I want to kill someone....

[JammyBee]

I have graves disease and about 6wks ago my endo doubled my PTU as my TSH would just not budge.

I literally feel like a monster at the moment, I am so angry and irritable and I just cannot control it, My poor boyfriend just gets it in the neck and it's really starting to take a toll on our relationship. I just can't tolerate people and almost just want to be on my own all the time as it would just be easier. At the moment I have no idea whether it's my bloods that aren't right or it's just a phase, but I can't seem to snap out of it.

I'm turning into a horrible person who flies off the handle at any given opportunity, I feel frustrated, angry, annoyed all the time and it's pretty miserable!

I feel like i'm loosing the plot a bit

[helvella Administrator]

Do you know what your Free T4 and Free T3 levels were?

TSH is not particularly important in itself and can take quite a while to recover, so I understand. But your self-portrait does rather sound like you are still at high levels of thyroid hormone.

[JammyBee]

I don't know, I am due to have bloods next week and another Endo appointment a week after that, when I saw him in January my T4 and free T3 were OK, but he was worried that my TSH was still surpressed after 4/5months.

The strange thing is I feel better in other ways, I don't have a tremor, sweats etc but it is like I have been possesed! I am also getting married this year so the stress of that is not helping!

Thank you

[Joyia]

Too much going on perhaps, sorting your medication is obviously of paramount importance but it is also good to look at other stressors in your life. Can you delegate any tasks to others with regard to your impending marriage, avoid people who cause you stress, this is an important one, Dr Lam makes this point to help the adrenals recover; give up caffeine as this can aggravate the nervous system; when you feel the first stirrings of irritation walk away and take moments out. I had graves disease years ago and sympathise with horrible feelings of irritation and anger that can occur, looking back I was not in tune with myself as much as I am now and allowed others demands to come first which overloaded my system further.

We are physical, mental and spiritual beings which means we need to look at our lives from different angles, it is good to remind ourselves it is ok to say "no" to allow space to enter....

I know it is difficult when you feel ill but finding a quiet place in fresh air does help calm the mind especially if you just focus on your breathing watching the breath in and watching the breath out. Take note of how your mind becomes more peaceful.

I hope your Endo is being cooperative and helpful, keep posting updates here and do anything that you think will help to keep you cool.

Best wishes

Joyia

[greenginger]

Hi I agree with Joyia about external stressors. Hencce I dont talk to my family any more!

Your TSH is not as important at this early stage. I have Graves and after nearly 2 years on carbimazole I still have issues with Graves Rage. Especially at that time of the month.

Can I ask why you are on PTU? Have you tried carbimazole?

Phone your GPs or endos and ask for a print out of all your old blood tests and put them on here.

[JammyBee]

I think you're right regards the extennal factors, i think sometimes you forget about normal trials and tribulations in life.

I have had Graves for 6yrs now and I just wasnt doing very well on Carbimazole, it just made me crash out very very quickly and made me very depressed, to the point where I would rather be hyper than be on the meds.

I have felt better on PTU, and I my sysptoms are much bette, but I don't normally get this irritated and angry. I do just need to take a step back and then my fiance my realise why he is marrying me in the forst place haha!

Thank you, I when I get my bloods I will post them up here.