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[DippyDame]

Just a thought!

[HealthStarDust]

Always hated the word resilience. Sean to suggest if there nothing wrong with me and my life except my reliance. Health a mess and roof falling down? Sure, it my resilience that’s the issue.

The word needs to go.

[arTistapple in reply to HealthStarDust]

I think it’s not a modern word and it’s certainly not a modern concept. However I have to say I have felt it in my journey to get well. One doctor said to me “You can’t take T3 and T4 (levo) can’t help you any more.” Well I just had to stand up, dust myself down. And start all over again. (After bawling my eyes out). With all the people on this forum.

[HealthStarDust in reply to arTistapple]

I have never been lucky enough to feel ‘resilient’. Nor do I assume my experience negate yours.

For me, there are far far too many ingrained structural barriers and health inequalities involved in achieving any semblance of good health. So much so the word does not apply to my experience, and never will.

I have come to hate its use in healthcare and wellbeing circles, especially as it inherently implies that the fault lies in the individual and not the system.

My resilience has nothing to do with how well I can handle my health. It has everything to do with my financial means, and social capital.

That’s just me.

[arTistapple in reply to HealthStarDust]

And you are here. That’s what I understand about resilience. In the face of everything, you are here. So many people, in my limited experience, never get here. After diagnosis and I started finally getting out a bit, I was shocked by how many people I found to have thyroid issues. These conversations had never been raised before but I raised them myself as I now had a diagnosis. I wanted to talk to people find out about their experience. What was helpful/unhelpful. I had been fearfully watching other people (usually women) for a fairly long time prior to diagnosis, because they were walking about in the way that I felt I was being forced to walk. I had no idea hypothyroidism had a particular gait associated and I was sure I did not have arthritis. I thought these women had severe arthritis. I was determined I was not going to walk that way. Anyway when I started with a craft class my daughter pressed me to attend, I discovered two other people there with thyroid issues and one at my allotment (my husband has to tackle this on his own now). One was hyperthyroid (being treated) and really displayed slight hypo symptoms I would say. However the one that intrigued me was hypo, dreadfully overweight (bigger than myself), she could not get around hardly at all it seemed to me, much much worse than myself. However what shocked me was she was clearly very happy with her treatment! I had to bite my tongue. What can I say? It’s not my job to upset her applecart. She seemed genuinely and profusely admiring of her doc and her treatment. I watched her getting into her car. I could have cried. It was so painful (and scary) watching someone moving about like me, only more so.

Why am I telling you this? Because it is about resilience of an entirely opposite type. I could not be that type of resilient. It’s just not me. On the face of it, it’s a lot less comfortable having my kind of resilience, the kind that pushes us towards the forum (maybe). BUT in a way, I kind of admired that woman, to be able to overcome everything, to be sociable, to be happy, to be appreciative of her (lousy) treatment and situation.

I have not heard the word used in healthcare. I have not noticed any healthcare going on in this country. It’s certainly not my experience and I am inclined to think it’s a term entirely unrelated in any case. I am wondering if you work in ‘healthcare’?

[HealthStarDust in reply to arTistapple]

We don’t have to agree.

I’ve said all I have to say on the word.

[Zephyrbear]

When you’re lucky enough (like you and me) to be in charge of your treatment and not reliant on “professionals” to feel as well as you can with this insidious condition, then you can feel very resilient and I hope we do inspire others, but a lot of people just setting out on this journey won’t have reached that point yet. I don’t suppose either of us started out resilient and it’s only after years of maltreatment and educating ourselves we have got to this point so, although we can inspire hope in others that should be tempered with the warning it won’t happen overnight.

That said, yes I am very happy to be one of the resilient army marching (or at least shuffling) beside you in this war on “professionalism”!

[FoggyThinker]

I LOVE seeing the odd post from someone saying they're doing well, or they've figured something out, it's a total joy and yes, it does give me hope

[DippyDame]

It's perhaps worth remembering that being resilient doesn't mean a person doesn't experience stress, emotional upheaval, and suffering.

Resilience involves the ability to work through emotional pain and suffering.

I guess we are all doing that at some level.

[Hidden in reply to DippyDame]

I have a personal dislike for the idea of people ‘fighting’ cancer. You can’t fight cancer. It’s an uncontrollable beast which gnaws away at your mind and body until it gives up or you die.

I understand why the term is used but no one’s resilience or willingness to fight should be judged by the outcome of this dreadful disease.

[DippyDame in reply to Hidden]

Indeed.

It's all about semantics I guess.

I've certainly been encouraged by the experiences of others on this forum when in a very dark place.

"Hope" is key

To quote Martin Luther King...

"We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope.”

Here, I'd suggest, we all need hope

[Hidden in reply to DippyDame]

Thank you for that. A wonderful quote so relevant to us all.

[arTistapple in reply to Hidden]

I must say I have particular dislike for this phrase about cancer.

[thyr01d in reply to Hidden]

Mmm, everywhere2, I share your dislike of 'fighting' cancer, and that's as a survivor having been told by the surgeons they didn't know if they could save me. But I never 'fought' it. I accepted it and knew I wanted to live longer (I had 3 young children) but also that if this was the end of my time then there was no point in adding distress about that to the mix. But perhaps for people who need a feeling of control, or perhaps competitive people, maybe they like to see themselves as 'fighting' and winning? I agree completely that no one's resilience or willingness to fight should be judged by the outcome.

[LindaC in reply to DippyDame]

Well, I have always been adaptable and resilient, after my paternal G'mother! I usually tell 'them', that I have "The strength of an Ox and the b*lls of a Lion". Not sure I'd have gotten through this without that. xox