So Confusing

[Goofy1]

How do you know for sure your child has ADHD? My son has been diagnosed with general anxiety from a therapist. His teachers and regular pediatrician jumped to ADHD. Got an assessment from the school that says he is ED (Emotionally Disturbed). Took him to a psychologist to hear about ADHD meds and assess. Told her about family history of paranoid schizophrenia and hesitation with giving him meds. She says she is not sure it is ADHD. Meet with another Behavior psychiatrist telehealth and she does history and interviews me and dad. She asks if we have thought about high functioning autism and talks about SSRI's.

My son is smart and did well in school until about 3rd grade. He was always full of energy and curious. He didn't have any clear red flags of ADHD, Autism, or Anxiety. He was at a private school kinder through 3rd. It was not the right place for him. We were the odd family ou, on financial aid and not super tiger mom types. We found out later there was alot of bullying. He was going to the nurses office 3 times a day. That is when anxiety started. We pulled him out of that school and put him in the school where I work. I worked as an instructional aid for 3 years and still work there in a different capacity. His first year was crazy but he is now doing much better. Academically he hates doing the work partly because of the other school being so militant and possibly because of something else that is still not clear.

Now my son is 11 and he acts out in anger. Nothing big right now but I worry about when he gets older. I think it is the anxiety but there are some things that are not right. He doesn't let people teach him. He hates talking about things and would yell and lash out before talking. Even when he knows talking will get him what he wants. Would an SSRI (prosac) calm him down enough? Does it sound like ADHD. If I had put him on the stimulant ADHD meds in the beginning I think we would have had a raging lunatic. I don't think any family should have to go through that kind of trial and error. Because of that I am so skeptical of meds but I have not had enough luck with the natural appraoch (B6, Fish oil, Magnesium and talk therapy).

Alone else been on the same kind of journey?

[Aspen797]

Hi! Our son is on the autism spectrum. Along with that come a bit of ADD and a bit of anxiety. He is also gifted, which initially muddied the waters as far as diagnosis goes. We have found that a stimulant helps with focus and guanfacine helps with irritability/emotional regulation. For our son, practice with social thinking concepts, social skills, and positive behavioral parenting have also been critical. Getting the diagnosis right was important for us because it helped us see the root causes of certain behaviors. Once those are identifiable it is easier to either accommodate, teach a missing skill, or choose the right therapy and behavior techniques. It took us two years, but we finally got the diagnosis from a developmental behavioral pediatrician. More here: healthychildren.org/English.... I may be really leaping here—forgive me if so— but do you think his difficulty with being taught things and talking come down to him struggling to see another’s perspective? Our son struggles with perspective taking which can be seen by others as defiance or anxiety. He has gotten much better at recognizing this struggle and being flexible, but it is one of the core features of high functioning autism.

[Goofy1 in reply to Aspen797]

I feel like he just doesn't get the big picture, he cant see why school is important. There is the anxiety of feeling stupid or not knowing. He struggles with that, I think, from the private school setting. It was very academically competitive.

I have read some information relative to ADHD that talks about rejection sensitivity that I can relate to in regards to my son. I think the guanfacine and clanadine help with that. I am going to keep looking at that. We were looking at strattera for the focus part.

BUT now after talking to the behavioral pediatrician she recommended prosac. We will wait until she can meet him and do a full assessment even though she recommended the prosac. It is just such a struggle to know if we are doing the right things. It is exhausting and I hate the waiting and putting off on something that might help him. Thankfully he gets social emotional support services through the school. My husband and I are constantly working to make our house as calm as we can but we are not always perfect. I recently put in for another referral to get back into therapy. I just hope that my son will be more willing to participate this time around.

[Aspen797 in reply to Goofy1]

It’s so tough right now with everything being closed! We have a friend whose son is also 11 and takes Prozac. It does help him feel less anxious which helps his mood. The stimulant our son takes has the opposite effect of what you would think hearing “stimulant”—it helps him be quieter and more focused. There is no one right medication, however. Each kid is unique : ) Glad you’re hooked in with a psychiatrist.

It’s a marathon, not a sprint with our kids so be gentle with yourself too. It sounds as though you are doing everything you can to help your son. Regarding his not seeing why school is important, do you think you could appeal to his logic? How certain classes will help him in college or vocationally? Maybe he can look up different types of jobs that he finds interesting and learn about their requirements For our son, appealing to logic and also using first this (school work/ chores), then that (electronics/free time/ break) is what works . You might want to check out Tilt Parenting if you haven’t already. It’s not so much about how to parent as it is about finding your tribe and nurturing your self. It’s at tiltparenting.com/. Good luck to you!

[Goofy1 in reply to Aspen797]

Thank you for the information on resources!

[Cjkchamp]

I relate to a lot of what you are saying. Our psychiatrist ended up recommending broad spectrum micronutrients before Prozac. They have worked great for our son who is now 8. I highly recommend you research them. There are two companies, Hardy Nutritionals and True Hope.

[Goofy1 in reply to Cjkchamp]

I keep looking for these two brands of micronutrients and I don't get much out I don't know which blend. Can you give any more info? Where do you get them and what jabber you used?

