Hi all – more of a mental health question, but I suspect it may be thyroid-adrenal related. (If anyone thinks I'd be better off asking this question in another group, any suggestions would be appreciated.)
OK… I'm having a bit of a crisis, and it's shone a light on how badly I deal with stress. It feels like something's physically broken and has been for a long time, possibly since early childhood. (I'm now in my fifties.) I seem to operate at two 'speeds' – low energy, or stressed out, obsessive and full steam ahead, which leads to shakiness and eventually exhaustion. I'm also not able to eat while I'm stressed, and often reach for junk food when I finally get hungry.
I'm self-employed, following redundancy, with a regular part-time booking, which I've settled into. I need to supplement my income elsewhere, but tend to worry about making a good impression and get into 'full-on' mode.
e.g. Last week I got a booking. While I think they underestimated how much work was required, I 'absorbed' that and what was meant to be a quick assessment of what it would involve, turned into a 'deep dive'. I'd done my usual 9-5, started the extra job after that, and finished shortly before midnight. I was then too 'wired' to sleep. It got me ahead for the actual day I worked on the job, but I'll probably end up undercharging (I don't want to price myself out of subsequent work).
Likewise, yesterday I worked for a different company. Wires were crossed and two managers gave me different instructions. I tried to accommodate both, and ended up working late again. I was doing a fairly routine task for one (but spotted errors that needed to be fixed), and the one who'd originally booked me wasn't happy that I'd got bogged down in that. (They didn't get angry but they got stressed, which I felt bad about.) So I switched to doing work for the original boss, then hopped back on the other job for several hours (beyond what I was hired to do).
This is not a sustainable way to work. I got a night's sleep of sorts, but fairly broken, and I've woken up feeling stressed.
I feel like I'm reaching the end of my rope. Ideally, I'd like another regular part-time job that fits with the other one, but I may have to look for a full-time job. I try to avoid taking on work outside my comfort zone, but that's not always possible. I spent about five years (and a load of money) on therapy in my late 30s / early 40s but don't feel it was of much benefit. (I felt like someone with a broken leg being told to get up and walk.)
I appreciate that everyone has their struggles, but I feel like I've been dealing with whatever ails me for a long time. I have friends, but not a support network. (I feel like I bent everyone's ear back in the day and they're over it now.) And self-care's gone out of the window.
Does this kind of thing sound familiar to anyone here? Thanks in advance for your thoughts.
Written by
Taffhamster
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You might be stressed because you are simply asking too much of yourself. It sounds like you are overworked to me.
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One of the things I found out about myself is that low iron and low ferritin (iron stores) caused me great anxiety. I also used to be depressed a lot of the time. I discovered that I could buy iron supplements without prescription, but absorbed them poorly. I ended up taking a maximum dose of iron supplements for nearly two years to raise my ferritin to mid-range, then started taking a maintenance dose for five years before my serum iron started to rise. I made sure to keep my ferritin as close to where I wanted it to be throughout all this. I tested regularly to make sure none of my iron test results were getting too high, because iron is toxic at high levels.
With sufficient iron/ferritin I discovered that my anxiety vanished and my depression was hugely reduced.
I also found that improving my B12 and folate with methylated forms of supplement (methylcobalamin and methylfolate) improved my mood substantially. Cyanocobalamin and folic acid did absolutely nothing for me and I avoid them completely.
Cortisol - saliva cortisol testing is worth doing, and acting on the results appropriately. I had high (well over the range) cortisol and found an adaptogen (Holy Basil) that helps to damp down my cortisol a bit. It helps to reduce my life-long insomnia. People with low cortisol have some self-help options too.
Thanks so much for this. I think my ferritin's OK (my mum had haemochromatosis, so I think I may tend towards high results), but folate's always been low. Thanks for the B12 and folate supplement advice – that's something I'll definitely look into. Cortisol testing, too.
Have you got B12 injections or supplements via GP or are you now self supplementing
Low Ft3 results in body running on adrenaline to compensate for low thyroid hormone
Tired but wired is classic result
Suggest you retest thyroid and vitamin levels
is you hypothyroidism autoimmune
Are you on gluten free diet
Recommended that all thyroid blood tests early morning, ideally just before 9am, only drink water between waking and test and last dose levothyroxine 24 hours before test
This gives highest TSH, lowest FT4 and most consistent results. (Patient to patient tip)
Thank you for this detailed response – very much appreciated.
I'm due for tests soon, so I'll make a note of the above.
B12, I'm on this natureprovides.com/products... but haven't felt much of a difference. (I have 2 bottles left, so I'll give it more time and rethink if I have no joy.)
As far as I know my hypo isn't autoimmune. (I tested negative for Hashimoto's way back in the day.) I'll mention it to the GP.
Not gluten free, but that's worth looking into. (A bowl of pasta knocks me out like I've had a few pints and can upset my digestive system.)
Unfortunately all too familiar. It was (and still remains) a survival issue. Learned behaviour. No diagnosis meant left with only ‘yourself’ to blame. This behaviour becomes quite deeply ingrained and I have found it difficult to leave behind. Maybe some counselling might allow you to look at your behaviour from a different angle. Plus all sorts of things which are advised on the forum. I have not got the Gluten Free thing nailed yet but I have noticed I am considerably calmer. Never thought this would be a result of GF. Crikey.
Hi arTistapple – sorry for the late reply. I do really need to look into GF – nothing to lose by trying, I think. I haven't ruled out counselling, but I'd need to give some careful thought about what form it would take. I feel like I spent a lot of time on money on therapy that was of very little benefit in the long run.
Taffhamster, I found that my panic attacks literally disappeared over night when I gave up gluten. I still get a bit of anxiety from time to time but nowhere near as bad. I used to wake up with panic, heart racing etc, every morning and had very regular panic attacks. I can’t tell you the improvement.
One of the important things involved in good quality counselling is a path forward. However that can’t stand on its own. You need to look back as well as forward and most importantly you need someone who ‘hears you’. I think it’s a really big thing for people with thyroid issues. No-one but us seems have a clue how all this affects us.
I have had a lot of counselling too. I hate to think how much I spent. Some of it excellent and some of it duff. However GP practices often have something called ‘TalkingTherapies’ that you can tap into for free. Highly qualified people. The Wren Project advertise on this Forum. I have found them to be excellent. Helped me move along. It’s free too. Remember it’s your plan. It’s your life and any counsellor worth their salt works to enable you, mistakes and all.
There are plenty mis-takes on this road. I can vouch for that.
I'll definitely look into that – thanks so much. With hindsight, I didn't 'click' with my therapist at all. At the time, I viewed this as not necessarily being a bad thing – I couldn't use my usual 'tactics' of hiding behind humour, etc. But I stuck with it for too long before finally quitting in frustration (which seemed to be mutual, but the therapist was still getting paid!) So it's great to get a positive recommendation. Thanks again!
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