great that you are so articulate about your son's strengths. I think you can let the school know that focusing on his strengths will be more effective at remediating his weaknesses than just trying to "fix" his areas of challenge. I can stand the way the education system hurts so many children- I know teachers care and are doing their best. We just have a system that expects kids to learn the same thing in the same way at the same time and that is not the way humans are.

You may also like...