I'm making myself miserable by comparing my life to that of others. I'm 39.

[Darren1977]

First of all, my life isn't all that bad and I know others have it worse however I cannot seem to stop comparing myself and whst I have, whst I've accomplished and where I am in life to others. I live alone, have a job I don't hate and I have a gf I'm crazy about though circumstances are difficult as she's 12 yrs older than me with 2 teens and I know I will not have kids with her but she makes me laugh. I just feel really unfulfilled in my life and seem to make excuses for not doing things though i do have dreams and things I'd like to do. Im quite shy and fear being judged. I was emotionally bullied at school as we were quite poor and this made me really defensive and stubborn but I fear it's stopping me building relationships with strangers. I see others carrying on with their happy lives, having kids, doing the family things, going on holidays, having circles of friends and then look at myself. As a result I'm up and down with my weight, lack energy and can be very moody, though most that know me would assume I'm happy from the outside. I'm starting to resent people for enjoying their lives when I just make excuses for not taking chances. Am I the only one?

[chloe40 Administrator]

Hi Darren1977

Sorry to hear you're feeling like this, especially when you have so much going on in your life. Maybe you would benefit from talking therapies, to discuss all that happened when you were younger, if that is what you feel is holding you back, certainly worth a try.

Chloe

[Hidden]

Hello Darren1977 and welcome to our Community.

I can assure you that you are not alone Darren1977. However, comparing your life with the lives of others is not helpful and can often lead to negative emotions and behaviours.

I agree with Chloe that talking therapy may help increase your self-esteem and confidence. Please do keep in touch, I wish you well,

Lottie