I posted on here a couple of months ago about possibly feeling depressed and some ongoing issues I had, and everyone was so welcoming and helpful, I'm so grateful for all the replies I had.
I did start feeling better after not too long but more recently I've began to feel extremely down again, I had a couple of panic attacks last week before college and have felt extremely ill and generally completely worn down.
I have been fine coping with the stress of everything for a while now, but it's getting too much; I have exams starting next week, and I really don't think I have enough time to finish all of my revision, I've been getting quite worked up about it all; because of exams, I've been feeling ill coming into college, which makes it worse because I can't concentrate in my lessons; I also feel like I am the subject of quite personal bullying at the moment, which is making me feel rubbish about everything I do, a recent event with a close friend which should not have caused any problems at all has lead to her being extremely hostile towards me, being plain rude and nasty, or just not talking to me, and this makes me want to say of college even more; I also feel like I'm beginning to hate myself again, really, really hate myself. I looked in the mirror last night, and I felt disgusted, everyone says that I'm the perfect size and height and everything, but for the first time, I felt like I absolutely hated my body...I looked at my arms and saw they were too big, my legs were too stubby, and the closer I looked the more I found wrong with myself. I then went too far and cut myself again, worse than last time, it still feels like it's burning and it's been so painful, but I needed to do it.
Now I don't really know what to do, because I don't feel like anything is going to get better anytime soon.
Sorry for the long post