Social Awkwardness

[silliesalamander]

I have no friends. I am basically desperate for friends. But like I’m shy and I get really insecure around people. Insecure in my looks but worse, insecure in my personality. I feel clunky and awkward and like I say nothing right. Since my depression has gone down I long for meaningful friendships. Any encouragement/advice?

[Hidden]

I listen to the news or LBC talk show radio or BBC London - they usually have conversation ideas or you can find some on the internet

[LiveandLetLive42]

Try volunteering! You might connect with people better. I think a lot of people these days feel that way. It’s impossible to be perfect, but be yourself! The more you surround yourself with people the more practice you’ll get. Go shopping, run errands, I always try to engage with the workers too. Like, how’s your day going? Stuff like that! We need human interaction!

[silliesalamander in reply to LiveandLetLive42]

I will have to volunteer for my vet tech program!!

[Penguin13]

Hi there. I was exactly the same as you, crying everyday after school because I felt like such a loser having no friends when everyone else seemed to have some. Remember socialising is a skill, and just like any skill you need to practise to get better. Most people who had little practise playing the piano would be awkward and clunky, but after practise they begin to master it.

The truth is it can be difficult, there will be times when you say the wrong thing but this happens to everyone even the most confident and outgoing people embarrass themselves (probably more often than they care to admit). Volunteering was a great way for me to practise talking to people in a low pressure environment. I volunteered in a charity shop but you should do something that interests you. Hope this helps 😊

[Humanintraining]

Gaming-> Guilds / discord groups / forums / mmo's

Chess -> Clubs, Lichess

Drinking -> Student groups / Youth programs / Scouts

Animals -> Dog training centres, pounds, parks

Reading -> Read in the library instead of at home

Sports -> Any sport has clubs for it

Learning -> You can take up anything from dancing to cooking.

Have a disability?-> People with disabilities are usually united in groups, through facebook or otherwise, to be able to meet and support eachother. There will be local groups of that nature in your area.

Hell I even have a friend that I hold dear because we have the same sexual fetish.

(Sophia if you're reading this, you're to me, forever, the hottest woman in existence)

Basicly, think about what you like, and do these things where other people can see you do them. Talk about them and comment on them, where others can see. If you can share fun, you will share emotion, if you share a certain emotion with people, they'll like you for it.

This isn't dating, it doesn't truely matter how attractive you are, or how well versed.

The key finding people with whom you share emotion and knowledge on a particular subject, and go from there. Meet them more often. Share joy and pain.

Good luck and have fun.

[Hidden]

U got lots of friends here n we all get it 😊

[MidnightBriarRose]

Hi, SillieSalamander,

I have been reading posts today and happened to come across some of your posts, as I follow you on here. Anyway, I just want to offer some ideas and words of encouragement. I can certainly understand wanting to make friends and have them in your life, as that is important at any time in our lives. I can understand that feeling socially awkward makes the process of making friends much harder. So I want to suggest that you do what I am currently doing, as I, also, want to make new friends....especially people that have things in common with me. And since I am currently not working and i have not been leaving my house much, it is harder than normal to meet new people and make new friends. So I decided to look for some online applications that are specifically for making new friends and I found one in the Apple Store, but there are also others in both the Apple store and also the Play Store if you have an Android. So I went ahead and signed up for one that I found in the Apple Store and it is called “Hey, Vina”! and offers a way to meet new friends one on one, instead of being in a large group setting. What is also nice about it is that each person creates a personal profile telling about the things they like to do, as well as hobbies, etc, age range, area they live in, but without having to reveal their address or personal info. And there is also a chat feature, so if you feel shy, you can break the ice by chatting with them online first and if you decide that it seems like a good potential friendship match, you can decide to meet in person if you want to. But that would be completely up to you.

I hope this helps. Also know that no matter how awkward you may feel....you have something special to offer the world and there are others out there who are waiting to make friends with you. There are also things you can do that will help to strengthen your self esteem and learn to appreciate yourself and learn to recognize your strengths as a person. One of these ways is to find something that you are passionate about....such as a hobby or an area of interest, career path, etc and pursue it with all your heart! You’ll be surprised at how much following your passion and the things you are interested in will increase your self esteem. And you will also meet others with the same interests and in doing this you will just naturally make new friends.

Again, I hope this helps and gives you some new ideas to work with! If you have any questions about any of the stuff I posted, please feel free to private message me on here. All the Best to you!!! ❤️🌹😀

[silliesalamander in reply to MidnightBriarRose]

Thanks sooooo much ☺️