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ADHD Parents Together
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Attention Moms who have Girls with ADHD

My 7 year old girl is going into second grade in a few weeks and seems to struggle with drastically different things than the boys with ADHD. She is very well behaved, just struggles listening and picking up cues on what to do next etc. Ultimately I see issues around meeting potential most of all. She also doesn't have a very good sense of responsibility like other girls her age.

What behaviors are you all seeing in your girls?

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I feel ya. My daughter is 7 going into 2nd grade. She will be 8 Sept.1st. She holds it together mostly at school and let's me have it at home. She doesn't stay focused, doesn't do her work in a timly mannor or sometimesnot at all. She hates school and just wants to stray home with me. She was diagnosed with ADHD both kinds, OCD, Anxiety-NOS and Sensory issues, she still wears a diaper at night. If it was up to her she would be in a diaper all day. She is very smart and it is difficult for me when I had 2 Neuro typical girls first then her. They were very smart and loved school and being with their friends. This is all new to me. Glad to see we are not alone. Good luck. We start tomorrow.

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Hi! Our daughter is 8 and going into 3rd grade (turns 9 in Dec.). She has a VERY different ADHD than our son. She can't concentrate or retain information. For concentration she takes medicine so that she is not fidgety and can sit still. But retaining information is so hard... and she doesn't even realize it. If she doesn't do what she is asked immediately she will absolutely forget about it 10 seconds later. This also leads to her being very very messy and hoarding things. She doesn't notice the messes she creates and has a hard time concentrating on a task like cleaning up because it takes some time. She is also behind in reading (2 grades behind). We hired a reading tutor twice a week over the summer to try and get her to be more confident. On the upside, she is creative, kind, sympathetic and tries to be helpful - our son is non of these things... so when comparing the two, I will take her ADHD any day, even though it's still hard. We are trying a chart for her now so she can earn rewards... but it is very hard for her to remember all day to keep her clothes clean for example, while other things are easier. Medication has been a huge help as well... we had instances when she didn't take it one day and the teacher would tell us that it's like night and day. All the best to you!

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Your daughter sounds like mine.. You mentioned hoarding and that is a huge issue with my daughter. She also doesn't take care of anything---all her toys are everywhere and never kept together... making her constantly wanting more and more to satisfy her.

She is definitely kind, bubbly and social... but is just a total space cadet. On medication she does great, but her medication is making her stomach hurt in the morning and only lasting until 3 pm, so we are changing doctors to get a second opinion.

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Have you tried reading with her? My son has very similar issues. Reading below grade level. After trying several things I found that what works best is reading together. We chose a book they can test on and we alternate reading chapters. He complained about it for the first week or so but now it's something we all look forward to. It helps with bonding and reading out loud has helped his confidence greatly. He is still not at grade level but he's made giant strides in the right direction and its helped my daughter pass her reading goals.

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My daughter is reading above grade level

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I have a seven year old daughter entering second grade. She is newly diagnosed ADHD primarily inattentive. We are struggling with the decision to medicate as she is not a behavior issue at home. She is very social, bubbly and generally doing just fine. The wheels started coming off at the end of the school year with paying attention in class, constant refocusing from the teacher, forgetting to turn in completed homework, homework sheets not making it home, taking tests very slowly or just losing focus and having to redo it the next day. We are nervous about the upcoming school year and rigors of second grade. I’m with you with the concern for meeting her potential and don’t want her self esteem to be impacted. Good luck to you and your daughter.

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Your daughter sounds a lot like mine. I can tell you that medication isn't an easy decision at all. For my daughter it has really helped with school work. But, it does come with draw backs because the medication does not last very long, so she is like a different person in after school activities and she says her stomach hurts on it.

