Feeling really unwell. Hyper and stressed.

I spent yesterday sitting with my weeks old grandson for 2 hours in the hospital. He is being transferred to a children's hospital today. He will be under the care of a cardiologist and has to have open heart surgery. I feel so helpless with Parkinson's and Hyperthyroid. Unable to help my daughter as I would like to. She has a 3year old too who is missing mummy.

On top off all that I had a text off my ex the day before yesterday to ask if we could talk. My sons have told him to leave me alone. I had an awful 30year marriage and at the end there was some violence. It really upset me and I couldn't get it off my mind all day.

I woke this morning In the early hours and again my thoughts were racing. Eventually I got up. Had very bad headache and then my stomach was very upset.

Still have the headache. I haven't been feeling particularly well for a couple of weeks on 5mg Carbimazole and have wondered if I am going hyper again. Also felt near to tears for days now.

Would love your thought and advice. Due a blood test this week

Cicely

[Clutter]

Cicely, Don't berate yourself for being unable to help your daughter more. If you were fit as a fiddle you wouldn't be able to lift this weight from her.

As you are unwell and very stressed it doesn't seem a good time to find out what it is your husband wants to discuss. I'd be inclined to ignore him or tell him you'll be in touch in a few weeks. You don't have any obligations to someone who was violent and abusive to you.

I hope your grandson's surgery will be successful and allow him to have a full and beautiful life.

[Hidden in reply to Clutter]

Hello Clutter, unfortunately my daughter texted me to say that she has had to return to the local hospital for now. He has two holes larger than thought. Back to the children's hospital in 2 weeks. Has to have continual monitoring to see how he reacts to the medication which will buy time. They will operate to put a band across to make the hole smaller if needs be then lastly heart surgery at 6 to 9 months. So it looks like lots of time at the hospital.

It was amazing watching his little face yesterday watching the rain on the windows he's so alert even though he struggles with his breathing.

Heartbreaking!

My daughter said she and her partner were stunned and terribly upset.

Cicely

[Clutter in reply to Hidden]

My heart goes out to all of you, Cicely. I hope he responds to the treatment. xx

[Hidden]

Thank you Clutter xx

[yorkshiregirl44]

When i saw your post i wanted to reply if only to say please dont be hard on yourself for what you feel you cant do right now. Expectations are something we put on ourself and feel we have failed when we dont reach them. Look at it as it is, you are unwell with a chronic condition and you are having to deal with changing emotions with your grand childs illness and your role as a mother and a grandmother.

I also agree that speaking to your ex at this time might not be helpful to you. I worked in domestic violence for 20 years and in my expereince for what its worth is that usually the abuser wants something from you when things are not going too great ....

You left an abusive relationship but please dont carry any doubt that you were partly responsible...you were not...abuse is always the sole responsibilty of the abuser and you owe him nothing.

I hope the pressure eases for all your family ...

Christine

[Hidden]

Thank you for your reply and your understanding of my situation.

[silverfox7]

Thinking of you all. Just take each day at a time and if its not too good then try to accept that in the hope that tomorrow will show some improvement. The little one sounds like a fighter. Being interested in the world around him sounds positive. Concentrate on keeping yourself as well as possible and that means keeping away from negative distractions like your ex husband till things are better all round.

[Hidden]

Thank you silver fox You are so right. We can all go down that negative slope at times. I must stay positive.

Think my thyroid might be the problem too. With the upset stomach, hot flushes and tears. Also waking in the early hours. Hopefully getting blood test tomorrow and seeing GP.

It would be easier if my daughter lived in my area but it's a different county and town.