[Cjkchamp in reply to Goofy1]

We use the Hardy Nutritionals Daily Essential Nutrients. If currently using medications, make sure your psychiatrist will work with you because the micronutrients may decrease the dosage of medications, or may eliminate them. If you call them they can answer questions for you prior to any ordering. You can order online; I choose to order over the phone. If you contact True Hope, they can direct you on their products as well. Their version is EMPowerplus.

[Goofy1 in reply to Cjkchamp]

Is it one or two tablets/day or a liquid? How long does one bottle last? Does your child take it easily without complaint?

My son is very picky and complains id nausea daily. Right now he is not taking any medications.

[Cjkchamp in reply to Goofy1]

Be prepared...a full dose with Hardy is 12 capsules/day. My son does 4 in the morning, 4 in the afternoon, and 3 at dinner. Different people need different doses. You can open the capsules, or you can just buy the powder. It looks like the powder might have an added flavor in it. My son is good about taking pills ever since we had to start him on meds at 5. True Hope is less, but I have a friend whose son, under the supervision of a psychiatrist, has been told to take more. You won’t know what your son needs until he is actually taking them. We call them stinky pills because they stink like vitamins. No nausea problems.

[Pennywink]

Hi! Sorry to hear about your struggles! It is definitely confusing - as most people with ADHD usually have something else as well, and in kids many mental health issues can mask as something else. Especially when you have so many professionals with different diagnoses.

My son is 8 with ADHD and Tourette Syndrome, with strong anxiety/ OCD tendencies.

Do you see any of the hallmark signs of ADHD in your child: inattention, hyperactivity or impulsivity? Untreated ADHD can lead to a lot of anger & defiance, though so can other issues - so if you aren’t seeing any of the Classic signs, it’s harder to tell. My son’s anxiety actually gets worse when his stimulant medication wears off - because he has no control & can tell his brain isn’t working right. (He knows what to do, but can’t act upon it.) That’s usually when we see him start calling himself stupid and hints of defiance / emotional instability.

If you are reading about rejection sensitivity, then it sounds like you consulting some solid resources.

[Goofy1 in reply to Pennywink]

I always saw my son as strong willed, curious, and full of energy. Having gone through his anxiety attacks with him I can't imagine giving him astimulant. There are ADHD non stimulant medications that I would consider.

[Pennywink in reply to Goofy1]

There surely are - we tried non-stims first. People with ADHD usually don’t see as much improvement on non-stimulants as with stimulants, but can sometimes better tolerate the side effects. Strattera did help my son most with his anxiety of any medication, though for us it had the most negative side effects of any ADHD medication we tried (but every kid is different.) Guanfacine calmed his body the most, but did not help with focus - though I wouldn’t be surprised if we combine it with a stimulant some day.

How is your son on caffeine? We used that as a litmus for if we thought stimulants would work (and for me, confirmed that he has ADHD.) My son tends to have reverse symptoms anyway (Benedryl does not make him sleepy), so we were surprised, yet not surprised, that caffeine calmed my son down.

[Goofy1 in reply to Pennywink]

The caffine thing is interesting. The one or two times he has had caffeine he was hyper and didn't sleep. It was at a party so lots of running around jumping or just running. We are pretty strict about staying away from it and he sees the correlation so he is fine with it. I wonder if it would help him focus. I have not had the opportunity to see him sit down and work on something after having caffeine.

When he was younger he had to have breathing treatments and they made him jittery and anxious.

[Pennywink in reply to Goofy1]

Got it. Yeah a we avoided caffeine like the plague- why would you give it to a hyper child, we thought? Then I tried it on a hunch, and BOOM - it was shocking how much he calmed down. Only it’s hard to regulate & doesn’t last as long as needed - so we saw a rebound when it wore off. I wouldn’t use it for treatment, it just gave me good insight. 😊

[lbayley]

Just a word about the stimulant medications—we resisted for years putting my 11 year old daughter on medication for her ADHD and I wish we’d done it earlier. The one thing about these medications—they show benefits or side effects right away. You will know within hours if they make things better or worse unlike anxiety or depression medications which can take weeks. They might start with a low dose which won’t have much effect but you would likely notice immediately and discontinue if they made things worse.

[Goofy1 in reply to lbayley]

I have heard this, that we would know right away if it was working or not.

[Onthemove1971]

I wanted to try to answer your question. Since our child is the only one, we had a hard time knowing what ADHD is. But when you live with it you know..

So the first is impulsivity and this leads him not being able to sit still. A Neuro-typical child can sit and do work- something written or desk work. Our children literally are speeding through the world.

Second is the hyperfocus on something interesting. So they are thinking ahead and that almost blinds them. We would be in the car going home and he was already imaging himself on the basketball court in the backyard and could not remember to bring his things in, use the restroom before he was in the backyard shooting hoops.

There are many but the next one is also classic- excessive talkative... always has something to say and it is often not what the task is at hand.

One might look at all of these and think that ADHD doesn't impact a child but it is in every fiber of their body. Without medication, they are unable to focus in school, unable to maintain friendships and just don't fit in.

We spent a few years on a single medication with our Pediatrician and just kinda didn't see any change in school and behavior. When things got worse for him we started seeing a child Psychiatrist and we got medication to help him focus and medication to stop his impulsivity that allows him to feel stable and become successful in school.

Hope this helps some. I have listed the most common there are others like: obsessive about skin, over sensitive to being hurt. Very hard to break a negative habit... There are many more.

Take care,