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What medication is your daughter taking? We are waiting to see how the school year starts before starting the meds since we aren’t really having any problems during the summer. I’m a little nervous with this approach as I don’t want to be setting her up for failure but we kind of are. My daughter is already a picky eater and on the skinny side so worried about some of those side effects. Hope your daughter’s stomach starts tolerating the meds better. What kinds of behavior do you see in your daughter? We are still struggling with accepting the diagnosis really. I hear so little about the Inattentive ADHD.

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It is so hard to describe my daughter's ADHD and most people think I am over blowing her diagnosis because she isn't a behavior problem. To describe my daughters symptoms I would say that she is generally unaware of her surroundings--aloof. She skips instead of walks, she twirls instead of stands. She doesn't have a competitive bone and her body and hates doing activities that require mental stamina or strong executive functioning skills like team sport. Today at Panera I was ordering from one of the machines and she couldn't just stand next to me, but had to twirl and ultimately she ended up on the ground. I worry about her in the parking lot because she doesn't stop and look before running into the street.

She is on 10 mg focalin xr that she takes in the morning. We never had issues with side effects other than loss of appetite, but we have been off for the summer. This week she joined a school prep program and I put her back on the focalin xr and she now says she has nausea for a little bit in the morning. It is terrible, but I am trying to decide if that little bit of nausea is worth it because in every other way it is a great medication for her.

We have been working with her primary care doctor and I just called a Psychiatrist yesterday to make an appointment to get a second opinion on her diagnosis and medication.

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Ditto. Except now, at age 13, I’ll drop her off to meet a friend and ask she’s getting out, I’ll be like - be sure to look before you cross the street! “Ok!” On 2 occasions, it’s immediately “hi friend!” As a car stops short! My kid is competitive for example she loves to talk smack about sports, but there’s not a Great amount of drive. Or if there’s something she is interested in, when it starts to get hard she becomes less interested. As a 13-year-old this takes the form of making excuses or telling me stories about why there’s no track practice… it’s actually a little poignant because my older daughter is in college. We arrived at this diagnosis because my 13-year-old told me she was going to ask the doctor if she had ADHD. After this whole process started and we had some conversations about medication and there possible side effects and benefits, she told me she wanted to try them because she wanted to be able to focus. She’s a kid who earns mostly bees with a smattering of A’s and sees. She told me that she wants to get straight A’s and go to college. I had sort of excepted that she was just going to be a B… Average student… But after hearing about what she wants to accomplish I’m thinking that it would be a shame if I didn’t help her try to reach her goals. Therefore if medication will be helpful that’s what we’re going to try.

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Thank you for sharing. Best of luck with the meds and psychiatrist. Our pediatrician assured me she can handle this but we may go that route eventually as well.

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I also see lots of this space cadet like behavior with my 13 year old. She was JuST diagnosed via full battery tests. I assumed it was just inattention because she’s not tipping over in her chairs. Diagnosis is combined type. The doctor said in girls it’s internal most of the time. I do see this though! If I’m telling her a story, even one that is interesting for her, a lot of times the first thing she’ll say when I’m done is something completely unrelated like, “I feel like chipotle for dinner”.

I always, like ALWAYS knew something was out of the ordinary, but wrote off adhd because she’s ultimately on track or just slightly below on track, is a good happy kid, etc. the testing did show a strong diagnosis of ADHD and also some gaps in her learning due to the adhd. Long division for example. No clue how to do it. At this stage (algebra in the fall) it’s critical she figures this stuff out. While I was originally not interested in meds, I see now the impact of this on her education. She is just at the stage where she really will fall behind.

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Oh. And to add regarding girl behavior, here’s another thing I see- there’s no sitting still watching tv. First, she REALLY doesn’t like movies requires too much tome and concentration I think. If she ever does watch tv or a movie, she’s either on her phone, or if I take her phone away (or when she was little), would be cutting paper, putting glue on her hands, etc.

She does sit still when she’s on her phone but I think that’s because a phone totally taps into that short term concentration thing.

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It's funny because my daughter can watch TV and moves for hours without moving. If she doesn't have the TV she is bored.

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